The Dark Princess
by broken.empty.doll
Summary: A mobster's daughter has to run from New York to Japan. She ends up as a yakuza boss and by threatening some people, at Ouran Academy. How will she actually deal with all these rich people? Will she get fed up and one day snap? Or will someone close to her betray her once again? OHSHC fanfic, OC-centric, eventual Kyoya x OC
1. This sinking feeling

**Chapter One: This Seeking Feeling**

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><p><strong>You can get much further with a kind word and a gun then you can with a kind word alone.<strong>

_**Al Capone**_

**This life of ours, this is a wonderful life. If you can get through life like this, hey, thats great. But it's very, very unpredictable. There are so many ways you can screw it up. **

_**Paul Castellano**_

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><p>Rumors spread fast in any high school. They spread even faster at Ouran Academy: the playground for the extremely rich and relatively beautiful. Their motto: lineage counts first, wealth a close second. Well this school was going to seemingly get a dog. It was only a week into the school year and already there was a transfer. This is where the rumors started. And boy did they start.<p>

But what made these rumors one of a kind was that they surrounded one girl and the information on the girl was desperately scarce. As you might have guessed, she is the transfer in this tale. What we know about her is minimal at best. Her whole existence was practically myth. You will see that this girl is real but for the beginning she is shrouded in mystery. But maybe we should tell you a little bit about her. It would be the polite thing to do.

The girl was from America and her nickname was the Dark Princess. A very terrible nickname I do agree, but unlike how it might be, it suited her. In addition the nickname preceded her transfer. The nickname wasn't started in Japan but rather in the glittering city of New York. This is where the information got a little unreliable.

It was said that she was a mafia boss's daughter. Then they branched out and said that she was the mafia boss herself. The rumors were even as bold as to say that she had killed other mafia families and was running from the American government. Others were even more ridiculous and said that she was really an assassin who was paying tuition with her blood money.

This tale, you will learn that not everything is as it seems. Some of these rumors are true. Others are so absurd that they make me laugh and chuckle. I guess I'll let you in on a little secret. I'm the girl. I am the Dark princess.

I am the girl who came to Japan with a certain mission. But you wouldn't know that would you. As the saying goes, if I tell you I would have to kill you. Maybe if you guys grow on me, I'll let you know. I really like keeping you guys waiting is all, but I guess I can tell you where I came from. In short, the rumors are true. I was in the mafia. I was adopted and taken in by a mafia boss. Well, he wasn't the boss when he took me in, but he became boss around the time I turned twelve.

My father is boss of the Lucchese crime family. We're one of the five crime families in New York, so goes to say, we're pretty much famous. That makes us feared everywhere. I met my father when I accidently walked in on a drug bust. The cops had been waiting outside a warehouse building that I had recently shacked up in. When I went inside, there standing in the middle of what I had called my living room was a bunch of criminals.

My ten year old self was very scared, but when they asked me what I was there for, I mentioned the cops were outside. So unknowingly I aided their escape and was taken down to the police station for questioning. The police, seeing that I was actually innocent, sent me back to the foster home I had initially run away from.

That was my first interaction with crime. Of course, it wasn't like I went out and tried it again by myself. Instead the exact same thing happened after I ran away from my foster home for the second time. This time I tried to stay under the Brooklyn Bridge. Of course, the Lucchese family had to be doing another drug trade and of course, the cops were waiting, and of course, I just happened to save them. Again. The cops took me to the station, but this time they didn't let me go.

I remember sitting in that cell, alone because everyone else was there for some deep shit and the cops didn't want other criminals to hurt me. But then there was a shadow. Through my crying eyes, a shadow hid me from the world and then a soft voice spoke to me. They told me that they had paid the bail set for me and that I got to go home. I remember chuckling and telling the man I didn't have a home. He said, that he would give me one, one with him.

My new home was the Lucchese family and my new father was none other than the mafia boss Steven Crea. Of course, he was only underboss at the time. But when he did become boss, he taught me everything I know now. He taught me that wherever I went, if I had my memories, I would never be alone. The Lucchese crime family took me and by the time I turned thirteen, I was inducted into their ranks. My dad wanted me to become the family attorney, but I wasn't cut out for it. We could all see that I didn't speak as eloquently as I should with strangers, and that my panic attacks when I wasn't with my gang were frequent.

So instead, as the rumors said, I became a mafia boss. Of course it was of only the Brownsville crew, or the Vario crew, in Brooklyn, but it was still a large crew and we still did illegal things. Things started to really change when I became boss. Being fifteen, I went to the best schools. Steven always making sure I got the education I deserved. But what I did do well in the gangs, was also what I did at school. I learned. I learned the best ways to avoid the cops, at the same time that I learned math.

Because I learned so well, I became one of the best Caporegimes—leaders—my father ever had. So, on my fifteenth birthday, my father allowed me to play in a death match. Now you might think video games and players controlling chess pieces on a board, and that's what they are. But it's more complicated than that, because instead of wooden pieces there are real humans and instead of people on a controller there are mob bosses.

Now, you're probably thinking that my father hates me or doesn't care about me that much if he is risking my life. At the time I would have agreed. I was confused as to why he would take me in, and then use me like a worn out rag ready to discard. I learned why he did this when I finished the game. He did it because he believed in me. He did it because he had now doubt I would win.

I became the Dark princess after that, playing in death matches and being the one who orchestrated them. I became undefeated when wielding the Vario crew and my legacy spread throughout the country. My father was proud of me. I was proud of myself. I was like a Dark princess, who played her games in the shadow of her father. But I won these games, so my men wouldn't die, so our men wouldn't lose so easily.

But now I'm just rambling. I seem to do that a lot when it's just me. I can also tell that you want to know where I fit in in Japan. The real answer is something that I really shouldn't tell you, but I probably won't ever meet you. I hope. If I do, that means you're either dead or about to be tortured until you're dead.

The reason I'm coming to Japan is because I messed up. I technically didn't do anything wrong. No, I just got the short end of the stick. The rumor you heard about me coming to Japan because I was running from the police is spot on. But I wasn't caught because I wasn't careful. No, someone just ratted me out. Father took care of him before he sent me off of course, but Father had to make sure that I would be protected wherever I might go.

So he made sure that I was going to be welcomed on the other side of whatever plane I took. That plane was headed for Tokyo and I was going to be welcomed by one of my father's associates. Father knew that I could never return to America. I think I'm actually on the FBI's most wanted list—a seventeen year old on the FBI's wanted list, picture that!

So he had me get a gang over in Japan, or rather should I say Yakuza. But not just any Yakuza. He got me the yakuza which gets in wars every now and then. He got me the yakuza who doesn't take allies He got me he yakuza which just so happens to be the rival of the largest yakuza out there. Father got me the yakuza which had problems. Problems which take time and money and many life or death games to actually fix. Now, I'm boss of Dojin-kai.

Father actually planned it right. He knows that wherever they send me, I'll make a gang. Gangs are my life, literally and figuratively speaking. How else would people like me get the love of family? So now I have to worry about this new gang, because they didn't come without enemies. I think that's the main reason they allowed me in: because they know that they can't handle them by themselves. I have to worry about moving the whole syndicate to Tokyo also.

So, before I went to Ouran Academy, I took care of that stuff. Well, more or less took care of that stuff. I'm still trying to get the syndicate settled in Tokyo. Plus I now have to look out for the Kasanoda-gumi syndicate. But I can do that at Ouran because their boss's kid goes there. But all in all it was good. That is, until the minute I stepped foot onto Ouran Academy grounds. This is my sort of story. The story which I'm still living and I'm still dreading.

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><p>The first thing I thought was, 'I'm going to throw up'. This foreboding feeling entered my body the minute I stepped through the gates of Ouran Academy. Then, I actually looked at the school. The school was pink in color and huge. I stared at it for a while, wondering if I could just go to a regular high school. I shook my head in protest. Don't want to be with normal people. Can't deal with Kasanoda like that.<p>

"_I have to go in"_ I muttered in English to myself. Subconsciously playing with my lip piercings and clutching my long board tighter, I sighed. I pushed my hair behind my ear and felt my piercings there. Maybe I should have taken them out, I wondered as I went towards the office. But then again, I didn't even have a uniform yet, so it would probably won't matter.

I walked through the empty halls, and felt the sinking feeling again. Maybe I was really nervous. It is nerve-wracking to get into the high school for the rich and pretty all the while being a mob boss. I sighed, tucking my hair behind my ear once more. It was a nervous twitch I just couldn't shake. After five minutes, I found the office and to my surprise, no one there.

"Um, hello," I called in Japanese. My accent was terrible. Father had been preparing to send me to Japan while I was still under investigation, so I knew just about everything. Well, I really hope I know everything.

"Yes," an older woman came to the desk and gasped. She took in my appearance and I could feel my cheeks turning red under her scrutiny. She had her hair in a bun and wore a blue suit.

I on the other hand, looked nothing of the sort. My hair was dyed a blond at the tips and cut to be a short shaggy bob. The rest of my hair was a deep black which rivaled the color of my soul. My hair did nothing to hide the many piercings in my ears. My right held an industrial, double lobes, an orbital and a cartilage at the top. The left ear held double lobes, four cartilage, an orbital and my favorite a snug. The bangs of my haircut hid my forehead and partially hid my dark green eyes.

Looking to the woman, she further studied me and I bent my head down in pure embarrassment. Fiddling with my snake bite piercings, I wondered how my outfit seemed to her. I wore black skinny jeans with holes in the knees. My shoes were regular old black vans and my shirt was merely a white v-neck. Bandages under my hair in the back of my head hid the tattoo I had just gotten. I finished off the look with a dark purple cardigan. My outfit was somewhere between 'I look like I should be in a gang' with 'my mother made me wear a nicer top and a cardigan'.

Actually my whole look screamed foreign. I screamed foreign. My skin wasn't the pale white like the rest of the population. Instead my tone was an olive that rivaled that of the Italians. Then my body shape wasn't petite. It wasn't even that athletic. It was muscled. Instead of being stick thin, I had the curves of a fully grown woman. I wasn't a size 2 or 4, rather a larger size 8. Nothing about me said I was supposed to be here. But I can't help that now. Sighing, I looked up once more and steadied myself.

"I am here," I began in Japanese with my heavy accent, "to get m-my schedule."

"You're then new student?" she asked a little fast. I looked at her in the eyes and saw a different emotion than arrogance run through them. There was a certain amount of fear.

"Yes. I'm Susan Crea," I replied. Her eyes went wide and all life drained from her face. She went to the desk behind her and gathered some papers into her hand. Turning back to me, she gave me them, her hand shaking with fear. She came around the front desk and went to the door to the right. I waited, long board and schedule in hand, for her to speak again.

"Kazama-san," she said to the person on the other side of the door, "the girl is here."

"Send her in," came from the other side. The woman looked to me and I started walking towards and through the door. On the other side was a large room. The huge windows cast light at an older man at his desk. The man wore a suit and had glasses, a mustache and a small beard.

"Crea-san, I hope it wasn't too much of a hassle finding the office," the man said slowly. He put his hands together and brought them to his face in a thinking pose. I approached the desk and sat gently in one of the chairs in front of him.

"No, sir," was my only reply. I was still embarrassed from how the secretary stared at me. Her fear was normal. Once people learned I was a mobster, they really didn't want to hang out with me anymore. I didn't care. I had my gang to hang out with anyway.

"I am assuming that you will get a uniform by the end of this week," he said slowly again. I glared slightly at him, not liking how he had to speak slowly for me to understand him. He took the glare as me not liking his words and he quickly backpedaled his words, saying, "not that your outfit is in anyway immodest, but the students will be sure to talk. We don't want anyone getting hurt, is all."

"No one here will get hurt," I told him softly. His face softened but hardened again when I said, "If they leave me alone, I will leave them alone also."

"Very well then." His hands went up to his face again. I wonder if that is his nervous twitch. Gently putting my hair behind my ear, I waited for him to speak. When the silence grew unbearable, I finally spoke up.

"So, who are you exactly?" I asked quietly.

"I am the vice-principal" he replied, hands still at his face.

"Oh," I muttered. This was getting really awkward really quick.

"I hope you find your classes acceptable. I put you in the second year here, after your father called," he coughed awkwardly and now I understood his fear. He continued, "He asked me to put you in class A, but I told him that it was impossible. But because your father insisted that you were the extremely polite and intelligent, I found a space for you."

"Thank you sir," I replied with a knowing look. My father literally threatened him to put me into the special class. I would have been fine in the class with the rest of the yakuza kids.

"You're welcome," he told me, sighing the words. I rose, looking to my schedule and class.

"My first class is Japanese history. Which way should I go?" I asked politely. I wouldn't want my father to eat his words.

"You can go towards the south wing and then make a right. It's on the other side of campus," he replied as I grabbed my long board.

"Thank you for all your help sir. I promise to get a uniform by the end of this week." I bow slightly to the man and head out the door. The secretary doesn't look up at me and I don't say thank you. We didn't want to have a replay of her literally staring at me again. I grab my board and find the path that leads to the south wing. Dropping the board on the ground, I jump on and begin to ride.

"_That couldn't have gone any worse,"_ I told myself aloud in English.

The familiar sound of my board going over cracks filled the air. It was surprisingly quiet for such a big campus. Messing with my lip, I wonder what I should say to my class. Surely they are going to want me to introduce myself. I could feel the embarrassment already begin. How could I run a whole syndicate without ever flinching, but die slightly with the thought that I had to introduce myself to a classroom? The world may never know.

I finally made it to the south wing and rode through the halls, hands in my pockets. Looking at the numbers, I finally found my room and stopped in front of it nervously. Messing with my lip, I took a deep breath. Wait, should I knock? Or do I just walk in? Oh my god, it's one of those slidy doors too. Can I even knock on this door? Will it break? But what if I don't knock and something happens, something will certainly happen.

I clutched my longboard to my chest with both arms. Don't be intimidated by a slidy door. It's just a door after all. I laughed nervously in front of the door. It was just a door. My thoughts surrounded a door. Maybe I should just walk in like I don't give a shit. But I do. I don't want them to look at me funny. But I have piercings, look different and speak with an accent, they'll look funny at me for sure. I could feel the blood rushing through my face. My breathing got even more frantic and I could feel the beginnings of a panic attack.

"Excuse me," a voice said. I jumped and readied myself to hit the person on the head with my board. I looked at the person and saw it was my teacher, or I assumed that the middle-aged woman was my teacher.

"I'm sorry," I breathed out, my palms sweaty. I clutched the board even tighter and she looked at me concerned and confused.

"Are you the new student?" she asked in a soft tone. Her voice sounded like she was trying to soothe a frightened animal. My breathing evened out after a minute of silence and I gulped.

"Yes. I'm Susan Crea, nice to meet you," I replied, bowing.

"Good. I'm Honda-sensei. I thought you might have been lost. Come in, so we can introduce you and then get you started in class," she said.

She opened the slidy door more, and I walked in behind her. I paused to close the door and readied myself for the stares. Turning around, I could hear the muffled voice of Honda-sensei, but was solely focused on the stares from my classmates. Their eyes were boring into me and I could feel myself getting more and more anxious. I just want this introduction to be over. Wait, what was I going to say again? Oh my god, I never rehearsed this. I'm going to die. No, I'm going to snap and kill someone. Yep, think of death and maybe I'll get calmer. I'm a ruthless mobster who can kill anyone with her bare hands. I don't have to be nervous.

"Crea-san, come and introduce yourself" someone said. I turned to see Honda-sensei looking at me with a concerned look. She had an arm out towards me, so I crossed the distance to her side. The eyes were boring into me. Most were intrigued by the new girl, but others were filled with disgust. They already didn't like me.

"Hello. I'm Susan Crea and I moved here recently from New York in America. I hope, you, um, um, take care of me," I said unsure. Didn't Japanese people say that or something? I bowed quickly and then rose to look at Honda-sensei. She smiled down at me and then turned to the room.

"You can take a seat by the wall over there. Here," she turned to her desk and picked up a stack of books, "are the books for all your classes."

"Thank you," I replied with a slight blush and my heavy accent. I feel like a kid. I didn't even get to buy my own books. Probably another threat from my father. I took the books and walked to the back of the classroom struggling to carry them all and my longboard. Walking through the aisles, I heard the other student's comments.

"She's from America? She isn't even that fashionable for being from New York," one girl muttered to her other friend.

"Isn't she a little fat? That's an American for you" another girl said across the room. She said it loud enough for me to hear and I blushed a bright red.

"We can't even talk to her, she's in the mafia," a boy said next to me. I flinched at the comment. I shouldn't worry. My gang is all I need. I don't need these people. I don't need anyone but my family, my syndicate. They just have to leave me alone and I would treat them fine. A foot suddenly appeared in front of me and I nearly tripped and dropped my books.

"_Damn fools,"_ I muttered under my breath when I passed the girl who tried to trip me. She tensed at my statement. I finally made it to my desk, leaning my long board on the wall. I sat down, placing my books under my desk. Honda-sensei started her lecture and I immediately opened the required book. Just focus on the text and they'll all disappear. But for the rest of the day, the rumors continued. Along with new rumors that I had threatened another student.

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><p>I survived the day. My classes were over and done with and I had survived. It was something of extreme pleasure and extreme pain. On one hand, I knew that I could get through this damn school and finish my education in relative peace, on the other hand, the rumors spread like wild fire. Right now I was in the restroom waiting for everyone to leave. I couldn't stand hearing those fools on the way home. As it is, if the other syndicate members hear about these rumors, they might just show up and harass people; the syndicate would probably try to come to school one day, just to see if I was making friends and all that crap. A familiar tune of the 'Pink Panther' alerted me that it was my father calling me. Grabbing my board and backpack, I answered.<p>

"_Hey pa, how's it going?"_ I asked in my familiar English. Speaking Japanese was exhausting.

"_Well,"_ he started and ended abruptly. My face hardened into a mask of rage.

"_Wait a second, let me find an empty room to talk in. I don't want anyone overhearing this conversation,"_ I spoke angrily. I knew it. I knew it. He got himself into a wedge. I barely left two weeks ago and already the family was having problems. Getting on my board, I roamed the halls. I could hear voices from most rooms this side of the wing, so I sped up. I went farther south in the building.

"_I can feel your anger through the phone,"_ my father muttered.

"_Don't start. I leave for two weeks and something has already happened. How could I not be angry?"_ I whispered angrily. Finally finding the quiet part of the building, I stopped in front of a very quiet room. Music Room 3, it is then. I pushed my board up and put my hand on the door handle. For a second that sinking feeling I felt before, overcame me and I stopped. I heard my father sigh on the other line and rage overshadowed the sinking feeling. I opened the door angrily and was surprised with what I saw.

"My, my, what do we have here?" asked a sickening sweet voice. Rose petals proceeded to hit me in the face and I swear I was choking in perfume. When I opened my eyes from the coughing fit I was having, I was shocked.

Very well dressed boys stood in front of me. They were all wearing the high school uniform, but they were very pretty. They were so pretty it was sickening. I stared wide eyed as I surveyed each of them. There was a pair of twins with flame orange hair, hanging on a small almost feminine brown haired boy around the same age. Then there was a tiny boy with blond hair and a bunny rabbit plush, sitting atop a large brunette's shoulders. The next was relatively normal in the situation and was a dark-haired with glasses which glinted evilly. The last who was moving towards me with frightening speed was a blond with blue eyes

"Hime-sama," the boy started as he appeared at my side.

"_What? Who the hell is that? Susan! Answer me,"_ my father yelled from the other side. He started to swear in Italian. I watched with a gaping mouth as the blond attempted to grab my hand with the long board. The board immediately dropped, creating a large echo in the room.

"Why I don't believe we—" the blond never finished his question. Instead when he was about to touch my hand, I merely grabbed his arm and flipped him over. Now his neck was under my sneaker and I hissed at him.

"Don't touch me," I hissed murderously. Suddenly there were two shadows surrounding me and arms went out to catch me. Merely avoiding them, I slid on the floor, grabbing my long board. I ran out the door, jumped on my board and left the room.

"_Susan, what's going on? What happened?"_ my father asked me, starting to get hysterical.

"_It was nothing. Just a bunch of weirdoes I stumbled upon. They must have been running a brothel or something and thought I was a guest,"_ I replied causally exiting the building and heading to the front gates.

"_Are you sure? If you remember what they look like, I can—"_

"_Stop it. I'm fine, now tell me what's wrong,"_ I ordered. Riding to the front gates, I saw a car waiting in the front. One of the syndicate members was waiting at the door.

"Susan-sama, how was your day?" the drive asked as he opened the door. I got my board and threw it inside the car.

"Very different. It was very, very different," I muttered while getting in. I had no idea how different my life would be.

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><p><em><strong>Hey everybody. Now if you have questions, you can totally leave it in the comments. Now, about the mafia, the vario crew, the yakuza dojin-kai, they're all real. I did not make them up. Steven Crea is a real person. Now, my OC, Susan is not. She doesn't exist anywhere but here. I'm pretty sure I'm going to make this a Kyoya x OC fanfic. If you guys have any comments, concerns, weird rants, leave me a review. I probably won't post on this story but every other week. I currently have a Naruto Fanfic going, if you want to check that one out. So, remember to follow, fave, review, obsess. <strong>_

_**(I do not own Ouran High School Host Club. The only thing I own is Susan and any other OCs that come along)**_


	2. A Test Of Honor

**Chapter Two: A Test of Honor**

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><p>"<strong>The man who passes the sentence should swing the sword. If you would take a man's life, you owe it to him to look into his eyes and hear his final words. And if you cannot bear to do that, then perhaps the man does not deserve to die."<strong>

― **George R.R. Martin, **_**A Game of Thrones**_

"**Nothing of real worth can ever be bought. Love, friendship, honour, valour, respect. All these things have to be earned."**

― **David Gemmell, **_**Shield of Thunder**_

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><p>"<em>Well, what's going on?"<em> I ask my father as I sit in the car. I watch as the car pulls away from the curb and the syndicate member kept his eyes forward.

"_I think Vito might tell you better,"_ my father says, half mumbling. I hear a voice protesting on the other side and the phone was filled with static. I wait, fiddling with my lip ring as I hear someone finally breathing on the other side.

"_Are you going to tell me or do I have to reach through the phone Vito?"_ I ask, fed up. The breathing is heavy and I could almost hear the wheels turning in his stupid head. Both I and the voice on the other side sigh at the same time.

"_Well, boss, you see—"_ Vito starts in a heavy Italian accent.

"_I am not your boss. You're boss of Vario Crew now. I'm boss of Dojin-Kai now. So don't call me boss. We're,"_ I sigh and rub my eyes, _"associates."_

"_Yah, yah. Sorry, boss,"_ Vito says, quickly swearing in Italian after his mistake. _"I mean Suzanna."_

"_Vito, I don't have all day!"_ I practically yell in the small car. Vito using his nickname for me hit a cord. It was a tender cord in my heart. It was homesickness. I was missing the rude behavior of New Yorkers. I actually missed sounds of cars honking and subway trains. I missed my family—that included stupid Vito also.

"_Sorry. Sorry. Uh, I have been having trouble with the crew. They don't wanna play in a death-"_ he starts but I interrupt him.

"_A death match? Seriously Vito? I told you to wait for a month. You can't just become boss and then make them play in a death match,_" I say angrily. Vito sure is stupid. Sometimes I wonder why he became boss after me. It was my father's decision. He made it solely on the fact that he can manipulate him.

"_Yah, I know. I know. It's just that some of our territory has been taken by that new ragtag group,"_ Vito mutters on the other side.

"_Just keep your borders straight then. You don't need to play a death match. You are far too new at this to actually win and the boys won't follow you. In addition, if they don't have all their faith in you, they won't be confident in the whole game. Don't you dare play a death match right now,"_ I tell him exasperatedly.

"_You sure about that Suzanna?"_ Vito asks. I could literally feel my father looking at him like he was an idiot. I could also feel Vito shrinking away and heard the phone being passed back to my father.

"_Well, glad you straightened that out,"_ my father says chuckling. I hear grumbling on the other side and my father yells, _"Shut up and get out of here Vito. I told you she wouldn't approve of the game."_

"_I'm glad to hear that you're checking up on Vito. I was worried when you made him boss." _

"_Well, I've been thinking that I should have just sent him with you,"_ my father grumbles unhappily. He didn't want to admit that I was right.

"_Yah right," _I snort,_ "I don't want him. He's more effort to me than he's worth." _

"_I better let you get back to your yakuza. Lord knows you need all the time you got,"_ my father says. I can feel his proud smile from the other side of the line. I smile also, and look out the window. I can feel the car start to pull into the syndicate.

"_Yah. I need a lot of help,"_ I mutter to him. The car finally comes to a stop and is in front of my new home. The driver gets out of the car, holding the door open for me. Grabbing my backpack and longboard, I climb out.

"_I love you Susan. I hope you know that,"_ my father whispers on the other side. His sadness is apparent in his voice. I feel myself frown as I stand in front of my massive house.

"_Love you too, Pa,"_ I whisper back as he hangs up. I put my phone in my pocket and sigh. It was a sigh filled with sadness.

"Susan-sama do you want me to help you with your bag?" the syndicate member asks me.

"No," I tell him and then ask, "What's your name again?"

"Fu, Susan-sama," the member replies. I take a good look at the man. His head is shaven and our emblem is on the right side of his neck. The daimon is a circle of a black sakura blossom with a sakura cutout in the middle. He wears a black yukata and has what most would say was a scary face. I was used to it, so I wasn't worried.

"Fu, I've seen you somewhere else in the syndicate. What's your duty?" I ask. I felt bad that I didn't know who he was, but there were so many faces in the move. I couldn't tell who was who any more.

"I cook the meals in the main house, Susan-sama," he replies. He gives me what would have been a terrifying smile, but it is somehow sweet.

"Oh. Thank you for picking me up Fu," I reply with a small smile.

"It is my duty, Susan-sama," Fu says blankly. He was surprised I thanked him for doing this small thing. Just because I was boss, didn't mean that I wasn't grateful. I appreciate my members. I see them as family.

"Thank you anyway," I tell him, going to walk up the stairs to the house.

The house was vast and divided into separate parts. I lived in the main house, which was the smallest in size. It was a traditional Japanese style and had a square courtyard in the middle. There was a passage which led to syndicate member's house. That house sat to the right of the property. Their house was huge with over five hundred rooms. They had no courtyard and it was almost like a maze. It was built recently to my surprise and was to be another yakuza's house. I believe the Kasanoda-gumi's took half of them out along with the police who finished them off.

Getting at the top of the stairs, I find my syndicate members lining the path to the door.

"Welcome home Susan-sama," they say together. I smile as they all bow. I couldn't get over how they actually wore formal clothing.

"Thank you. It's good to be home," I reply to them all. They stand up and I smile at them as I walk to the front door.

"Aiko," I call out, opening the door.

"Yes, Susan-sama," suddenly a man in a dark blue yukata is at my side. He is younger than most, probably in his late twenties. His black hair is gathered into a ponytail. His most defining feature is the scar over his right milky eye. I have yet to ask him how he had gotten it.

"I need to speak with you about some things. Meet me in the conference room with your brother in ten minutes," I tell him softly, entering the door.

"Understood," he replies and hurries away. I turn around and face all the men still lining the path.

"Thank you for greeting me. I hope we all have a good sleep and I will see you all tomorrow morning," I say in a stern, but almost motherly voice.

"Hai," they reply and I close the door. I sigh and breathe deeply. Kicking off my shoes and putting my house slippers on, I grab the vans and take them with me.

"Kou!" I yell when I walk down the left hall towards my room. When I almost reached the room, the room next to mine opens and a head pops through.

"Susan-sama, you're home already!" a young man says. The boy was only fifteen—or like how he tells me, nearly sixteen—and is a surprising blond.

"Kou, what did you do to your hair?" I ask, trying to contain my surprise.

"I bleached it. I wanted to make it blue, but the directions said I had to bleach it first," the boy says coming out. He wears a white—now stained with dye—shirt and black gym shorts. The boy is my personal servant in a way. He has been with the syndicate after he was dropped on their doorstep. He is too young to take over as boss and didn't want to be boss. He is much too happy and is a free spirit.

"What kind of blue?" I ask him. He went back into the room and came back a second later with a dye box in hand. I look at the color and find it a dark blue with the undertones of a weird purple.

"You like it?" he asks with a childish grin. I smile at him and ruffle his dry bleached hair.

"I think what's done is done. We can always dye it black if you hate it."

"Did you need me?" he asks looking back to his dye with a frown. He didn't like my very political answer. I smile at him and wonder how I could be so comfortable with all of these people but terrible at school.

"Yah, I need you to get me a uniform for school," I tell the boy. Kou doesn't go to school. Instead he takes care of all the house needs. He cleans the main house and runs errands. He is capable of fighting and knew how to defend himself—or so I was told.

"Is it that ugly yellow dress?" he asks. I nod and then went to my room. I drop my shoes by the side of my door and walk in. Tossing my bag onto the bed and leaning my board against the wall, I hear Kou come in.

"I'll give you some money and you'll go get some. Do you need my measurements or anything?" I ask looking at my room. It is painted a soft orange color. Against the wall across from the door sits my bed, a large queen with a dark red comforter. Along the sides of the room sits bookcases. Most are filled with crime and fantasy novels. My dresser is next to the door and a large closet is at the foot of my bed. It would be considered large to a normal person, but it isn't a huge room.

"I am not buying you that ugly dress," Kou says pointedly. I look at him and then lay on the bed.

"Alright, but I have to find a uniform," I say looking at the ceiling. The high ceiling is a crème color and I count the beams quietly.

"Was school bad?" Kou asks quickly. He sits on a shag rug in the middle of the room. It is a dark red color like my comforter and sat on cherry wooden floors.

"It was," I say bluntly. I could hear the snickers and taunts in my head. Then I remember what laid behind music room 3 and start laughing.

"Are you okay Susan-sama?" Kou asks concerned. I continue to laugh and then look at the boy.

"I think I found a bunch of male _hookers_ today," I tell the boy.

"_Hookers_?" he asks in his awkward English. "What's a _hooker_?"

"How do I say it in Japanese," I say out loud and then find the word and tell him in Japanese, "baishunpu."

"Really?" Kou asks. His dark inky eyes are as wide as saucers and he is blatantly surprised.

"Yes, really," I laugh. Kou looks at me and just stares. Then he bursts out in laughter. For a couple of seconds, only our giggling could be heard.

"That's crazy," he says after he recovered.

"Yah. I know." There was a moment of silence before I jumped out of bed. "Shit, I have to go meet Akio in the conference room."

"Well you better hurry. I'm gonna finish dyeing my hair. When you come back, we'll have dinner," Kou says excitedly.

I leave my house slippers at the foot of my bed, choosing to just run down the halls with my socks. Exiting my room, I take a right turn and run down the hall. Seeing the hall end, I make a fast right turn again, slipping on the newly washed floors. Going another five doors down, I find the conference room. Pausing and taking a deep breath in front of the door, I calm myself. After finding my inner peace, I slide open the door. 'See, slidy doors aren't so scary are they, Susan', I think to myself. Inside Aiko is sitting along with his twin brother. They are my second hand men.

Surprisingly, Hideo is exactly like his brother in every respect except for the scar. Hideo has a scar running along his left milky eye. He wears a dark red yukata with his black hair gathered into a ponytail. It was funny to me, that each of their names were kinda similar. Aiko meaning 'glorious man' and Hideo meaning 'splendid man'. It really does crack me up.

"Susan-sama," they say bowing their heads while they sat. The first time they didn't sit down until I got there. I told them it wasn't necessary to get up for me. Really, in this room I wanted them to tell me problems straight up. I wanted to feel like I was one of them in this room.

"Boys," I say and then sit down. I cross my legs and look across the table from them. "Status report."

"Sendo-kai has made movement in the southern region. They haven't been strong in Kanto since they lost their heir. But it appears that he may have left for Kasanoda-gumi," Hideo says. I nod and then wonder why their heir left. In this day and age, many leave for more honorable reasons like changes in mindset. A hundred years ago, you only left if you were being bribed. There is no honor in leaving you syndicate. I would never leave these guys.

"Is Sendo aligned with Yamaguchi?" I ask the men in front of me.

"Yes. They are the next powerful after Kasanoda," Hideo confirms. I purse my lips into a straight line. Great. If we go after them, we just might have Yamaguchi down our throats. We're going to have to run them out of the Kanto region if we want to survive. I sigh, knowing we're going to have to play a life or death game to fully eradicate them.

"What about Kasanoda?" I ask calmly. My face shows no emotion at this point. I can't let anything fall through, or else it would just freak these guys out.

"They have been crossing the lines into our district lately. They plan on eradicating us like the yakuza before us. Not only have they been stopping our drug exchanges, but they have been getting into skirmishes with our men," Aiko says gruffly. I bring my hand to my face and tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

We can't survive if we have two rivals trying to push us out. We have to deal with the one with the least experience. If we eradicate Sendo, we'll have more land to do the drug trades. Besides, the area that Sendo occupies is a really poor area. They're probably driving the neighborhood into the dirt. We can't have Kanto turned into a ghetto. For now, we have to call a truce with Kasanoda. My men aren't strong enough to play in two life and death matches. I'm lucky if I have them ready in a month's time. I'm going to have to go ask that damn Kasanoda heir for a truce—only temporary, of course. If he says no, then we're going to have to start running arms trade to survive while taking out Sendo.

"Alright. I have to go pay a visit to the Kasanoda syndicate at the end of this week. We'll start by taking out Sendo. I don't want anyone to cross over into Kasanoda territory. We have to get some more land and money before we can move onto Kasanoda," I tell the two men. They tense at me saying I need to see another yakuza, but they don't say anything. I sigh and say, "Out with it then. If you have concerns, you can voice them. That's why we have these meetings."

"I don't think we should make a truce with Kasanoda," Aiko says angrily. I look at him and wait for the veins in his head to disappear.

"Why not?" I ask.

"Because we have never needed to ask for truces before. Our men are strong and you should lead us with death matches," Hideo said softly. He was the more level-headed of the two brothers.

"I need time to train you guys for death matches. I need time to observe who I can put with who, how I can set the game up to our advantage, and time to gain your trust," I tell them.

"We do trust you. We do not need to train either!" Aiko whispers angrily. I stare at him with a bold look.

"You don't need to train?" I ask him calmly.

"No."

"Have you ever used a gun? Or are you planning on playing the games with your katanas?" I ask him slightly peaved. But I brought this on myself, asking them to be truthful with me.

"Yes, I have used a gun," he snorted out, like I was an idiot.

"Killed a man with it?" I asked him. "They aren't just to wave around civilians."

"Of course I've killed a man with a gun before," he huffed.

"At what distance? Five meters? Ten meters? Or were you right next to him where you would have to be blind and stupid not to hit him?"

"Well," he says a little unsure of himself now.

"Hideo? How about you? Have you ever killed someone with a gun?" I asked the quieter brother. He looks at me with steely eyes for humiliating his brother.

"No, Susan-sama," Hideo replies, his tone with a little bit of anger in it.

"How about martial arts? Surely everyone knows that."

"We are the best in Kanto," Aiko says, angry that I was now checking all their skills.

"Really? So if I were to fight your best fighter, he wouldn't lose," I ask a little cheeky.

"No of course not. If he does, I'll perform yubitsume for you."

I look at Aiko now with new eyes; he was willing to give up a piece of his finger because he didn't think I was strong enough. They didn't think I could really fight. I had told them before that I had killed people in the games with my bare hands. They doubted that I had the strength. I turned my chin upwards in pure disgust.

"Very well. Fetch him. Meet me at the courtyard and we'll see if your words hold," I reply, my words like knives.

When both men look at me with surprised faces, I growl. They get up quickly and run out the door. I sigh and brush a piece of hair behind my ear. Now I have to fight a large man—surely this man would be huge. God, me and my temper when people don't believe what I tell them. Did they think I was just arrogant? I get up and take off my cardigan. Going to my room, I find no one there. Grabbing a hair tie from a bookshelf, I pull my hair into a pony tail. Putting the sweater in the closet, I head out to the courtyard. Removing my socks on the patio, I find the whole syndicate there, minus Kou.

"Which one is he Aiko?" I ask the large man. Another man steps forward and I measure him to be about six feet in height and about two hundred pounds. He has a shaved head and scars are on his arms. He wears a black yukata and no shoes.

"Susan-sama, you don't have to do this," Hideo tries to reason with me. I give him a glare.

"Do you think I'm not capable? You still doubt me? I'll have your finger with your brother's for your comment." I turn to the rest of my syndicate, all their eyes staring in curiosity. I then yell out to the crowd of almost four hundred, "I am going to prove my worth to you by sparring with this man. It seems like some of you might not believe everything I have told you about myself. Therefore, let me put your minds at ease. I will show you that I am perfectly capable of leading this yakuza."

The crowd was silent for a long time after that. I turn to the twin brothers and see them worried. Their worry only angers me further. I hate when people doubt my skills. If I knew that I couldn't beat the man before me, I would have backed out already. I turn to my opponent and see him square off against me. Looking at his legs, I see he favors the right. His stance is perfect, but he protects his left side a little better than the right. That means he is faulty there, but tries to cover it up. Seeing that he's bulky I have to hit the weak spot under his chin. I'm short enough to get under there with a palm fist.

The man stares back at me and waits for my signal. I'm ready and I give him a nod of approval. The man comes at me. He's normal speed, actually a little fast for his height. I step to the side and watch at how he turns around in a second. He tries to hit me with a high kick with his left leg. I deflect and watch as he perfectly balances on the right. This left leg is the bad one. I need to get to the other side. He kicks me again, but with my analysis I was left open. I take a foot to the eye. There is definitely going to be a black eye under there. His leg is still up, not wanting to reposition with me dazed. He kicks me again, but I pass under his still raised leg and send him a jab to the gut.

He's barely fazed and I avoid his hands which go out to get me. Now on his left side, I watch as he is going to go for another kick. I kick his left leg back down. Time to hit him where it will matter, I think. I crunch my fingers and give him a hit under his chin. Dazed slightly, he tries to balance himself. I kick him on the left side he was defending so preciously earlier. He lunges forward, while I crouch down and side sweep his bad left leg. Unbalanced, he goes down. I quickly put my knee to his back and wrap my arm around his neck. With a chokehold, I watch him flail until he stops. He's unconscious and I know I have won. The crowd watches on in silence as I walk away from my opponent. I turn to Hideo and Aiko to see them with wide eyes.

"Do you have your knife?" I ask them. They look at me blankly and I turn to the crowd, "Does anyone have a knife? These men promised me their fingers."

"Here you are Susan-sama," an older man says as he brings me a knife. It looks like a ritual tanto and I take it with a smile. My right eye is already closing and I realize I have to go to school like that.

"Thank you," I say. Turning back to the twins I look at them angrily. I hand the blade to Hideo. He takes it with a worried look. "For both of your insolence, you will do penance. Know that when I say I can do something, I can do it. In addition, your men are not ready to do the things which you want them to do. If under your command, they would have been sent to their deaths a long time ago."

"We are sorry Susan-sama," Hideo says. He looks at me pleadingly one last time before taking the blade to his hand. I turn around to the crowd and let him and his brother cut off the tips of their pinky fingers.

"I say things and give orders because I don't want you to suffer," I tell the silent crowd, my accent heavy with my slight anger. I see that they took my opponent away and I continue on. "When I say that we must train, it is not because I doubt anyone's abilities. It is because I don't want you to go out there and die. Death matches will be coming. I want all of you to be prepared. For that reason, we are going to train. First we shall hone our bodies with hand to hand combat, then we shall hone our eyes with gun practice and lastly we shall hone our minds with sword fighting. Each of these activities will be supervised by both of my seconds. In addition, no one is to step on Kasanoda territory. If you have questions, you may bring your concerns to Hideo or Aiko."

"Here Susan-sama," I heard Aiko say. Turning back around, I see the bloodied blade and was handed two fingers. I look to the man and see what I should have seen in the conference room: trust. It took him giving me part of a finger for him to trust me. Looking to his brother, Hideo has the same look. I nod at each of them and then turn back to the crowd.

"If you doubt my abilities, you will meet the same fate as my seconds. Know this my syndicate, I will never lie to you. If you believe that I cannot do what I say, you may leave. Because I will always follow through with my words," I said this darkly. The men for a second looked scared, but that emotion was replaced with trust. I smiled at them and then went inside. Going to my room, Kou finally showed up.

"Susan-sama, why do you have bloody fingers in this jar? And when did you get the black eye?" he asked. I looked at him from my place on the bed.

"I like your hair," I replied. The boy's eyes glistened with joy and I watched as he ran his hands through his now blue hair. What an exciting day.

* * *

><p>The next day when I went to school, the rumors weren't any better. Like I had thought, the black eye I had only made things worse for me. But let's face it, I had to fight. I knew I would win, but I never thought that I would have gotten hurt.<p>

Listening to the teacher at the board, I hear the bell ring. Finally I get to eat something. I was starving. Fu had wanted me to eat breakfast, but I was too much in a hurry for that. Fu also said if he drove me I would have had time to eat. But as usual, I rode my longboard the twenty minutes to school.

Looking in my bag, I find the bento Fu packed me. I open it to find little hotdogs in the shapes of squid and plenty of rice. I'm gonna get tired of rice living here. Kids around me shuffle outside, but I stay in my seat. I wasn't one to go outside and eat, and everyone was avoiding me like the plague. So, I might as well stay here.

"Excuse me," a voice says from my side. It was sickeningly sweet. Wait, I heard that voice before. I shut my eyes and pray it wasn't the blond from yesterday. I pray and pray, but when I turn my head, my heart dropped.

"Um," I mumble looking at the blond-haired boy. He was too close for me to handle and I nearly punched him. He suddenly stepped away and looked at me concerned.

"What happened to your eye?" he asked. I had my bangs over most of it, but I was surprised he didn't hear about the rumors. Suddenly I saw in my line of vision, another boy. This one was the black haired boy with glasses from yesterday. I could feel my heart beat faster and my throat was choking up. This was a little too sudden. People were popping out of nowhere and they were people who were weird.

"Um, I-I-I," I stutter. The blond haired boy put his face in mine and I could feel my blood rise to my face.

"It seems like it really hurts," he says, inches away from my face. My non-black eye was wide and I gently put down the chopsticks I had in my right hand. Making it into a fist, I readied myself to hit him. A second later, he was yanked back by the brunette.

"Tamaki, you shouldn't do that to her," the brunette says to his friend. The boy then turns to me and offers a smile, "I am Kyoya Ootori. We met briefly yesterday when you stumbled into Music Room 3."

"Ah. Yah. About that brothel you're running, I swear I'll keep my mouth closed," I tell the boy hurriedly and with my extremely thick accent. I just want them to leave already.

"What!?" the blond—Tamaki I suppose—yells, "How dare you call our club a house of ill-repute! You should be ashamed of yourself."

"What is it then? It sure looked like something fishy was going on in there," I try to say calmly but it just comes out hysterical.

"It's a host club," Kyoya tells me. I look at him with what I would suppose was a dumb look. What the hell is a host club?

"Ok. I won't tell about your, urm, host club then? Okay? Now can I just eat my lunch in silence?" I ask the boys, looking down.

"But I—" the blond starts.

"Just leave me alone. Please." I keep my head down, my face red with embarrassment as I notice people are watching us. I can hear the whispers from the other students and I just pray that they leave. Somehow god hears my prayers and they walk away. I lift my head and sigh. I hope I never have to deal with them ever again.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Hey everybody. Second chapter is up faster than I had thought it would be. I finished my other story's chapter yesterday so I got this one done right away. Thank you to Hunny-Chan17 and justasislinn for the reviews. justasislinn, you sound so excited and it makes me excited. Anyway, the historical context in this applies to most things except Sendo-kai. I made Sendo-kai because (spoiler alert if you haven't finished) of Tetsuya who left to be at Kasanoda-gumi. It said that he was the next boss, but he left, so logically I made the other yakuza after his name. I plan on making Susan really close with Kou and Fu. I apologize if you guys want more Host club. They will be coming soon. In addition, when Hideo and Aiko cut off their fingers, it's only the tips of their pinkies. This is historically accurate as a form of penance for going against the boss. Susan loves her family, but she recognizes that she is boss and has to have loyalty. She doesn't want them to get hurt, but she has to have order and trust. (man was this long)<strong>_

_**I do not own Ouran High School Host Club. Most of the things are historically accurate. My OCs are Susan, Hideo, Aiko, Fu and Kou. **_


	3. I Don't Need Friends

**Chapter Three: I Don't Need Friends**

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><p>"<strong>Nobody likes being alone that much. I don't go out of my way to make friends, that's all. It just leads to disappointment. "<strong>

― **Haruki Murakami, **_**Norwegian Wood**_

"**Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival."**

― **C.S. Lewis, **_**The Four Loves**_

* * *

><p>Wednesday and Thursday went how I expected them to: horribly. The rumors somehow hadn't dwindled like I thought they would. Seems like these damn rich people have nothing more exciting to do than stare at the American who in their opinion is fat, has too many piercings, and is downright weird. I suppose my uniform didn't help to put out the flames. Instead my uniform was used as fire accelerant which promptly swallowed my entire existence.<p>

When Kou said he wasn't going to buy me that ugly yellow dress, he was completely honest. He said that not only would it clash with my skin tone but it would do nothing to bring out my 'gorgeous' eyes. Instead, he took all the money I had on hand, marched down to whatever godforsaken store he likes, and found me conspiracy in cloth.

Now my uniform consists of a black pleated skirt which goes to my knees—thank heavens—along with a white button down shirt, lavender cardigan with Ouran's emblem on the left side and black cross-over tie. My input in this whole outfit is only my black vans and black tights. So as you might guess, my uniform only brings more attention to myself. This attention has thus labeled me as the school's lesbian. I don't know where they get that from, I'm still feminine looking, and don't go around expressing my love for the female gender.

But I don't care what they say about me anymore. Labels are only skin deep. And for that matter, who cares if I'm heavier than you, have more holes in my ears, look exotic or look like I like girls? I'm not living during the thirteenth century. If I theoretically like girls so be it, but that should no longer be seen as an insult. These damn rich people should understand that not everything in this world that is different is weird. Just because they hold the power of society, doesn't make what they think is right.

So, all in all, the stares and the cat-calls from other people have led me to verbally hiss at people. Now people mainly just watch me from a distance, like I'm some new art exhibit that you sit with your tea and stare at from afar. I'm fine with that, but I know that there is someone who is following me. Growing up with people hiring hit men to put a bullet in you, you get a certain knack for knowing when someone's following you. I have a hunch who it might be, because every time I turn around there is a familiar flop of blond hair in sight.

To be honest, I don't know why they don't leave me alone. As it is, I have my own problems. Tomorrow I have to go meet with the Kasanoda boss. Then Sendo-kai has been getting on my nerves. But they'll be taken care of when my gang is ready. But my whole syndicate still needs to train and I have to observe them. If I don't know what my chess pieces can do, how am I supposed to move them across the board? So, I have my hands pretty full, so why don't they just forget about me?

As it is, it's the last period on a Friday and I'm already wondering how I'm going to pass the exam on Monday. Maybe I should go to the library for a couple of hours. That would work. I wait for the bell to ring and when it does, I sigh in relief. Rubbing the back of my neck, I can feel the ink of my tattoo. It's our emblem, but unlike the rest of the syndicate members, mine is in a blood red. I like it, it's actually very pretty.

"_Now which one should I go to?"_ I ask myself aloud, people turning to look at me. I really talk a lot to myself while at school. Most people here think I'm already crazy, why give them a reason to doubt themselves?

I grab all of my books and shove them in my bag. Kou bought me one of those black schoolbags, but I refuse to use it. Instead I zip up my Jansport backpack and grab my longboard. Really, how was I supposed to ride with a stupid pursy bag? I exit the classroom along with the throngs of people. I notice that they actually allow me to brush elbows with them now. Earlier in the week, they dared not even touch me.

Going up the stairs I can feel that Tamaki trailing me. The feeling is faint, but it's there. I shake my head in pity and then get on my board. This is normally how I lose him. I ride through the halls and go towards the west wing. It's normally quieter there. While riding, I try to reach into the outer pocket of my bag and grab my phone. While turned away, I don't notice the small brunette who's directly in my path. But when I look back it's too late.

"_Damn it,"_ I curse as I try to swerve out of the way. The boy goes to the left and I go to the right, but with the sudden sharp turn, I sail off my board. Rolling a couple of feet, I hear my board crash into the wall. The fall itself didn't really hurt, but the books which dug themselves into my back weren't so nice. I laid on my face and check if my skirt is still down, not making a move to get up.

"Are you okay?" the voice asks. I could have sworn that the voice was a girl, but I saw it was a boy. Maybe I hit my head in the fall, or maybe it's just a Japanese thing? I don't know. I can feel the person reach out to me, but I swat their hand away.

"Please don't touch me," I mutter as I get up. I can feel the rug burn on my knees and I sit up and look at them. I groan in frustration when I see my tights now have a hole in them. There is slight blood leaking from a cut, but it's quickly swallowed up in my now ripped tights.

"I'm really sorry," the feminine voice says again. I look up to see a familiar face. I stare at the brown haired, brown eyed boy, and try to place where I've seen him before.

"It's alright," I mutter, breaking eye contact. I stand, leaving my bag on the floor, and pop my back in a very unladylike fashion. The boy goes to grab my board a couple of feet away and I stare at his back. I'm actually an inch or two taller than him, and I'm only 5' 3", so he's super short. His body is that of a female girl, and from how he walks, he would be adept at wearing heels.

"I'm really sorry about that," the boy apologizes again. He turns and catches me staring. I immediately turn a dark red and grab my backpack and phone which fell out of my hand.

"Don't worry about it," I say too fast, and I'm almost certain he didn't understand. The boy, who has the figure seemingly of a girl, hands me my board with a quizzical look.

"Did your eye happen because of me?" he asks. Dumbly, I bring my hand to my bruised right eye, which is now a greenish yellow color. I shake my head and the boy stands there and stares before opening his mouth, "You're the girl from earlier this week, aren't you?"

"What?" I say, jerking my head up, my face still very red. I look at the boy and realize where I've met him. He's the one who those twins were hanging on when I opened Music Room 3. I open and close my mouth like a fish before dropping my board to the ground.

"You're the one who flipped Tamaki-senpai," the girl—because he should be considered a girl with that little muscle mass—says in wonder. I nod my head and then jump on my board and ride away. Pushing faster, I can hear the weirdo calling me. I push harder, turning down another hall.

"_These weirdoes keep popping up everywhere. I can't escape them,"_ I say hysterically in English. Riding down the halls, I make myself get lost. It would be better to get lost and not know where I am. Because that would mean weirdoes would have to get lost and we all know weirdoes are never lost. No, they pop out when you're most comfortable and you know exactly where you are.

I ride and then find that the hall is quiet. It is eerily quiet and I stop my board. Sighing, I open a door and pray I don't find people in it. To my surprise, the room is empty and there are desks skewed around. Dust is collected over most of the room and I realize that they haven't used it quite a while. Walking in, I close the door behind me and go to the furthest corner of the room. Brushing the dust away, I take out my phone and sit. I call the main house, waiting for Kou to answer.

"Heya," Kou's cheery voice says from the other side.

"Does that phone have caller ID?" I ask, wondering if he knows it was me and that's why he answered so casually. Somehow the question comes out strained and I realize that I'm breathing heavy from the whole encounter with that girlish boy.

"Susan-sama, are you okay? You sound like you just ran a marathon," Kou says, his voice filled with concern.

"I just rode fast is all," I reply.

"Oh," he says, but the tone says he isn't buying what I'm selling.

"Anyway," I try to change subject, "has Fu left?"

"No, he's heading out right now."

"Tell him to wait for two hours. I'm gonna do some studying here."

"Alright. I'll let him know."

"Uhm. You're going to have to pick up another pair of black tights."

"What?! Why?!" Kou yells. I pull the phone away from my ear and wait for him to speak normally. When there is silence on the other end of the line, I answer him.

"I fell and then when I got up, there was a hole in it," I mumble, slightly embarrassed.

"Did you get hurt?" he asks, his tone going from angry to concerned in a heartbeat.

"Naw," I say looking at the now dried up blood in my tights.

"Well," Kou says then sighs, "I guess I'll get Fu to go pick up some stuff with me. He can drive the car, then we'll go pick you up. Hideo and Aiko had to go to the marketplace anyway, so we might all come pick you up."

"Whatever works," I mutter. I open my bag and grab my books I need to study as I hear Kou yell for Fu on the other side of the line.

"I'll see you soon Susan-sama. Do you need anything in particular?"

"Naw, I'm fine."

"Good. Bye."

"Bye."

I study for the rest of the time in silence. It is actually nice studying here instead of at home. Somehow, I'm always dragged into meetings with Hideo and Aiko or I'm stuck supervising some of the men. I need to actually study. English and math are a piece of cake. My Japanese literature isn't so bad, and neither is my electives. What's getting me is Japanese history. My test is next Monday and I have yet to master the things from last week. I have to admit that if I do get a bad grade on the test, Honda-sensei would let me make it up, but I don't want that. Life doesn't give you second chances. I have to succeed in things the first time, because makeups aren't an option.

So I pack my bag ten minutes before I have to meet Kou and Fu, and head out of my new secret hide out. Pausing at the door, I look in my bag to see if I could find something to leave to signify the room. Finding a ribbon that Kou had put in my hair yesterday, I wrap it around the golden knob. The red ribbon stands out in beautiful contrast as I ride away. I actually find the exit quite easily, but the feeling that I was being followed hits me once again. I causally turn on my board and see blond mop of hair along with two patches of black with another blond and a brown patch surrounded by orange. I start hyperventilating and ride faster knowing it was the weird brothel people.

I exit the school gates and turn. Not seeing the car, I can feel my heart beat even more rapidly. Finding a place to hide, I decide to try to wait them out. Maybe the car will get here and they'll leave. A moment later I hear footsteps approaching, one pair much faster than the others. Then I steel myself and decide that this has to stop. Them bugging me is enough. I have to deal with these hookers once and for all. Leaning my board against the school gate, I wait for the first person to pass me. Grabbing the first body, I pull them towards the wall by their tie. Pinning them to the brick, I stare at that Tamaki's scared face.

"Why don't you leave me alone?" I growl out. I've finally had enough. Not even my anxiety can save them now. For a second the boy doesn't answer and I put my hand to his neck and give a forceful squeeze. I can feel the others almost on me and I squeeze harder, watching the boy's blue eyes bulge out slightly.

"Let him go," a devilish voice says.

It's low and threatening and I feel myself bare my teeth. Suddenly arms go out to get me. Letting go of Tamaki a second later, I dance out of the way. A small blond boy comes at me with a flying kick. I put my left arm up to defend and watch as a much larger boy comes at me with a punch. I have half the mind to grab and throw the small boy at this one, but instead pass under the punch with ease.

"You guys, stop it," a feminine voice says, but no one pays the voice any mind.

The small blond boy runs at me at the same time the large brunette gives me a high kick. Knowing that there's a large possibility I might get hit, I attempt to side sweep the blond thus avoiding the brunette. The blond merely jumps and redirects with a punch. Damn, I knew I would get hit with one. I watch and put my arms up in an attempt to deflect when a blur smashes into the small boy. The brunette at my back is gone, or rather he stands up.

I look to the blond and notice a head of blue and later a large ball of black fabric restrain him. Turning around, I see the large brunette is standing at gunpoint. Hideo and Akio turn to me for orders and I watch as the giant's eyes widen in disbelief and fear surge through his body. Turning back to the small blond, I see Kou holding him in a chokehold. The young blue-haired boy was looking to me for orders also. Fu comes to side and puts a hand on my shoulder. I breathe in deeply and consider the possibility of just giving a nod of my head and allowing my men to kill these hookers. If I was back in America, I might have, but I can't risk chaos with these damn rich people. They'll get their revenge for sure.

For a second, it feels like time stops. The giant boy and the small blond look at me with pleading eyes. They realize what they have done, or rather who they've done what they did to. Tamaki who I pinned is staring, his back still against the brick. Kyoya with his glasses is looking tense and I can tell behind his glasses he's scared. The twins are trying to hide the feminine boy from earlier, all the while looking like they wish they never saw me. I sigh and then turn to Hideo and Aiko.

"Disengage," I say strongly. Hideo and Aiko tense and their fingers seem to itch for the trigger, but my voice is enough of a reason to put their weapons away. I turn to Kou and see him look at me with confused eyes. I soften my face and he nods ever so slightly. He lets go of the blond boy and he falls to the ground, gasping for breath.

"Susan-sama-" Fu starts but I interrupt.

"Go to the car," I bark out. All my men freeze in place and they look reluctant to leave me. Fu's hand clenches my shoulder even tighter. I feel my face grow cold and hard as I hiss, "That's an order."

"Hai," they all reply bowing to me. They leave and I can hear the sound of a car being pulled up behind me. I turn to the brothel and see them clustered into a group, fear in their eyes.

"Why have you been following me? Don't you know who I am?" I ask them angrily. Somehow I don't know whether I should be angry that I didn't let my men kill them or that they were stupid enough to get themselves into this situation.

"The rumors are true?" the small blond asks in a feeble voice. It's a wild contrast from the demon's voice I heard earlier and I realize I broke them down.

"Even if they weren't, why were you following me?" I hiss and take a step towards the group. They collectively tense.

"Because we wanted to help you," the one name Tamaki says boldly.

"With what? Protection? I have it. Tutoring? I don't need it. Money? I can get it."

"Friends," the feminine brunette says. His large brown eyes pleading with me. I don't understand what he wants, but his words make me feel sad.

"Tch, I don't need friends," I say somehow sadly. I realize that the hardened mask I had earlier is wearing off with the conversation. In the next minute or two, I'm going to be a babbling ball of nerves.

"Everyone needs friends," the twins say in unison. I roll my eyes and walk towards them. They all tense and part like the red sea. I go to the brick wall and grab my board and backpack I dropped earlier.

"Now run along," I mutter to them walking to the car. Kou stands at the door waiting to open it.

"We want to help you," a voice says at my back. I turn and see Tamaki standing there with not an ounce of fear in his eyes.

"Aren't you scared of me? I could have very easily killed you. It probably would have been easier now that I think about it." I look to all the boys and see some amount of fear, but Tamaki stands there with only sadness in his eyes. I can't decide whether he's an idiot or one of the bravest people I've ever met.

"But you didn't kill us. You need friends and we want to help you." I stare at him with a surprised and sad face. I can feel tears threaten to overflow and I give him a sad smile. I'm broken and this life of mine is dangerous. I can't afford to have friends. I can't afford to get attached. I can't afford to live. Not if I want to make sure everyone else is safe.

"Please," I say in a quiet and almost begging voice, "if you value your lives, you'll leave me alone."

I turn my back on what I hope will be the last time I see these fools. Walking to the car, I throw my board and backpack in. Getting in, I sit between Hideo and Kou, who's closing the door. We drive off to the syndicate and the ride is quiet and sad. I feel defeated somehow. I feel like I failed the test. My men should have ended my problems there. Maybe then, I wouldn't feel this sadness in my heart. Sadness for not being able to go back to the home I love. Sadness for losing my family. Sadness for being alone, because as much as I want my syndicate to be, they'll never be my friends.

"We're here Susan-sama," Hideo says, breaking me out of my trance. I nod stiffly and climb out after him. The softer brother holds my bag and board in hand as we walk up the steps. My syndicate members line the path and I look to all of them.

"Welcome home, Susan-sama," they all chant and bow lowly. I put on a large smile, mostly for their sakes.

"Thank you. I'm glad to be home. I trust you all are training hard," I tell them. They rise and stand at their posts until I enter the house with the others. Taking my shoes off and grabbing my house slippers, I could feel Kou follow me to my room. When I arrived at my room, Kou came in and laid my board and bag at the side of the door. I immediately go to my bed and flop face first into it.

"So, they want to be your friends," Kou says after he flops onto the bed next to me. I moan and he continues, "they're those hookers you were telling me about, aren't they?"

"Uhuh," I say into the red comforter. Kou sighs and I feel him lay down next to me. I sigh and then flip over to stare at the ceiling with him.

"They don't seem all that bad. They probably don't even know you're our boss," Kou says, putting his hands behind his head.

"Yah. They seem surprised that the rumors were true."

"Are you going to do it?"

"Do what?"

"Be their friends?"

I snort and then look at Kou. Seeing his expression, he's perfectly honest. My smile falls off my face and is replaced with the pursing of my lips. Playing with my snake bites, I wonder if I could have them as friends. After today, they might not go for it. I did hold one of them at gunpoint and another in a chokehold. But even if I did, would it be wise? They might get hurt. Or worse yet, they'll sell me out and we'll have a replay of why I had to leave America.

"I don't think that's a good idea," I tell Kou with a sad voice.

"Why?" Kou asks, curiosity filling his tone.

"Because, you can't trust people who aren't your gang. Then they might get hurt. I know those fools would stick their noses in something that they shouldn't," I sigh, already dreading going back to school and seeing their faces.

"But you trusted your friends back in America," Kou argues, pouting slightly. I laugh and turn to look at the younger boy. His eyes are a dark black, but in this light they almost appear blue.

"I didn't have friends. What made you think I did?" I laugh out. Kou stares at me with a surprised look before he closes his lips into a frown. I laugh at him again.

"Of course I thought you had friends. You're not an asshole; you're pretty; you don't have any weird habits. Why didn't you have friends?" he asks in a confused tone.

"You haven't noticed?" I ask. Now it's my turn to be surprised. He shakes his head and I flip back to face the ceiling. I sigh and say, "I can't speak to strangers. I can barely hold conversations with others about the gang's business. I have major anxiety problems when I'm not with the gang. If I can't escape the situation, I'll go into a full blown panic attack. Back in America, I didn't talk to anyone because I was scared. Plus no one came up to me because I was a mob boss's daughter. So, no, I didn't have friends."

"Well, that'll work then," Kou says excitedly.

"What do you mean?" I ask. This whole day has spent all my energy. Just talking with the hookers makes me tired.

"They want to be your friends. They can help you overcome your fear of people," Kou replies and sits up. He looks at me and I can feel him bouncing up and down on the bed. My face immediately frowns.

"I can't risk them getting hurt."

"They're rich. They have bodyguards. Besides once we take out Sendo-kai, no one will bother them. Kasanoda-gumi are too honorable to go after friends of the gang. It's perfect."

"They don't want to be friends with me."

"But they do."

"No, they don't," I yell quite childishly. Kou stares at me and there's some emotion in his eyes. I look into his black orbs and the realization hits me. He feels sorry for me; pity lines his eyes. I give him a sad smile.

"Susan-sama-" Kou starts to apologize, but I interrupt him.

"I'm sorry Kou. I'm just a little tired is all. I think I'm going to go to bed. I have to wake up early to go see Kasanoda tomorrow and we don't want to look bad," I tell him. He gets off the bed, pity still in his eyes. I give a half-hearted smile, but we can both tell I'm just lying.

"Give them a chance. They seem like they're nice people," Kou tells me as he leaves the room. I nod as he looks back from the door. He closes it and I stare at my now empty room. It's suddenly too quiet and the room feels too big. I can feel tears in my eyes, but rub them hard to push them back in. My right eye flinches with the harsh contact and I almost break down.

"They all seem nice, but sometimes they aren't Kou. I hope you never understand that, because if you do, then you've felt the worst pain: betrayal."

* * *

><p>Several hours later, not in a syndicate but at the Ootori mansion, Kyoya waits for his father. Kyoya didn't know what to make out of the strange girl who wanted to be left alone. He didn't see helping her as a big treat, like Tamaki did. Rather, she would take time and money to help, and Kyoya didn't see the overall profit. She was actually a liability. If the rumors are true like she said, than she was in a yakuza. From how those men addressed her, she is pretty high in the ranks also.<p>

Kyoya thought back to today's meeting. Her men appeared out of nowhere and immediately restrained both Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai. That was no easy feat to do. But in all reality, the girl was holding her own against the two men. If she was one on one with them, surely she would have been the winner. Her training was extensive and she was fast in calculating her next move.

But what Kyoya was most fascinated by, was the look of sadness in her eyes. Those weren't the eyes of a gang member. Those were the eyes of a young girl who was in many ways, lonely. The rumors must have gotten to her, but she never looked like that in class. No, in class, she was always engulfed in whatever lecture was happening. She never looked like that with people spewing rumors.

Just then the door opened and Kyoya stood from the chair he was sitting in. His father walked in, dressed in his regular suit and tie. When he saw that Kyoya was waiting for him, he nodded his head and led his youngest son to his office. Kyoya followed his father and both entered a large office. His father took a seat behind a large desk and Kyoya sat in the chair across from him.

"What is it that you need?" Yoshio Ootori asked blatantly. Kyoya sat straight and proceeded to tell him about the incident earlier in the day. Kyoya's father stiffened and then sighed heavily.

"I tried to look at her transfer file, but nothing was even mentioned about her. It only said she was to be a second-year and gave her class schedule. Just who is Susan Crea?" Kyoya asked his father calmly. Inside he was extremely curious and wanted to know all the answers to this new girl.

"You said that she asked if you knew the rumors about her. Well, I can confirm some rumors about her. She has recently become boss of the yakuza Dojin-kai. She is wanted by the American government for racketeering, embezzlement and several counts of murder."

"Murder?" Kyoya's eyes were wide. The boy felt a thumping in his chest which was the same as earlier in the day. The girl really could have killed any one of them if she wanted. Kyoya's curiosity was not satisfied though and that's what really scared him. His curiosity scared him more than the young girl who killed with her own hands.

"Yes. The police have been asking if we could assist them. They want to get her out of here and send her back to America, but they have to charge her first. They've been trying to get an undercover cop to watch her, but she isn't taking any new gang members."

"She's smarter than we think," Kyoya mutters to himself. He pushes his glasses up and thinks of how they might actually catch the young killer.

"But, maybe," his father says and looks to Kyoya expectantly, "if we have an informant in Ouran, we can pin her down. You say that Tamaki wants to be her friend. If you make friends with her, that might give us the leverage to make a deal with the American government."

"Father, don't you think that she is far too much danger to subject a mere host club to?" Kyoya asks a little startled. He had to admit that it was a good plan. The girl would never suspect it.

"She said that she just wanted to be left alone. No girl wants to be alone though. Besides, she didn't kill you when she had the prime opportunity. This would give us a leg up with the Americans," Kyoya's father said sternly. Kyoya knew that there was no way to get around his father's order. His urge to please his father was screaming out to him. In addition, his own curiosity wouldn't allow him to not jump at the opportunity to get to know all the American's secrets.

"Very well. Susan Crea will be getting some friends very soon," Kyoya replied with a large smile and an evil glint against his glasses.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Going to write this very quickly. My computer is only at 14% and I can't find the charger. So I have written more chapters than is on here. I am currently double-checking chapter four and writing chapter five. I don't know if you guys are going to like that Kyoya is going to be a little bit of the bad guy, but he is conniving and he does always want to please his father, so it's a believable situation that he will try to get close to Susan to get dirt on her. In the next chapter, we're going to have shooting and guns and basic mafia stuff. I hope you guys like it so far. If you have questions, leave me a comment. Remember to follow, fave, review, obsess. <strong>_

_**(I do not own Ouran High School Host Club)**_

_**Finished this at 11 % booooyaaaaahhhh!**_


	4. He's Proud of Me

**Chapter Four: He's Proud of Me**

* * *

><p>"<strong>It is forbidden to kill; therefore all murderers are punished unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets."<strong>

― **Voltaire**

"**I am not proud, but I am happy; and happiness blinds, I think, more than pride."**

― **Alexandre Dumas, **_**The Count of Monte Cristo**_

* * *

><p>I woke up the next day with a roaring headache. It seems like I got absolutely no sleep. Maybe it was my because of my inner turmoil or maybe it was because I hadn't eaten anything all day yesterday, but I felt horrible. I got out of my bed, wearing nothing but some shorts and a large red t-shirt. Opening my door and going down the hall to the bathroom, I flicked the light on. It was probably five o'clock and my eyes had yet adjust to the light around me. With my eyes half closed, I turn the water to the shower on.<p>

Turning to look at myself in the mirror, I can see the stress from last night still lining my face. Although not extremely noticeable, there are bags under my eyes. My green eyes seem dull and my complexion is slightly pasty. I frown as I think of how one night of bad sleep already had me looking like I was half dead. Maybe it was the stress from attending school. Surely, the rumors had gotten to me, no matter how much I buried them.

I give my reflection a sad smile and then go on with my morning routine. Kou had said that if I was to meet with Kasanoda, I would have to wear a kimono. I really didn't care, as long as I could still shoot a gun or kick someone's face, I would be fine. I walked out of the shower with a towel wrapped around me and headed back to my room quickly. Closing the door and smiling because I actually got there without someone seeing me, I turn to my bed.

"Kou!" I squeal. The boy is sitting on my now made bed, completely dressed in black yakuza and perfect blue hair.

"You're late. We're five minutes behind schedule and I have to get you into your kimono," he says almost lazily. I stare at him in disbelief and clutch the towel tighter to my body.

"What are you doing?" I ask striding towards him. I hold my towel in one hand and grab his ear with the other. He starts to whimper as I drag him up from the bed and throw him out my bedroom door.

"I have to help you dress!" he whines as I stand at the door.

"Let me get some underwear on and figure out where to put my artillery at least. My gosh, sometimes I think you don't have any hormones at all," I scream at him. I can feel the syndicate start to wake up and the birds chirping happily.

"Well, I don't think I do," he mutters, as the door almost closes. I stop the door's progress and then look at him.

"What?" I ask him. He looks at me with a straight face and I realize it now. The boy wasn't the rage of hormones he should be at his age. I'm only a couple of years older than him, but he doesn't look at me any differently than a mother. He never expresses any sexual tension with me.

"I don't feel sexual attractions," he tells me quietly. I can feel my eyes grow soft and I look at him with a kind look. People probably don't understand him. Being different from the norm is hard and I'm not one to let him feel badly about who he is. I have anxiety and panic attacks and he accepts me. Besides, there is nothing wrong with him. I smile at him when I realize I was just staring at him for quite a long time.

"That's perfectly fine Kou," I tell him in a kind tone. The worry which entered his eyes, seems to fade and he gives me a wide smile. He tries to open the door and I laugh at him. "Just because you don't find me stimulating doesn't mean I want you to see me naked. Let me get some underwear on and I'll call you when I'm ready."

"But Susan-sama," he whines as I close the door in his face, cutting off the rest of statement. I laugh as I hear him bang his head against the door. I go get ready and put on my underwear. After that's done, I take out my holsters and lay them on the bed. I get my ankle, thigh, and double shoulder holster. I put the ankle on the inside of my left leg and thigh on my right leg. Securing them, I walk and open my closet. Moving my bagged dresses aside, I find my weapons in an alcove. I stare at my options for a long time before finally choosing.

I take out Harry who's a Smith and Wesson Model 29 .44 Magnum revolver. Harry will go in my left shoulder. He's my favorite weapon, even though he has a bad kick. Next I take out Sally who's a Sig Sauer P229 9mm. I place Sally in my thigh and make sure the safety is on. I grab my Fixation Bowie and place the foot long combat knife in my ankle holster. Next I grab my BC-41-a knuckle buster with a dagger attached-and take him and Harry to my bed.

"Kou, bring me my kimono. I have to adjust my holsters over it," I yell out. I can feel Kou come in and he holds a dark green kimono in his hands. It's beautiful and I notice the design of mountains and trees in a white at the bottom.

"Do you need any more weapons?" he asks looking to the gun and knife that lay on the bed and then to the large knife and gun on me already.

"I'm sorry, I thought you had said we were late," I say dryly. He snorts at my teasing expression and I can feel myself turn red with just being in my underwear in front of Kou. Sure he didn't really think of me that way, but that didn't make me feel any less embarrassed.

Kou came to me and smiles childishly and I realized that he was like a big kid. He motions for me to turn and I do as I'm told. He slips on an undergarment kimono and then ties it in the back. Then getting the dark green kimono, he dresses me. It feels like it takes forever and when he's done, I sigh. Going to the bed, I put on my shoulder holster. The familiar leather is somehow comforting to me. Grabbing Harry, I put him on the left side of my shoulder holster and then place my dagger on the right. Kou then dresses me with a Haori a simple white color with green stitching.

"Now let me finish your hair," he says and then makes me sit on the bed.

He pulls my hair back and I can feel him make a bun. The many piercings in my ears stick out and I wonder if I should take any of them out. Thinking that it wouldn't matter all that much if another gangster sees them, I don't take them off. I check if my neck emblem is visible and know that it is. Kou then places a silver comb with our emblem through the bun and I can feel him sigh.

"What's wrong?" I ask him when he lets me get up. I smooth out my bangs and see him looking at me with a large grin.

"I'm a magic maker," he tells me. I start to open my mouth in protest as he skips away laughing at me.

"Hey, I'm not that bad," I yell at him, following him quickly. I notice that he actually cut slits on the side of the kimono so I could walk easier. I see him go into his room and wait for him to come out. He comes out with a black Haori with our emblem on the back embroidered in white.

"Ready?" he asks me and I can make out the slight bulge in his side. He must be using a shoulder holster. I nod to him and then sees he hands me sewed green flats. I take them and put them on, minding my blade at my ankle.

"Let's get this over with," I tell him with a large smile. We walk to the front of the main house and find Fu, Hideo and Aiko there. All of my bodyguards wore the same black yakuza and black Haori with our emblem. They all have the familiar bulges with concealed weapons, but Hideo and Aiko have long katanas strapped to their left sides. They all nod to me and then we exit the house. As usual my syndicate members line the pathway, but the sun is high in the sky, the time only being 6 o'clock.

"May you return safely," they chant to me, already bowing. I stand and let them bow a little longer than normal. They have never seen me in such formal clothing and I wonder what they will think.

"Thank you. I will await your welcome when I return," I tell them with a tone of pure happiness. They all rise and when each of their eyes meet mine, I can see only approval and happiness. They smile at me and stare at my kimono. I smile back, happy that they're pleased with me. Fu disappears and I walk down the path with my seconds and my servant.

"Is Kasanoda expecting us?" I ask the twins. They give a 'hn' in reply and I can take that as a no. They didn't get a hold of him because they were too busy with Sendo-kai. Kou gives me a concerned look but I glare slightly at him and he calms himself.

I place a blank look on my face as the car finally comes around and Hideo opens the door. I get in and sit between Hideo and Aiko, Fu driving and Kou sitting shotgun. The car ride is filled with an anxious energy. The feeling isn't bad or even that negative, just curious. The ride to the Kasanoda-gumi syndicate takes some time, but before I know it, we're there. Fu drives up to a blue roofed Japanese style gate. On the side you can see the words, 'Kasanoda Syndicate', carved in wood. I play with my snake bites and then take a deep breath. Time for business.

I feel slightly anxious but I know my men are with me. I don't know if it's my bond with them that makes me feel better or if it's my sense of duty as boss. Taking another deep breath and closing my eyes, I let their strength wash over me. My anxiety is pushed down until I can no longer feel it. I open my eyes and know I'm in gangster mode. I won't have the anxiety or panic attacks I normally have. My persona is finished and change into the boss of Dojin-Kai.

Aiko, who sits at my right gets out and holds the door open for me. Kou is on the other side, lending his hand to me as I step out of the black town car. Immediately I walk up to the gates, feeling Hideo and Aiko at my sides and Kou at my back. Fu goes off to stay with the car. Going to open the door, I find that is it already creaking open and stand to the side. Out pops a young blond haired man with a broom in his hands and a bandage over his left cheek. His hair is long and his eyes are a golden color. He looks at me surprised and I look back at him with a blank face.

"Can I help you?" he says rather courageously. I can see him glance at Hideo and Aiko's katanas before looking back into my eyes. I smile sweetly and tilt my head gently.

"We're wondering if we could have an audience with your boss," I say softly with a voice of harmless girl. He stares at me surprised and I can feel his insecurity with my new approach.

"I can find out, but who are you exactly?" he asks, wary of me. He has good reason to be wary, I'm packing some heavy artillery.

"Yes, I'm Susan Crea, boss of Dojin-kai," I reply, my voice like knives now. The man looks at me with a steely look and he grips the broom tighter.

"Very well then, follow me," he says, leading us into the syndicate.

On the other side of the gate lays a traditional Japanese home. I can tell that the house that lays before us is the main house, but it is much larger than my own. It has a blue roof and a short walkway from the gate. The man then leads us past some members and I can feel them all tense with the sight of the twin's weapons. I grin and stare in front of me like they don't even matter. As a boss, I had to learn how to be arrogant and bone chilling. Most people never expect a young girl like me to be boss, so it scares them when I act like a coldblooded killer. Anyone acting like a coldblooded killer is scary actually.

The blond man took us into the house and we entered a living room and then turned to the left. He led us to what I would assume was the conference room and when we entered, he left to go get his boss. The room was simple and large. It had what looked like a dragon of black on white paper doors. At the top of the door read a sign saying, '80 years of chivalry'. I sighed and pondered sitting on one of the cushions at the table in the middle of the room. Before I got the chance to actually think about it, the door we entered, opened and in walked an older man.

"Hello," he says almost angrily. He looks at me and glares. I turn to face him fully and merely observe him in an almost bored fashion. He wore a dark blue yakuza and his hair was a graying dark brown. His eyes were a black, but were sharp in his old age. He had a small mustache on his lip that was slightly up as bared his teeth in an angry grin. I could tell that he has a gun under his yakuza and I wait with a blank look until he was done trying to intimidate me.

"Hello. I presume you are Kasanoda-san," I reply. I purposefully address him not in the most honorable honorific. He and I were technically on the same playing field, so I didn't have to act like I was below him. I watch as he comes around me, and could feel my men tense. The older man goes to the other side of the table and the blond man from earlier follows along with two other men dressed in black suits. The older man sits down and I follow in suit and sit also. Once we were seated, the rest of the men took their positions as guards and sit at our sides.

"Don't you think that three guards is a little much?" the older man asks with a smirk. He was trying to make me angry and I could feel myself want to snap at him. I keep my blank stare on and look to his men.

"If I did, then so did you," I reply blandly, looking back to him. I could see the smirk fall off from his face and I smirk in return. His face grows angry and I can tell that he has one hell of a short fuse.

"What do you want?" he hisses at me. I keep the smirk on me and then cock my head to the side.

"What no pleasantries? I thought the Japanese were supposed to be all about manners?" I ask cockily. The man looks like he's going to jump across the small table and choke me.

"I'm sorry," he says through grit teeth, "how has your day been?"

"It's been very nice so far. I hope that your day has been going well, Kasanoda-san," I reply cheekily. I can feel his bodyguards grow angry with my response. My own men in turn smirk. The older man looks at me with a death glare that would put the President in his place. I merely smile at him and await his next move.

"What are you here for Crea-san?" he replies.

"I'm here to ask for a truce."

"Why?"

"I'm new and can't afford to have two syndicates after me at the same time," I reply honestly. The glare falters for a second and what peeked through was a confused look.

"Are you planning on having a war with Sendo-kai?" he asks. He looks at me with an angry look now. He seems angry that I think I can handle them. The young blond man at the old man's side stiffens and looks to me expectantly. I glance at him and now know why he looks concerned. He's the heir. That's why he has the bandage on his cheek. Kou mentioned that he had his emblem on his face and the twins said he left for Kasanoda. I look to the blond and make my face into a creepy smile. He shudders and I turn back to the old man.

"Why are you asking? Were you planning on having a war with them yourself?"

"No."

"They you do not need to know my plans. All I need from you is a temporary truce."

"Dojin-kai has never asked for truces before," the old man mutters. Taking a side glance to Aiko, I see him look back at me. In his eyes is the trust after he gave me a piece of his finger. I turn back to the old man and see him watching me expectantly.

"Yes, but they also haven't been in Kanto before with a young American girl for a boss," I tell the old man with my blank face.

"What if I say no?" the old man asks me. I narrow my eyes and he involuntarily tenses at my slight anger. Before now it was all fun and games, but with this question he just got me too angry to control. I won't hold back anymore.

"Then that would be the wrong answer," I reply. He looks at me with a disgusted look and I go on and threaten him. "Your son attends Ouran, doesn't he? It would be a pity if something happened to him should I meet him on school grounds. I am a student there after all."

"You wouldn't—" he says, but gets cut off.

"And if that wouldn't be reason enough, I would make your syndicate burn to the ground. I am not Japanese. I do not fear losing my honor like the rest of the yakuza out there. I'm ruthless and won't hesitate to fight dirty if given the reason to. If I don't want to play with fire that day, we might play a little death match. I know that even you know of my reputation in those, so you make your decision now. Let us negotiate things and push the blood shed a little farther into the future or I swear I will make my move," I say to him darkly. My voice wasn't angry, merely full of warning and demand. The old man looks frightened but glares at me with harsh eyes.

"Very well then," he replies after a while. I look at him with a smirk and he glares back at me.

"No one is to step foot on my territory. In addition, my men will stay out of yours. We will not interfere with each other's business and we will not meet again until I revoke the truce. When that time comes, we'll see to our other terms as needed. If you violate these rules, the truce will be null and void and I will take measures to rectify the break. Do you understand me?"

"What if you were to break the truce?"

"Then you wouldn't need to worry about it," I reply while getting up. I smooth out my kimono and my men rise with me.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he asked angrily.

"If I chose to break a truce, then I would make sure that you wouldn't be around to come back at me. When I make truces, I keep my word. I never break them, and if I do, then you won't be around to rectify them," I reply darkly. The old man looks at me with a death glare and I turn my back on him. "I hope you have a good day Kasanoda-san. Our truce begins now."

"Fine," the old man says to my back and I smile largely.

My men follow me out as I lead us out of the house and onto the path outside. The syndicate members look at us with disgust and I smile darkly at them. They shrink away and I can hear the front door to the house open. Turning around, I see the blond man from before. He looks at me angrily and I can tell he wants to speak with me, but his boss already agreed to the truce. I raise my eyebrow and catch a flop of red hair behind the blond man as he closes the door. I turn back around and exit through the open gates. We go to the car and get in quietly, but when we're locked in, Fu opens his mouth.

"There's trouble in the south district. It seems like Sendo-kai has gotten a hold of some of our members and is holding them hostage in a warehouse," Fu says quietly. I can feel Hideo and Aiko's anxiety and I sigh.

"Take us home so we can drop off Susan-sama," Aiko tells Fu. I look at the man with a dirty look.

"I'm coming. I got all dressed up in my kimono and put on all my weapons. I can go with you. I just didn't look pretty for Kasanoda, Sendo-kai should see me all dolled up too," I tell him. He gives me a surprised look but it transforms into something of pride.

"Very well. Fu take us to the warehouse," he tells the bald driver. I smile and take the bun out of my hair. I replace it with a straight ponytail and put the comb in the side of my head.

"Why did you take out the bun? I worked really hard on that," Kou whines jovially. I stick my tongue out at him and hear Hideo and Aiko chuckle.

The ride to the warehouse wasn't so bad. The southern district is the one closest with Sendo Kai. Kasanoda laid to the east and took up a good portion of Kanto—around half of the entire region. Sendo-kai was a little larger than us, but it laid to the south and what most would call the ghetto. Surprisingly the warehouse wasn't in a bad area though. It was in a middle-class area, only a mile from a supermarket. We parked the car at the market and then walked the rest of the way, meeting up with the other men.

The sun was still high in the sky and it was probably only 8 o'clock in the familiar feeling of being followed hit me again when we rounded the corner of the last apartment building and were across from the warehouse. Having my men wait there, I tried to devise a plan when I could hear a set of footsteps come around the corner. They were light and by the sound of how fast they were running, was trying to catch up with something. Waiting for the person, I saw a young girl round the corner and immediately my stomach sunk.

"Susan-senpai?" the girl asks and I immediately recognize her as the feminine boy from the brothel. I could feel my stomach gather butterflies as I looked at her in a pale pink dress. She wore a clip in her hair and black tights and flats on her legs. I point my hand and look at her with a surprised face.

"You're a girl. I knew there was something fishy with you. You walked too much like a girl to be a boy," I say hysterically. Then I feel Aiko and Hideo come to my side and glare at the young girl whose name I never learned.

"Ah," the girl looks down at herself and then back at me. "Yah I am."

"Why are you here?" Hideo asks in a calm voice.

"Who are you?" Aiko says angrily. I almost waved them off, but I was wondering the same thing.

"I was following Susan-senpai because I wanted to make sure she was okay. My name is Haruhi Fujioka and I'm a first year at Ouran. We actually met yesterday," the girl—named Haruhi—says with a blunt effect. I look at her surprised and then feel Kou come to me.

"We need orders Susan-sama," he whispers into my ear and I realize we were still across from the warehouse. The hostages won't be held for much longer. I put myself back into gangster mode and turn to Kou.

"Take Haruhi home. Then go get the car and meet us in the back of this building," I order. Kou nods and then goes to Haruhi. He grabs her arm, but she tries to shake him off.

"What's going on here Senpai?" she asks me. I shake my head at her and then lift up my kimono to grab Sally from my thigh holster.

"You shouldn't have followed me. It's dangerous," I tell her removing the safety. "Kou will take care of you. I hope you live around here, because we'll need him back if things go wrong. Follow his instructions. If he says run, you run. If he says stay here, you stay there. You don't ask questions. Right now, you just so happened to stick your nose in something that you shouldn't have. But I'll get you out, just follow Kou."

"But—"

"What was that? You aren't supposed to ask questions," I tell the girl with a smirk. She frowns at me and I turn to Kou. "Be careful and hurry back."

"Of course," he replies with a smile. I nod to him and he takes Haruhi and disappears. I walk back to the group, Sally in hand. The men look a little nervous and I give them a reassuring smile.

"Alright, status report," I tell them. Fu immediately comes in front of me and the men look at him expectantly. The six foot bald man doesn't even blink.

"A group of forty Sendo-kai members dropped in on a drug trade we were doing with a large client. They attempted to take the drugs, but when our men retaliated they took them hostage and tried to torture information from them. At the moment there are at least ten men of our fifteen that are still alive. The warehouse is simple in structure and it doesn't appear that they have lookouts or snipers. None of our members have given them information yet," Fu said with a strong voice.

I nod and then look to the men. Including me, we have twenty men. Five have heavy artillery and four have sniper rifles. The others have a mix of handguns and katanas. If we use the roof and rafters to our advantage, we can have the snipers take care of our backs as the heavy artillery go in first. I look to the snipers and pair them up with some men with handguns. I breathe in deeply, closing my eyes and fiddling with my snake bites. With the calm that surrounds me, I open them and then give my men a reassuring smile.

"Alright, you with the sniper rifles are going to have our backs when we get in there. I want you four with handguns to go with them and make sure no one is on the roof or comes to take them out. Machine guns, you're going to enter before the rest of us. Be careful with them coming at you. When you see them coming after you, lead them out of the warehouse. My group will take care of the rest, while snipers take care of those inside."

"Hai," they all reply. I nod my head and the men look at me with utmost trust. My plan was solid, and the most minimal amount of casualties will result from it.

"Now, let's go get our men back. Everyone move out and be careful. I expect all of you to come home with me," I tell them in a stern voice.

They look at me one last time before we all run off to our positions. I stand behind the men with the machine guns and am surrounded my Hideo, Aiko and Fu. As much as I want to be a part of the gang, I'm the most important person. I'm boss and my bodyguards will always take care of me before fulfilling the mission. I hold Sally in my hand and wait to hear the screams of men. The rounds of snipers ring out into the quiet day. The machine guns open the doors and run it. They start firing and it's easier than shooting a barrel full of fish with a shotgun.

Soon after the men with the machine guns run out and get to the side of the doors where we're set up. The first man comes out and I can feel my men waiting for me to take the first shot. I point at him and then when he's about to turn, I pull the trigger. He immediately falls to the ground with a bullet between his eyes. The rest of the men follow for a while, but they catch on and I wave my hand for the machine gun men to take out the ones waiting on the other side of the door. A shot goes out and hits one of my men. I watch as he falls to the ground, but crawls to the side.

Angry, I step forward and shoot with the machine gun men. Bullets fly past me as I kill five people. Out of ammo, I step to the other side and grab Harry, replacing Sally in the holster. I cock the gun and step out again. The kick on this gun is worse and I empty my six rounds into another three people while walking across the opening back to where my bodyguards are. Reaching into my shoulder holster, I take Sally out and put Harry back. I take out a magazine from the right side of my holster and put the empty one back in. Just as I reload, the shooting stops. I rush in, knowing my snipers took care of all of them.

Just as I enter, a man steps out from behind a wooden beam and puts his hands up. I point Sally at him and watch as he comes in front of me. He's bloody, but only from his dead comrades. I size him up and can tell by his hands he's one of the interrogators. His knuckles are bruised and bloodied with my men's faces. I glance at the middle of the room and see fifteen of my men. Two I can tell are dead, three are wounded and the rest are alive. I sigh in relief and frustration and then glare at the enemy before me.

"Will you beg for your life?" I ask him with anger. The man looks at me with tears in his eyes.

"Of course. Please, spare me. I didn't mean any of this," he says crying out. He is pathetic and I glare even harder as he gets on his knees and comes towards me.

"Did my men beg you for their lives?" I ask him angrily. Hideo and Aiko come to my side and watch me. I watch as the man wails.

"Please, don't kill me," he chants. I take a step forward and see him stumble backwards. I'm only a couple of yards from him and I hiss.

"Did they beg you for their lives?" I roar. "It's a simple question with a yes or no answer."

"Yes," he screams out, "they did beg."

"Then what makes you any different from them? That's right. You're alive and they're dead. But we can fix that," I say angrily and pull the trigger. The man immediately blows back from the shot and I watch as blood pours out of the head wound.

"Susan-sama, what are your orders?" Hideo asks gently. I put my arm down and turn to the center of the room.

"Get the wounded into the car and take them to our doctor. I don't want to lose any more men. Send for enough cars for the rest of us and have them meet in different locations. The cops will be here soon and I don't think school would like it if I get a record."

"Very well," Hideo says and takes out his phone to make the arrangements. Aiko looks at me and nods. He then goes to the wounded at the center of the warehouse and I turn back to the man I killed in cold blood. He was begging for his life and still I killed him. But I've done this long enough that I don't feel regret anymore. He killed members of my family and I had to kill him. He didn't spare my men.

I feel a hand come to my shoulder and see Fu looking at me with proud eyes. I smile a sad smile at him and he opens his mouth.

"I'm proud to be under your command," he tells me and then walks away. My heart swells with happiness and I follow after him.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Okay, this chappie is a little earlier than I expected. I was going to make you guys wait until the weekend, but I forgot about that. Oh, and Merry belated Christmas, late Hanukkah, and on-time Kwanza. I hope everyone had a good time. Mine was a little bit of a downer, but hey, that's life. If you have any questions, leave a comment. Back to the story: Now the weapons Susan uses are all real. Sally is (I believe) the third most popular weapon in the United States, Harry is from the iconic movie Dirty Harry, the large knife is army grade and the dagger (I believe) is British and used during WWII. As for Kou, yes he is asexual. I know out there in the world, there are people who disapprove of things that are different. There are varying degrees of hate, but hate no less. I want to show that Susan is really accepting of everyone and my own views really parallel with hers. If you don't like Kou's gender, leave me a comment saying why or if you love that I'm including diversity, leave me a comment. I'll try to make him as accurate as possible, but if you have problems, leave me a comment. The point: comment what you think. <strong>_

_**So, now that that memoir is over: follow, fave, review, or/and obsess. Love you guys and thanks for everything. **_

_**(I do not own Ouran High School Host Club) **_


	5. The Door I Didn't Open

**Chapter Five: The Door I Didn't Open**

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><p><strong>"He turned away, and suddenly she thought about the old children's story, where the stupid girl opens the box that God gave her, and all the evils of the world fly out, except Hope, which stays at the bottom; and she wondered what Hope was doing in there in the first place, in with all the bad things. Then the answer came to her, and she wondered how she could've been so stupid. Hope was in there because it was evil too, probably the worst of them all, so heavy with malice and pain that it couldn't drag itself out of the opened box." <strong>  
><strong> ― K.J Parker<em>, Sharps <em>**

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><p>Today is Monday. I have to go to school. I have to chance seeing the weird hookers, who most likely will stalk me from lunch to the time I leave. I have to see that damn cross-dressing Haruhi who Kou had to take home, and who will probably come to me with a zillion questions. I have to leave my warm and comforting bed, with this upset nervous stomach and fatigued body. I have to change into my conspiracy in cloth uniform, and have everyone watch me like a hawk. I have to walk the halls and hear people whisper behind my back, and not even react because I can't go into gangster mode at school. I have to be a person. My god. I don't want to have to do anything.<p>

"Get up! You're going to be late if you want to ride your board. Actually, you should have breakfast and Fu and I can drop you off," Kou tells me. I can hear him walk across the room and can discern the opening of drapes. Light hits my closed eyes and it burns. I hiss and shuffle under the covers further.

"I don't want to go to school. Please don't make me," I whine. The covers are ripped off of me and I open my eyes in surprise. The light hits my eyes and I clench them shut.

"Don't give me that. You have a test first period today. Don't think that I don't know," Kou says motherly as he picks me up and carries me out of bed. I flail and open my eyes to slits.

"I can walk. I'm up. I'm up. I swear!" I yell as Kou walks out my door. He drops me and I hit the ground with an 'oof'. Kneeling and brushing the hair out of my eyes, I hear Kou sigh behind me. Kou pushes me forward with his foot and I have half a mind to just sprawl myself out in the hallway.

"You take your shower and I'll leave your uniform outside the door," he says pushing me down the hall as I sit on my butt. When we get to the bathroom door, he diabolically whispers, "I'll convince Fu to make you pancakes."

"Alright," I yell jumping to get up. Fu never wants to make me American food. I haven't had pancakes in almost a month.

I walk into the bathroom and start the shower. Checking myself in the mirror, I can see that my black eye has almost faded completely. The skin is yellow to the right of my eye and there's only a green bruise on the inside, but the swelling has gone down completely. I smile happily and jump in my shower. Washing my hair, I think about my men. I lost four total in the hostage situation. Sendo-kai hasn't retaliated, but I know that the other shoe has to fall soon. Kasanoda has been keeping up the truce, but it's only been two days so I can't really hold them to it.

"Hurry up!" I hear Kou yell as he bangs on the door. I finish quickly and look outside the door to find my uniform. I dress quickly, wrapping a towel around my hair, and then run down the hall to the dining area. I pass the living room and find Aiko, Hideo, Kou and Fu waiting to eat.

"Finally," Kou laughs. I pout and fix the towel around my head. Aiko looks like he's starving and the minute I sit, he stuffs a pancake into his mouth. I look at him and laugh.

"Don't choke," I tell him. The large man with a scar over his right eye, nods and continues to stuff full pancakes into his mouth. I grab two pancakes and pour my syrup over them. We eat in content silence and I can see Fu finish. He leaves and I know it's to bring the car around. I finish my pancakes and get up to go get my bag.

"I already put your bag and board by the door," Kou says as we walk into the living room. He grabs my stuff for me and I take the towel off of my head. I shake my hair and water falls onto Kou and the floor around us. He gives me a scolding look and I shake again, tossing the towel on a coat rack behind the door. He goes to open his mouth and I walk out the door.

"Have a good day at school Susan-sama. We hope you return to us safely," my bowing syndicate members chant. I look at them all and comb my hands through my hair.

"We have experienced the loss of some of our members. I want you all to be cautious. I expect you all to be here when I come back," I tell them. I can feel tears gather into my eyes as I think about losing more members. My men look up and stare back at me with sad looks. I nod to them as I pass them and head to the car.

"You think we should have a shrine for our men?" Kou asks as we walk down the stairs. I wipe away invisible tears from my eyes and look at him.

"We're going to have an engraving stone for all those lost. I want it to be on the right side of the courtyard and we'll have a flower garden around it," I tell him.

"Where did you get such a wonderful idea?" Kou asks me surprised. We walk quickly down the stairs and arrive at the car. He opens the door to the car and I get in. He gives me my backpack and board before climbing in after me.

"I had a dream about it," I muttered.

I had a dream after I came home from the hostage situation. I saw a beautiful garden with roses of all different colors. A small path which was lined by rocks led to a six foot black headstone. On it were the names of men who had died prematurely. I could remember running my fingers along the names and feeling tears stream down my face. It was beautiful and I knew that the dream was supposed to come true. That would be the only way I could somehow make up for my men being killed.

"Susan-sama, we're here," Fu tells me. I didn't know how long I had been thinking, but the ride to Ouran had been surprisingly quick.

"Thanks guys," I tell them as Kou gets out and holds the door open for me. I pull my hair into a sloppy bun, after shaking what little water was left.

I climb out and grab my board and bag. Waving to them, I ride away to my first period class. I ride and ride through the halls, kids staring at me as usual. I bite my lip rings and turn my head downwards. The whispers have seemed to cease after a week of being here but the stares are persistent. Finally getting to my classroom I enter and go to my seat in the back. Honda-sensei looks at me from the front of the room and smiles. I blush slightly and smile a small smile back at her. Class starts and the test is handed out. I look at the first question and sigh. Dropping my head to the table I mutter in English to myself.

"_I'm not going to have a good day." _

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><p>I couldn't have felt worse about myself. I had studied for that history test like it was my only chance to live and I think I failed. The bell rings signaling the end of the day and I sigh in sadness. I tried so hard on it, but I can't help but feel like I didn't do well. My whole body was already anxious because I didn't want to come to school. The glares and now the test didn't help my anxiety and I was attempting to control myself.<p>

In addition, the feeling that I was being watched only intensified after lunch. I knew that the brothel was just aching to find me. I have to leave now if I want to escape them, because if they find me I probably would have a full blown out panic attack. I grab my board and put my backpack on my back. Running out the door I can feel them running after. If I could just get away from them. I can't deal with them today. I can't do it. I can't pretend that I'm okay and that people don't make me nervous. I'll have a panic attack for sure if they catch me and I don't want them to see me like that.

Only the sounds of footsteps could be heard as I run towards the empty west wing. Running up the stairs, I drop my board and jump on. I was riding so fast my hair was blowing back and I could no longer hear the footsteps following me. I sighed and slowed down a tiny bit. I turned the corner and just when I think I'm free, I see people blocking my path. Of course, I didn't slow down enough and now I'm sailing off my board while trying to avoid them. I fall off, my board continuing its path and my bag sailing off my shoulders, and roll past them. When I stop rolling I stare at the ceiling, laid out on my back, and feel like I want to scream. I wish I had Sally in my thigh holster.

"Are you okay?" a feminine voice asks. I look up and see Haruhi in my line of vision. Her brown eyes are lined with concern and I can see her hands go out to help me up.

"Please don't touch me," I say as I wave her off. She steps back and looks at another person. Looking to the right I see Tamaki and Kyoya. I stare up at them and start to hyperventilate with the sudden appearance of people.

"Boss, did you," one voice starts.

"Catch her?" another finishes. The twins with orange hair say looking at me from above my head.

"Did you hurt her Tamaki-kun?" the little blond says from my feet with the giant standing guard.

I could feel myself hyperventilate and then start to shake. My eyes were wide with what I could only tell was fear. I didn't know if I should get up or if I should play dead. Maybe if I lie here, they would all disappear. They have club duties to attend to and should be leaving. If I just lay here, they should leave. But what if they don't. What if they just stand there or worse yet lay down with me because they thought I wanted company. I laugh nervously. Would they lie with me and just forget the world? I'm so funny.

"I think we broke her," Tamaki says coming awfully close to my face. I stare at him with wide eyes and can feel my hand make a fist. Just as I was going to make sweet sweet contact with his pretty face, he was yanked back.

"Tamaki don't do that to her," Kyoya says from behind him. I sit up quickly and the group looks scared that I actually moved. Still sitting I shuffle on my butt away from them, but I hit a wall and know that my attempt of escaping failed. I feel my heart pound within my chest and can swear I'll have a heart attack any moment.

"Please leave me alone," I tell them. They gaze at me with wide and surprised eyes. I pull my legs into my chest and bury my head into my knees. If I can't see them they're not there. They'll get tired of me and they'll leave me alone. I start to feel my palms grow sweaty and my breathing is starting to choke up.

"Are you okay?" a pair of voices say and I chose to ignore them.

"_Go away. Go away. Go away,"_ I chant to myself in English and choke on my own words.

"Guys can you leave us alone," a feminine voice asks. I start to cough and wheeze. My mind only chants, 'go away, go away, go away'. My head starts to feel light but dizzy at the same time. Maybe I'm dying. Maybe that's better than what I'm dealing with now.

"We're not leaving you alone with her! No! She might have guns or knives or might kill you," a voice says in protest.

"Look at her. You're scaring her. I'll be fine. She did save me," the girl mutters. The shuffling of feet is heard and I can feel tears of pain gather in my eyes. I can't let myself cry. I can't let them see me as weak. They just have to leave me alone and I'll be fine.

"Go away. Please just leave me alone," I tell Haruhi. No, I beg the young girl. I could feel her uncertainty but she doesn't leave. Instead, I can feel her hand touch my back. I gasp and begin to shuffle away from her. The girl instead wraps her arms around me and pulls me into her. I sit more still than any stone ever could and hope I pass out.

"You're okay. I won't hurt you," Haruhi chants after we sit there for several minutes. I laugh and raise my head.

"Why do you guys not leave me alone? All I want is to be left alone and you guys can't leave me alone. I can't handle this. I can't handle any of this," I tell Haruhi with a hysterical voice. My voice is shaking and this no longer feels real.

Haruhi stays quiet and I can feel myself begin my downward slope to calm. The shaking finally stops and I stretch my legs out. Trying to breathe in deeply, I wheeze but don't stop breathing in. I push Haruhi away and try to stand. I stumble and kneel on the cold marble floor. I look at my reflection in the white floor and see my scared face. My hair is all over the place and falling out of my bun. My complexion is sweaty and pasty. My breathing evens out as I stare at myself and I stand up. I walk to get my bag and board.

"Are you okay?" she asks me. I nod my head and can finally feel my heart even out. I look up to her and know I won't have another panic attack today. If I do, I'll just pass out from exhaustion. As it is, I feel like I just ran a five mile marathon after skydiving. My anxiety will plateau for a while and I know that I can talk with her now. I have only a little bit of time though.

"I'll be fine. Now, what do you want? Tell me quickly before I revert," I order to her.

"Revert?" the girl asks with a confused look.

"What do you want?" I ask exasperatedly. I watch as the other members of the brothel come out of a room. I back away from them like a skittish animal.

"It's okay. We only want to talk," Haruhi tells me, putting her hands out.

"About what?" I ask.

"We can't talk about it in the open. Please come into the room and we'll talk there," Kyoya says. I look at him with a raised eyebrow. No ulterior motives line his eyes and I nod my head gently.

"Okay. But we have to hurry," I tell the raven haired boy. He inclined his head to the door and I walk through. I'm surprised to see that the room is empty and free of dust. I can feel my heartbeat start to race once again. We don't have much time.

"Haruhi told us you know her little secret," the twins say in unison. I nod my head.

"What were you doing on Saturday?" Kyoya asks me, his eyes seeming like they grew three shades darker. This question holds ulterior motives; his eyes scream evil. I narrow my eyes and look back at him.

"That's none of your business," I tell him in a blunt tone.

"Will you tell?" Tamaki asks me, coming into my face again. I clutch my board and bring it around to hit him on the head. The dumb blonde is yanked back by the giant and the small blond looks at me with a dark glare.

"Your friends aren't here to help you this time. We will not have you hurting anyone tonight," the small boy says.

"You keep him on a leash then," I hiss angrily. The blond flinches with my harsh tone and I turn to see the giant at his side.

"Guys stop it," Haruhi says. I stare at the small blond and giant a second more before taking a step back. My palms are beginning to sweat. I have used my courage half way through.

"Get on with it. I don't have much time," I say looking to Haruhi. Her eyes slightly widen in what I hope is understanding. She opens her mouth but it is Kyoya who speaks.

"Haruhi is posing as a boy for certain circumstances," he tells me, an evil glint in his glasses.

"I don't care if she even did it for fun. People should get over themselves and not judge others by what they want the norm to be. If she wants to be a boy, let her. She is still Haruhi, no matter how she dresses or what gender she likes," I say quickly. The others look at me with surprised looks and Haruhi smiles at me.

"Thank you."

"No problem. It's only common courtesy."

"Well, there is a problem with you telling oth-" Kyoya starts.

"I won't tell if Haruhi doesn't want me to. Besides I don't talk to anyone so I'm the ideal person to know a secret," I tell them. Haruhi nods and I continue, "I promise I won't tell then."

"Good," Kyoya says. I nod and then go towards the door to leave. My heart begins to slow back down, calm coming over me knowing that this is over.

"Wait," Tamaki yells.

I hold the door handle in my hand and weigh my options. I could turn it and leave for what I would hope was forever. Or I can turn around and deal with them. If I stop now though, there's no counting that I could ever escape again. Fight or flight? Which should I choose? I wonder what would happen if I chose to stay. Would I be happy? I would finally have friends. I could finally be happy. I wouldn't be lonely. But if I stay, they can always turn on me. I'm scared of them as much as I am lonely. I guess this is what Tennyson said, 'tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.' But is it really true?

"You want something? Can't I just leave?" I ask helplessly still facing towards the door. I'm still trying to make up my mind if I should leave them forever or open this can of worms. Will I be Pandora and open the box? Will I possibly unleash havoc on myself?

"We want to help you," the happy voice says. Listening to his voice, I notice an underlying tone to it. It appears happy, carefree, but underneath it all is a seriousness. Maybe even a seriousness because of pain. I realize it now. He's nice because he can't stand for others to be hurt. He's experienced being alone. That's why he wants to help me. But he found people. He's no longer lonely. I can be like him. But I'm not like him now. I'm a mob boss. I'm a coldblooded killer. I'm not normal.

"With what?" I ask, closing my eyes. I don't know if I can turn the handle. I don't think I can leave anymore. I've missed my chance. My courage is gone.

"We want to be your friends. No one deserves to be treated like you. No one should be alone," he says. I can feel the sadness in his voice. Again I'm questioning if I think that Tamaki is either the most stupid or courageous boy I've ever met.

"I can't have friends," I say, my hand falling off the golden knob. I've lost. I have just turned into the person they want to help. My mind just made up that I want to be saved. Maybe it always did, but there was no one there to help me.

"Of course you can," he laughs. I turn and look at him. The whole brothel looks back at me and I shiver inside. I can't have them as friends. I can't learn to trust anymore. But I don't want to be lonely. That's all I've ever been and now I'm realizing that I can no longer live like this. My anxiety is there to save me as an excuse for being alone. I'm alone because I can't talk to people. That's a lie. I can't talk to people because I don't want to feel like I'm alone.

"You'll see that I can't," I tell them and then walk out of the room. I don't tell them to leave me alone. I've lost. I think I'm going to regret not having walked out of that room sooner. I'm going to regret allowing them to think that they can be my friends. I'm going to regret this day. I'm going to regret being Pandora. I'm going to regret never opening that door that day.

Leaving, I know I have to get away from these fools. I go through the hall and turn around the corner. I'm so tired. My panic attacks really wear me out. I can't walk anymore and I can feel myself lean against the wall. Maybe I should call Kou. He'll come get me, but it'll be a while until he actually finds me. I take deep breaths and try to walk. If I had left those fools earlier, I might have had the strength to make it to the front. Fu is probably worried. I gather the last of my strength and walk through the halls.

I find the stairs and try to walk down them. I breathe in deeply after getting halfway down. My legs are trembling and my head is starting to spin. If I pass out on these stairs, there's the large possibility that I can fall and break my neck. I lower myself down using the railing and sit there on the stairs. I can feel my legs cramp like they're going to have a muscle spasm. Grabbing my hair in my hands, I pull it back into bun and tuck a loose strand behind my ear.

"Do you need some help?" a cold voice says. I look down at my feet and can feel myself blush. I've heard that voice before, and not too long ago at that.

"I don't know," I mutter and then look up at Kyoya. The raven-haired boy looks down at me from my right side.

"Well do you plan on sitting here until classes tomorrow?" he asks me, his tone lined with humor. I glance back down at my legs and will them to move. I pull myself up with the railing and then look to Kyoya. He stares at me, observing me like a hawk.

"Very funny," I mutter, feeling myself turning red under his gaze. I walk down, slowly but surely. Kyoya follows me on every step, watching like a cold shadow. When I finally get to the bottom, I sigh in both happiness and exhaustion. But my happiness is cut short when my legs finally buckle and I can feel myself go down, my longboard clanging to the ground. I don't hit the floor to my surprise. Instead I open my eyes and find I'm being held by longer arms.

"Would you like my help now?" Kyoya asks, pulling me up. He left arm is wrapped all the way around my waist. I somehow feel short next to him, and he isn't that tall of a guy. He picks up my longboard while still holding me as I try to make sense of the situation.

"I don't like being touched," I say with a gasp as he pulls me forward. His arm is searing into my skin through my clothes. He isn't even doing anything terrible, but I want to shake off his arm and slap the crap out of him. I can feel myself turn a scarlet color and I try to move faster with him holding me.

I see Kyoya's face out of the corner of my eye. He is peering at me in both curiosity and judgment. I know that he is going to tell me I'm an idiot for not wanting help. Then, he'll probably go on a spiel of how everyone needs help or something. Lastly he'll scold me for trying to walk down to the front by myself when I know I'm this tired. He opens his mouth to say something along those line when my phone rings. The pink panther ring tone saves me. I pull my phone out of my bag with Kyoya holding me.

"_Hey pa. How are you doing?"_ I ask in my familiar English accent. I feel the relief of speaking in my native tongue.

"_Susan, you sound terrible,"_ my father exclaims on the other side. I sigh and glance at Kyoya. He tries to appear like he's not listening, but we both know it's quite evident he is eavesdropping.

"_Yah. I had one at school,"_ I say into the phone. My father knows about my attacks and anxiety. I can almost hear my father's eyes widen in realization.

"_Oh. Can you make it to the car?"_ my father asks. Kyoya's arm tightens around me and I gasp_. "Are you okay? Is there someone with you? A member?" _

"_Not quite,"_ I mutter and try to shake Kyoya off. The boy just further tightens his arm. I shiver at the contact. I am beginning to hate the raven haired boy. He's worse than Tamaki. But at this moment, I might be very biased.

"_What does that mean? Are you okay? Is it like the first match we had?"_ he asks. My father is subtly trying to see if I'm being held hostage. The question refers to the first death match where I got held hostage.

"_Don't be silly. I'm much older and that wouldn't happen again," _I say jovially. I can feel a smile come to my face. Homesickness wracks my soul and I can't help but smile when I hear my father's voice.

"_I just want to make sure. That was only two years ago and sometimes you're a bit spacey,"_ he laughs out. His heavy New York accent feels like home and I stop my legs. Kyoya looks at me with a blank look. He then turns and stares forward as I feel my throat close with sadness.

"_Hey pa, I'll call you back. I'm with an outsider,"_ I tell my father. I can hear his gruff grunt at him realizing I'm not with a member.

"_Alright. When you get home, if you aren't too tired, you give me a call. If you just crash like you normally do, I'll call you tomorrow,"_ my father tells me. I begin to walk again, knowing that I was already half way to the car.

"_Of course pa." _

"_I love you Susan." _

"_I love you too pa."_ I hang the phone up and push back tears. I put my phone into the pocket in my waistband and turn to Kyoya. He is staring at me once again and the scarlet color of my face returns. I can feel my heart try to start to beat hard, but it's too tired. Overall, I'm just too tired.

"You miss him," Kyoya states as he looks back forward. I don't answer him, knowing it wasn't a question. Kyoya knows that my father misses me and that I miss him.

"Are you planning on walking me to my car?" I ask him, attempting to change the subject and watching my feet. My legs barely move any amount and I can tell that Kyoya is just dragging me along now. As much as I hated to admit it, I don't think I would be able to get to the car by myself. I don't want to be somehow indebted to this boy.

"Do you plan on walking there yourself?" he retorts with a smirk that said I couldn't do it. I stop and grind my feet into the marble floor. I glare at the boy through my red face. That did it. Kyoya making me angry finally gave me the strength to walk.

"Let me go," I order him. Kyoya looks at me and then raises a perfectly shaped eyebrow. How can he have a perfect arch? Do these rich people have personal hairstylists? Oh my god. They do, don't they? If smoke could come out of my ears, it would be. My whole head felt hot and I felt incredibly embarrassed.

"I don't think that would be wise," he replies. I can feel my embarrassment fade and I'm only left with anger.

"Please let me go," I hiss out. Kyoya nods his head and gives me a look that said, 'you're going to regret this'. Kyoya's arm that was burning my waist immediately fled from my body. I stood up on my two feet and then motioned for Kyoya to give me my board. He hands it to me and I lean against it.

"You don't like people helping you very much," he says blandly. I start to walk away from him. I couldn't tell if I was more embarrassed, more angry, or more tired. It was a real toss-up.

"No," I hiss and then start to walk faster. I exited the front doors and was outside. Only the long path to the gates now. That is all I need. I just need to get to Kou. He was probably planning on coming to get me.

"You also don't trust people," the cold voice says. That's it, I really think he's the worst in the brothel. Haruhi at this time, I believe, is the best.

"No," I say bluntly. I stumble slightly but then recover. "Do you have to follow me? I'll be fine. I can see the gates."

"And if you should fall now, Tamaki would be very angry at me," Kyoya replies. I can feel myself go red at the thought of them worrying about me. I start to walk faster and I clutch my board tighter as I see Kou in the distance. Kou sees me with Kyoya and starts to run towards us. I can see that he has his hand in his yakuza on his gun. Why do people always think I'm a hostage? Do I really look that defenseless?

"Susan-sama," Kou says as he stands in front of me. He glances at Kyoya and I can feel Kou's anxiety.

"It's alright Kou. Help me to the car," I tell the boy. He takes my board that I was leaning on and replaces himself as my crutch.

"What happened?" he whispers in my ear. I side glance at him and give him a reassuring smile.

"Kyoya, thank you for helping me. I hope you have a good rest of the day," I say angrily to Kyoya as we walk away.

"Yes. I hope you feel better. I will see you tomorrow," his voice calls out to me.

I nod and can feel the tips of my ears red with embarrassment, my anger fading. Did I really had to be helped to the car? Did he really walk with his arm around my waist through most of the school? Oh my god, what if someone saw? The rumors are going to skyrocket. They aren't just going to skyrocket, they're going to fricken light speed it out of here. Kou and I manage to get into the car and it is a second before Kou lets out his hysteria.

"What happened? Are you okay? Was it poison? Do you have a sample? Or were you stabbed? I didn't see blood? Oh my god what if you have cancer?" he goes million miles an hour. I sigh and look at Fu. Fu looks back at me through the rear view mirror. I can see his scared wide eyes and I put my finger to Kou's lips to silence him.

"I'm fine, just really tired. I hadn't been feeling well since this morning. I didn't sleep well last night and I've been a little stressed with my test. I really didn't feel well this morning, so nothing is wrong really," I lie to them. It's not really a lie, but I don't want to tell Fu about my anxiety problems. Kou looks at me and knows I'm lying, I pull my finger away and put them to my lips. He nods acknowledging that he should keep his mouth closed.

"Well, maybe you should stay home tomorrow," Fu tells me as we drive off. We drive for a small while and watch as we pass houses and apartments.

"Can you make me soup?" I ask Fu in a quiet voice.

"Miso soup?"

"Chicken and rice?"

"Alright. I'll get started on it when we get home."

"Thank you."

The car stops in front of the syndicate and Kou gets out and holds the door open for me. He gives me his hand and I pull myself out of the car. Walking up the stairs, I start cursing the architect who made so many of them. Before we get to the top, I pull myself off of Kou and do the rest myself. I don't want to worry any of my members. A sick boss is sometimes worse than no boss at all. Your whole gang would get hysterical if they think you're sick.

"Welcome home Susan-sama."

"It's good to be home."

I walk the rest of the way with a fake smile on my face. The only one who would notice it would be Kou. Hideo, Aiko, and Fu would know something was wrong, but they wouldn't ask me. When we get into the house, Kou catches before I can fall. He places my board he was holding next to the front door. Then he picks me up and hurries to my room. He can tell that I don't want anyone to know I'm this dead tired. I close my eyes for a second and I open them to see I'm in my room. Kou puts me under the blankets and I can feel his questioning gaze on me. I look at him and nod, telling him he can ask me what happened.

"So—"

"I had a panic attack. They wear me out. Kyoya found me on the steps and helped me out of the school," I tell him before he could barrage me with questions.

"What triggered it?" Kou asks, now worried.

"The brothel," I say, slightly angry.

"What did they want?" Kou says, his voice hopeful. I look at him and see him smiling with joy.

"They wanted to be friends," I groan exasperatedly and turn away.

"Did you say yes?" Kou asks expectantly. He really did want me to be happy. But happy isn't something I think I can be.

"I told them that I can't make friends," I say, closing my eyes. I can't stay awake anymore.

"So you said no?" Kou asks confused as I feel darkness overwhelm me. But before I enter sleep, I can feel myself mutter one last statement.

"No, I just didn't open the door."

* * *

><p><em><strong>New Chappie for the new year! Yay! Will the Susan's hope for friends be crushed? Or will Kyoya betray her? Or will she be something to Kyoya he never really expected? I am answering these questions, but they won't be answered for a while. The title is a parallel to the episode 20 of the anime named "The door the twins opened". Because Susan like the twins, has always been alone. The twins had each other and Susan had her gang, but they all were quite lonely. Susan does want friends, because she can't survive anymore by being alone. But unlike the twins who the club needed more than they needed the club, Susan needs the club more than the club needs her. But I can't help the nagging feeling that Susan will have to be betrayed by Kyoya. I know it's harsh, but I feel like I have to torture Susan. I'm sorry. In addition, this is the longest chappie and I changed the story from drama to friendship. Do you think it should be changed? I think we're going to focus on the friendship more often now. And same guestie, don't fear, the Host club will appear more often. Oh, and Happy New Year! May 2015 treat us all well!<br>**_

_**Anyways, remember to follow, fave, review, and obsess. (I do not own Ouran High School Host Club)**_


	6. I'm Not Prepared

**Chapter Six: I'm Not Prepared**

* * *

><p>"<strong>Spectacular achievement is always preceded by unspectacular preparation."<strong>

― **Robert H. Schuller**

**But we're talking kings and successions, **

**Even you can't be caught unawares. **

**So prepare for a chance of a lifetime;**

**Be prepared for sensational news. **

**-"Be Prepared" from the **_**Lion King**_

* * *

><p>"Kou, I'll be fine. Now please let me out," I moan. I'm currently in my uniform, my backpack on my back, and am clutching my longboard to my chest. Kou is blocking the door and Fu is sitting in one of the living room chairs listening to the whole ordeal.<p>

"No," Kou says with a pout. I can feel my eyes widen at being told no.

"I can't miss anymore school. You didn't let me go to school yesterday and I can't afford to get farther behind in my classes. I need to see what my test is too. I **need** to see it!" I yell and then try to glare at the younger boy. I fail because he is just too cute with his uncombed blue hair and too large sleeping shirt and gym shorts. He didn't wake up early because he told me I wasn't going to school.

"No," he replies again with a pout. I frown and try to give him puppy eyes. I am the boss of this yakuza, I shouldn't have to do puppy eyes to leave my own syndicate. The blue haired boy looks at me with a pout and averts his eyes. I lose my puppy eyes and have an exasperated look on my face.

"Kou, for goodness sakes, I'm fine. You're being unreasonable. Isn't he Fu?" I ask, trying a different approach. I look at Fu who is sitting in my favorite chair, reading the morning paper. The older man looks up from his paper and sighs at me. He seems to be preparing for my reaction and I'm slightly concerned with this.

"I would like it if you stayed home one more day," he mutters and then pulls his paper up to protect himself.

"You traitor! You're both being childish. I am going to school even if I sneak out from the bathroom window," I tell them slightly angry. I know they're trying to do what's best for me, but I have to leave now. If not, I would have to get a ride to make in time for class. And I know that that they aren't going to give me a ride. I glare angrily at Kou but somehow feel like I should have been ready for this though.

"You wouldn't dare!" Kou squeals. I look at him and gently raise one eyebrow. Within his sleepy eyes, I can see his worry. He looks at the floor and gently bites his lower lip, thinking about what he should do.

"Kou, you can't worry about me so much. I will be fine. I actually have a weapon on me, so I can defend myself and threaten the brothel. Besides, they'll probably try to corner me but I'll wait them out and escape," I say reassuringly as I pat my right thigh.

My skirt mostly hid Sally, but it wouldn't matter if anyone knew. The twins had cleared it with the principal. Even though I'm pretty sure that it was my father's threatening that allowed me to carry weapons on campus if I concealed them. Kou looks back up at me and frowns. I smile and tilt my head a little bit. Kou looks at me and then moves aside. He smiles a small and worried smile back at me.

"We're coming to pick you up. If you are a second late or if you don't answer your phone, I'm going to look into homeschooling you," he threatens with a serious look. And here I thought he wanted me to have friends. I must have looked terrible if he is this worried about me.

"I'll call you if I'm running late. See you guys," I tell them as I open the door and run away from the house.

If they change their minds, I want to be far, far away from them. My syndicate members don't actually line the path today. They were told I wouldn't be leaving the house, but I guess they're wrong. I run down the path and take the stairs two at a time. Getting at the bottom, I jump on my board and ride down the hill fast. The main reason why Fu always picks me up is because I don't want to ride up the hill. My hair flies back and I grab it quickly in my hands. Pulling a tie around it, I make a sloppy ponytail. My hair is actually too long right now, but I think I'll grow it out a little more. Maybe it'll hide my ears. But then again it doesn't now and that's only because I put my hair behind my ears so often.

Turning at a stoplight, I notice how barren the street is. Now that I think about it, the border between my district and Sendo-kai is only fifteen minutes away. I'm reminded of the warehouse and realize that Aiko and Hideo are doing another trade there today. I hope they're alright, though I know that if anything goes wrong they can handle it. Maybe I should go that route just to check and see if the area is actually secure. They probably have a perimeter set up. Making a turn I don't normally take, I start to fiddle with my lip ring. Looking at the street, it looks somewhat familiar as I pass a large apartment complex.

"Susan-senpai?" a voice calls out. I come to a screeching halt. No, this can't happen this early in the morning. It's not supposed to happen this early in the morning. I can't deal with them this early in the morning. I'm not prepared!

"Yes," I reply, not looking back. I can feel my palms start to sweat. Maybe I should have stayed home.

"What are you doing on this side of town Senpai?" asked Haruhi as she comes in front of me. I sigh and look at her with a nervous smile.

"_I'm okay. Just be nice and courteous. She is the best one out of the brothel and I can use friends. I can make friends with her. I just have to be nice and not hyperventilate,"_ I say quietly with a heavy accent in English. The whole piece comes out scared and hysterically. Haruhi hears the whole monologue and just waits for my rapid breathing to cease. She waits almost a full minute before I can breathe without wheezing.

"I'm sorry to scare you Susan-senpai," she says with a kind smile. She truly is trying not to freak me out. I can feel my heart slow down, but my hands are still sweaty. I kick my board up while fiddling with my backpack.

"You don't scare me. I'm just bad with people," I mutter to her. She smiles and I gather my courage and ask, "You live around here?"

"Yep. This is my apartment complex right here," she says and points to the large complex on this side of the street. I would have never known she lived so close to me had I never changed my route. Damn it. I have the worst luck ever.

"Oh. I live up that way," I say and point back where I came from. Better to be vague. I don't want her coming to the syndicate anyways. I clutch my longboard and start walking past her. She gets the idea and then comes to my side. I pray we walk in silence, but Haruhi has a different idea.

"You really can't talk to people can you?" she asks. I shake my head in conformation and have half the mind to jump on my board and leave her. "You had a panic attack on Monday. You looked really tired when you left and you didn't show up at school yesterday. Everyone was really worried."

I sigh and feel my whole face turn red. They were worried? But they barely know me. Sometimes I think that they don't feel worry but feel angry that they don't have their play-thing. There can't be people who automatically worry about strangers. Those people don't exist. No, people take time to trust and even at that, you can trust the wrong person. I'm taking a gamble on the brothel, but I'm desperate. I don't have any friends. I have to at least make an attempt. Right? Uh, maybe not right.

"I was sick," I reply, my voice hoarse with force. I'm truly forcing myself to speak.

"Were you sick and that's why you had the panic attack? Or did you have the panic attack and that caused you to be sick?" Haruhi asked as we rounded another corner. I take a deep breath and stop my walking. I don't think I can deal with her much longer. As nice as she is, my chest is constricting painfully.

"Second one," I reply when Haruhi turns around. I gather my courage and decide to end our meeting. "I can't spend too much time with you right now. People make me nervous and my panic attacks make me sick. It's not because I don't like you or that I'm rude but it's because I can't deal with it. So, I'm going to leave and maybe we'll talk again."

"But, senpai," Haruhi starts as I drop my board to the ground.

I ride off before she could tell me anything else. I really can't deal with her this early in the morning. I'm actually surprised I said so many words. I ride faster to school and tuck a piece of hair behind my ear. My heart slows down and I can breathe easier. Maybe I'm actually making some progress with my social skills. We'll find out with the rest of the brothel. I only hope I don't have another attack.

* * *

><p>I got my test back. I actually didn't do badly. Scratch that, I actually aced it. Ever since Honda-sensei gave it back to me, I've been staring at it in disbelief. If I wasn't a mob boss and if Honda-sensei didn't like me as much as she did, I would have expected her to ask me if I cheated. We both know that I didn't. So I've been sitting here with my test in front of me, trying to see if this is really a dream or not. The bell rings and I know that it's lunch time. I should have been prepared for the brothel to bug me, but I was much too content with myself to actually remember them.<p>

"Excuse me," says a sweet voice. I can feel my body grow cold. I should have been prepared.

"What do you want?" I ask Tamaki, not bothering to look at him. I mutter in English, _"I was too happy. I wasn't on guard."_

"We were just wondering if you wanted to come eat lunch with us," he replies. This time I turn and look at him with suspicious eyes and a red face. His blue eyes bore back into me and I can feel my heart start to beat in panic. I look down at my lap and bring a hand to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Is it going to be all of you?" I ask.

I hope that he doesn't jump to the conclusion that I will say yes if it's everyone. I won't do that so I brace myself in case he decides to yank me up or come into my face. When he doesn't reply and silence fills the air, I look up confused. I actually hope that he already left. Instead I find him staring at my test with wide eyes. Kyoya comes up behind him and I scowl at the raven haired boy. He just pushes his glasses up in what I think is a challenge.

"You got a perfect score?" Tamaki breathes out in a terrified voice. I look at him and feel my face contort into a curious look.

"Yah. Doesn't everyone get perfect scores? Back home I was tied for first in the class because everyone got perfect scores," I say. My heart begins to pump harder when he looks at me and his mouth drops open.

"No. It's much harder here to get perfect scores. Honda-sensei makes the system as a whole nearly impossible for people to get perfect scores. I'm very surprised you got it," Kyoya tells me as I watch Tamaki leave and sit in a corner. The blond is almost accumulating his own personal shadow cloud.

"Did Tamaki not do well?" I ask Kyoya quietly. When I looked back to the raven haired boy, I found him watching me. I blushed insanely bright. If I get any hotter I could fry an egg on my face.

"He did mediocre," the boy replies to me. I nod and then turn to put my test away. While I'm looking at the binder in front of me, Kyoya sits on the chair in front of my desk. I can feel my heart pound and am already dreading trying to go home with these people following me.

"Are we through here?" I ask Kyoya in a harsh tone. I can't help it. People are getting on my nerves today. Besides, Kyoya is my least favorite person in the brothel and I would rather stay away from him and the evil glint in his glasses.

"Would you join us for lunch?" he asks me. I look and stare into his eyes. His eye lashes are long and you can't really see them from behind his glasses. But he looks really good in glasses. I wonder what he looks like with them off. Wait, what? I blush five times darker and I have achieved optimal egg frying temperature.

"Damn you," I mutter to him. I open my mouth to decline this invitation and calm myself when I can feel Tamaki behind me.

"Please Susan-chan! You said that you can't make friends, but we want to help you!" Tamaki says too loudly and the remaining people in the room turn and stare. My body tenses under the glares of the girls. Maybe I should stay away from these guys or else I'll have to kill some rabid fan girls.

"Tamaki please quiet down," I chide, but the boy then gracefully comes around and kneels at my side. He is so theatrical that it's no longer funny. I turn to Kyoya with a pleading look and he just adjusts his glasses and as usual they glint evilly.

"Please my hime-sama, I am begging you. Please accompany us for our lunch meal," he exclaims and suddenly offers me a rose.

I stare at the beautiful boy in both disgust and surprise. Disgust mainly because I can never believe he actually acts like this and especially with me. Surprise because, where the hell did he get that rose? For a moment I can feel my hand go towards Sally. No, I can't kill him I think sadly. I can feel the stares intense but not from the girls but from the boys. Now the whole male population of the class is checking me out. I start breathing hard and I motion for Tamaki to move. He tries to give me the rose but I don't take it from him. My palms are sweating badly and I know I need to get out of here. There was too much attention on me now.

"Hurry up and lead the way," I hiss quietly to Tamaki.

My chest starts painful compressions and I bite my lip piercing for a distraction. Tamaki nods and can see that I'm started to get bad. He quickly goes down the aisle of the room and I follow him quickly. Kyoya is right on my tail and I can feel him inspecting every part of me. It doesn't really help the situation. We leave the room and I start running towards the empty wing of the building. I can hear the two boys following me but I'm more concerned with my beating heart. My breathing is ragged and as I run up the stairs I can feel my throat nearly close. I turn down another hall and finally stop.

"Susan-chan, why were you running?" Tamaki asks me when he finally caught his breath. I go to the wall and slide down it to sit. When I'm situated, I look up at him and merely breathed in and out. He looked at me with concerned eyes.

"You can't make a scene. People stare and then I get panic attacks. If I have another one at school, Kou said he'll keep me home," I wheeze out. My face is red with his concerned stare. I look to Kyoya and to my surprise he is just leaning against the wall next to me. I feel tired, but nothing like my panic attacks.

"You can't go to the lunch room then," Tamaki says as he thinks. I look to him and am about to tell him to forget about me when he exclaims, "I'll go get us some lunches. You two stay here and we can have lunch here."

"Wait," I start and watch as the blond runs towards the lunch room. The arm I stretched out to stop him falls to my side and I sigh. Maybe Tamaki is really a stupid but courageous person. But he is stupid.

"Why weren't you at school yesterday?" Kyoya asks me. I stare forward and avoid eye contact with him. My heart is still pounding and I just want there to be silence. I close my eyes and breathe in deeply. When I feel myself almost come down completely, I feel a foot touch my leg and look up. Kyoya is looking down at me with an annoyed look. Looking back down, I frown into my legs.

"No talking," I tell Kyoya. I can feel the boy slide down the wall and sit next to me.

"Why not?" he asks and I can feel the smirk on his face. I can also feel him staring at me.

"I want to calm down. With you guys I swear I'm going to have a heart attack. I just want to calm down right now," I tell him truthfully. My heart is finally back to its normal pattern of beating and I realize that if I don't look at Kyoya I won't get nervous. Well, I'm still nervous, but not seeing his face really helps.

"Have you always had panic attacks?"

"They've grown since I was little. They got worse when I turned fifteen."

"What happened when you turned fifteen?" he asked in a suspicious tone.

I open my eyes and turn my head towards the Kyoya. Somehow not surprisingly, he's staring at me. His head is a short distance from mine but I still have to look up slightly. I purse my lips and he is smiling, but it feels wrong. His eyes are darker than normal. Even though I haven't known him a long time, I know when he's trying to get me to tell him something. He looks so mischievous, yet evil at the same time. Like we're playing a death match only he knows about.

"You don't need to know," I reply in a harsh tone. He quirks his eyebrow and looks forward. I turn forward and close my eyes again. Suddenly Kyoya starts chuckling. I choose to ignore whatever is going through his mind.

"Why won't you tell me anything about yourself?" he says, still chuckling.

"I don't like you. You're a suspicious person," I remark with a snort.

"I'm suspicious?" he asks in a surprised tone.

"I'm good at reading people. It's been ingrained into me since I was ten. You're different. You feel suspicious."

"Are you sure you aren't just scared of me?"

"No. You're suspicious."

Kyoya finally stops talking after that. Silence fills the space between us and I suddenly don't think he's so bad. I wonder why he was so surprised that I could read him. When I think about it now, anyone would probably think he's not bad. But I've had people trying to kill me since I was ten. I learned when strangers were lying to me. When I became boss of the Vario crew, I knew when a drug dealer would go against his word or when a newcomer was really an undercover cop. It was something that I was very cautious about. I was betrayed not by a stranger, but by a friend. It wouldn't be betrayal if it wasn't someone I trusted. The person who betrayed me turned into an informant after he became my friend. He was a coward.

"Susan-chan are you alright?" Tamaki asked. I was so into my mind that I didn't hear him coming. Rapidly opening my eyes, I can see him holding three sandwiches in his right hand and a bag in his left.

"Yes. Why do you ask?" I reply. Tamaki sits down across from me and Kyoya. He hands a sandwich to both of us and then pulls out milk from the bag. He hands one to each of us before opening his sandwich.

"You looked like you were going to cry. That or you were going to punch Kyoya," Tamaki replies with a shrug of his shoulders. I can feel the tips of my ears turn red and I look at my sandwich. Thinking about that betrayer always make me look like that.

"I'm fine," I try to reassure him. I take a bite of the sandwich and then open up the milk. The sandwich is actually pretty good and tastes like a mix of roast beef and turkey with Swiss. I take another bite when I feel Tamaki staring at me. I look up at him and see a puzzled look across his face.

"How do you eat?" he asks with a perfectly honest face.

"You really are stupid," I say with an exasperated groan. I take another bite of my sandwich. Tamaki frowns and then pouts with my insult, realizing that I thought he was stupid for a while.

"I meant with your piercings. Why do you have so many anyway?" he asks as he takes another bite of his sandwich.

"The first week or so is a real hassle to eat, but you get used to it. I've had them for almost two years now, so I don't have trouble. I have all my piercings because of," I stray off and try to think up a lie. The real reason why I have all the ear piercings is because it's my tally of the death matches I've won. Thirteen matches in total so far. I've never lost. The snake bites were because I wanted them.

"Because," Tamaki prompts. I look at him and frown. I look at my sandwich and try to think up a lie. My face turns slightly red with his staring and I figure they would take my lying tell as embarrassment. Maybe if the lie is embarrassing, they'll believe it.

"Because," I say and then find a good lie. I look up at Tamaki and my face reddens more. "My boyfriend used to do them. I wanted to have as many as him. I never caught up to the bastard."

"Why was he a bastard?" Kyoya asks. I turn and see that he is actually being honest. I look at him and smile a little, knowing they're going to buy my lie.

"It's a long story, but let's just say I hate cheaters," I say, placing an angry tone to my words. I look back to my sandwich and eat it. It's surprisingly quiet and I realize that the boys don't know what to say. I smile into my sandwich and we eat the rest of lunch in silence.

When we hear the bell, we all get up and walk back to the classroom. I'm surprised that I actually ate lunch with people. I haven't eaten lunch with people since I was thirteen. Four years of lonely lunches have passed by. I look to Tamaki and notice for the first time that I'm happy he's so overbearing. If it wasn't for him, I would still be alone. I'm far from being friends with them, but I'm making small steps. At least next time, I'll be prepared.

* * *

><p>Well, I wasn't quite prepared for what the brothel did after school. The bell had only rang a minute ago and already I'm running from the brothel. Running up stairs then jumping on my longboard, I can hear their steps dwindle. I turn the corner and feel deja vu. Suddenly they're blocking my path and as usual I'm sailing off my board, rolling a couple of feet from my dropped backpack. Sally digs into my thigh and I wince slightly in pain. Good think I gave the safety on. I close my eyes and will the brothel to go away. When I open them a minute later I notice I'm surrounded by them as they look down at me.<p>

It was an exact replay of Monday. I feel my panic attack start and I scoot away from them. My back hits the wall as usual and I close my eyes. I try to feel if Haruhi is going to come to me but after she doesn't I open my yes. I can see the brothel staring with wide eyes as they stand across the hall and remain quiet. I sit there and stare back at them. Didn't they have their club? Where do they get the energy to actually follow me? I stand up using the wall and close my eyes to just breathe. When my heart slows down, I open my eyes and can see the brothel looking at me with concerned eyes.

"Why didn't you come to school yesterday?" the twins ask me as they hand me my backpack and board. I take my things and then look at them. I brace myself on the wall some more and move along its cool surface.

"She was sick," Haruhi replies to their question. I give her a glare.

"_Traitor,"_ I mutter in English. Between her and Fu giving me up, I can't do anything.

"Sick?" the little blond boy says. I look to the little demon and scowl. Smoothing out my skirt I ignore him.

"Yes. Her panic attacks make her sick. She can't speak with us for too long. Actually she can't talk for very long at all," Haruhi says. Giving the girl another glare, I can see her shy away from me.

"Really? I didn't know that," Kyoya chimes in. Deciding to change the topic, I try to figure out what to say.

"Don't you guys have your brothel to run?" I ask harshly. Immediately I feel bad for being so harsh on them. I place a sorry look on my face and look to Haruhi. Her large brown eyes are understanding and she replies.

"We were actually wondering if you would like to come."

"I'm sorry, but I'm not into that stuff. Bad for my reputation and all that," I reply with a wave of my hand.

"We do not run a brothel!" Tamaki exclaims.

The boy is suddenly in my face with a pout. I stare at him for a few moments before realizing he's still arguing about his club activities. I give snort in his face and he goes to a corner. Immediately the darkness is back and I quirk an eyebrow at Haruhi.

"Does he do that often?" I ask her.

"All the time," is her reply.

"I'm sorry," I apologize to her. With my cheeky comment, I can feel my palms grow sweaty. Did I really say that out loud? Oh my god, that's terrible.

"It's okay," the twins reply. I look at them and feel my face turn into a confused look.

"What are your guy's name?" I ask with a red face. I can't believe I never learned any of their names.

"I'm Kaoru," says the twin on the left side. I study his face and notice his hair is parted to the right. His eyes are somewhat older looking than his brother. He also stands a little straighter than his brother.

"I'm Hikaru," says the twin on the right side. His hair is parted to the left and I notice his eyes are brighter. Not in a malicious way, but childlike and almost mischievous. In addition, his muscle mass is slight more than his brother.

"Ok," I reply when I'm sure that my assessment is done. The twins look at me with smirks.

"Do you like what you see?" they ask. I snort and can feel my ears burning.

"I'm making sure I know which is which," I reply then turn to the giant and the small blond demon.

"I'm Mitsukini Haninozuka but you can call me Honey," says the demonic blond pointing to himself. He points to the giant and continues, "This is Takashi Morinozuka but you can call him Mori."

"Okay." I wonder if they're from that legendary karate families. I think I remember Fu saying something about them. I don't really remember. I wasn't paying attention too well.

"So? Are you coming?" the twins ask in unison. I look at them and then shake my head and try to walk away. Honey, the little demon, stands in front of me and I look down at him and wonder how he is in high school.

"I don't want to come to your club. I've spent more than enough time with you weirdoes as it is. No offense Haruhi," I tell the girl. She puts her hand up.

"Don't worry about it Senpai."

"But you have to come," the twins say again.

"I don't have to do anything."

"But we want to be your friends," Tamaki exclaims, obviously over his depression.

"Yes, and I get that. But you guys have to give me time. I don't work well with people. I take time to adjust and you guys sneak up on me like I'm about to be jumped," I start out calm but it progressively gets more hysterical and my heart beats more rapidly. "I don't do friends. It's just who I am. You guys are overbearing and perky and all too weird for me to just hang out with you guys. We can try to be friends, but I make no guarantees! With the way you guys treat me like I'm some exotic animal that has to be cornered and surrounded, maybe I'll get used to you more if you just approach me nicely. And no I don't want to come to your brothel!"

I breathe heavily. That's the most I've ever said to them. My heart is beating like I'm going to die and I close my eyes. I gasp and try to take in air. But somehow, no air is coming into my lungs. I choke and can feel someone come up to me. I open my eyes and see a hand go out to help me. I slap it away and then walk back to my wall. I place my head against the cool marble and try to breathe.

"Susan-sama!" a voice shouts. There's my nice twin: Hideo.

"Get away from her!" screams an angry voice. And there's my angry twin: Aiko.

I can hear guns being pulled out of holsters and feel arms wrap around me and push me behind someone. Finally opening my eyes I take in the scene. My twins are dressed in red yukatas which are slightly open from drawing weapons. Hideo and Aiko are holding the brothel at gunpoint and Kou is shielding me from them. Kou turns around in his blue yukata and looks me over. His eyes are completely worried and I know what's running through his mind. If I'm hurt because of the people he wanted me to make friends with, he'll never forgive himself.

"Guys, disengage. I'm fine. They didn't lay a hand on me," I tell my twins. The immediately put their weapons away. Kou looks at the brothel, his inspection finished.

"Orders, Susan-sama?" the twins ask.

"Go wait in the car. I'll be right there," I tell them in a rough tone. They sometimes are a little too gun happy for my comfort.

"Hai," they reply and head towards the front. How they found me was a surprise in and of itself.

"Kou you can go back to the car too," I whisper to the young boy. He stands and pushes me behind him when I try to walk around him.

"You are the people who caused Susan-sama to be sick," Kou says angrily. I hope he doesn't take out a gun and start shooting them if they argue with him.

"We did not mean to make her sick," Kyoya replies. The brothel looks shaken up from having weapons pointed at them again, but they're recovering remarkably quickly.

"We just want to be her friends!" Tamaki says happily. Kou looks to the larger blond and scoffs.

"Friends don't circle friends like a pack of lions. You people aren't good for her if you're going to cause her panic attacks when you try to talk to her. She doesn't need friends like you then!" Kou exclaims back at them.

"We're sorry," Haruhi apologizes. "We're trying not to do this to her. In the future, we'll make accommodations for her panic attacks."

"Yes. I have an idea," Kou roars. "How about you stay away from her?!"

"Kou that's enough," I order when he opens his mouth to yell some more. His face is hurt that I chided him for protecting me. I look at the boy and give him a reassuring smile and ruffle his hair.

"I'll be fine. They're going to try to be my friends and they're not going to do this to me again. If they do, I won't ever talk to them again. Okay?" I ask him in a soothing voice.

"If that's what you want," Kou replies with a soft smile. I smile back at him and then turn to the brothel.

"Heed my words. If you do this to me again, I won't hesitate to take precautionary measures," I say darkly. My mind is transferring into gangster mode with Kou by my side. I leave after the brothel gives me nods of confirmation.

Kou and I walk to the car in silence. I can tell that he wants to ask if I'm alright, but he knows it'll make me angry. I already said I was fine, so there should be no reason to question my judgment. When we finally get outside and head to the gates, I can see my twins waiting by the car. We all get in, myself squished between the large twins and Kou getting shotgun.

"Susan-sama, there is a slight problem with Kasanoda-gumi," Fu announces as we drive off. I sigh and put a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

"What is it?" I ask, exasperated by the day's events.

"Two of their members want to switch yakuzas. They have come to us to see if they are allowed in. I have two members watching them right now," the man driving replies.

I can feel my eyes darken with suspicion. Why are two members transferring alliances right now? Do they want to spy on us? Or are they trouble makers? I won't know until I talk to them, but even at that they might try an assassination attempt. That's why my men are so on guard. They're expecting a set-up and are nervous. I sigh once again.

"_I'm not prepared for this shit,"_ I curse in English.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Hey there everybody. Hope you like this chapter. It's a little more dialogue than I normally have, but we're learning more and more about Morrigan's past. We are also seeing how she sees Kyoya: lol, suspicious person (aka stranger danger). Now I know I have a lot of OCs, but it's actually for a purpose. You see, I'm trying to make a mirror of the Host Club in Dojin-kai. We've already met the twins (Hikaru and Kaoru, Aiko and Hideo), the one who cares about HaruhiSusan the most (Tamaki, Kou), the one who runs things behind the loving person (Kyoya, Fu) and next chapter we're going to see the cousin's parallel. So in all of this, Susan is Haruhi's parallel. Although Susan is like Haruhi in some respects, she is also somewhat like a foil. Haruhi is a natural people person, Susan has panic attacks. Haruhi lost her mother/had very little family, Susan had a large family. Haruhi had friends, as seen when she works for the break, while Susan has been alone. Susan at times can be cut throat and doesn't expect the best out of people while Haruhi gives everyone a chance. So you see my lovely readers, all for a purpose. I only hope you guys will like it! Ciao. _**

**_Remember to follow, fave, review, obsess. (I do not own OHSHC)_**


	7. Is it a Dream or a Nightmare?

**Chapter Seven: Is it a Dream or a Nightmare?**

* * *

><p><strong>"He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it."<strong>

**― Douglas Adams, ****_The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy_**

**"Some people see things that are and ask, why?**

**Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not?**

**Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that."**

**― George Carlin**

* * *

><p>"Alright, this is what's going to happen. I'm going to go in with the twins. Fu and Kou you two are going to make a group and secure the syndicate. I don't want anyone coming in or going out. If you guys hear shots, do not come into the conference room. I'll take care of it myself and I'm not planning on getting a hole in my uniform. I trust that everyone is armed, so if you need to use them, use them."<p>

The car is silent with anxiety. I take Sally off of my thigh holster and take the safety off. Might as well be totally ready when we get out of this car. I close my eyes and take in a deep breath. My men need to be strong. But they need me to be stronger. I am not nervous. My purpose is to protect my men and be ready. I am prepared. Opening my green eyes, I can feel them change. I'm in gangster mode. My men will live another day.

"We're here Susan-sama," Fu says as the car comes to a stop. I can feel Hideo move to get out, but I grab his sleeve.

"I will protect you all. This might be a set-up, but this might not be. The truth is we're going in blind, but I'm going to do everything I can to make sure that we all are going to have dinner together. Maybe Fu will actually let us eat pizza for a change," I chuckle and then smile at my men. All the men turn to me and I say, "Trust me. I promise I won't let you down."

"We are aware Susan-sama and I speak for all of us when I say, we trust you. But you must remember that we will protect you also. You aren't the only one who stands on your side. We are here for you," Fu tells me. I look at the bald man and smile. Tears are threatening to break my mode of mind. This is the kind of trust I need. These men are more trusting than my previous crew. This is my true family.

"Yah and maybe Fu will give us pizza for once," Kou says, shaking his blue haired head in humor. I laugh and Hideo moves to get out. I can see a slight mischievous smile on his face. Leaving my board and bag in the car, I slide out. Getting out behind Hideo, I can feel Aiko getting out behind me. His face is also lined with the same mischievous smile.

My smile turns into a smirk and put Sally in the back of my skirt. Kou stays in the car with Fu so he can go park it. I begin to walk up the stairs with the twins flanking me. When we get to the top, my syndicate members line the path. They are all solemn and bow to me, staying silent. I can feel their fear in the air. They know that as much as I do, that this could be a set-up. They know that these visitors might kill me. My mind is calm, gangster mode filling me. I'm confident even if these visitors are ready for killing me.

"What no 'hello'?" I ask my members with a smirk. My men rise and look to me.

"Hello, Susan-sama," is their only reply.

Their faces are concerned and anxious. I begin to walk and reach the door. I allow the twins to go in and turn back to my men. My men are a rainbow of clothing. Looking at each of them closely, I can see their worry, their experience, and their fear. My men range in age, some as young as Kou others as old as my pa. They have come from all walks of life, but we all have something in common. We were alone before we came here. I was alone before my father found me and gave me a home. This is my home. They're part of my home.

"My men, I was sorry that I snuck out this morning. It was, childish," I smile and they smile back. "At the moment I am going to have a meeting with these visitors. Be on guard. I expect all of you to send me off when I go to school tomorrow. Because you can trust that I will be going to school tomorrow."

"Hai," they reply with less fear in their eyes. They're still worried about me, but I can tell that they trust my judgment.

I nod and then go inside the door. I take off my shoes and don't bother with my house slippers. I take Sally out of my skirt and make my way to the conference room. The twins already made their way to conference room. I walk faster, not liking my men to be alone with these Kasanoda people. When I come to the conference room door, I hold Sally and open the sliding door. In front of me are my twins sitting on this side of the table.

Across from them is a large man in a black yukata and a smaller woman in a black kimono. The large man is in his twenties and has an almost angular face with dirty blond hair but black eyes; he's a mix of Japanese and what I might suppose was German decent. The woman is also in her twenties but is more German than Japanese, her hair being a black but her eyes a light blue and a short muscular body. They're both good-looking and appear to not have their Kasanoda-gumi daimons anywhere, if at all.

"Well, what do we have here?" I ask them with a smirk, putting Sally to my face in a thinking expression. The two strangers tense and I stare at them with a raised eyebrow. If they are here to kill me, they would have done it to me already. I know that they would have had their weapons removed, but a good assassin always hides them well.

"Susan-sama, this is Hana and Haru Krupke," Hideo tells me, awkwardly pronouncing the German last name. I move to sit. These are the worst assassins. That is if what they wanted to do was kill me.

"Ah, I thought you were German. Are you siblings?" I ask them with a raised eyebrow.

"Cousins," the woman—Hana—says while her kin merely nods his head silently. I sit down and lay Sally on the table, towards them. Their eyes are wide and scared. I watch them as Hana looks to Haru for reassurance. Haru looks to me and I can see him tense under my examination.

"Well. What are you here for? My men told me, but I want to know what you're here for from your mouths," I tell them. Again, the large man tenses and the woman opens her mouth.

"We are here to see if you would take us in," Hana says. She moves her arm to her hand into her black kimono and I immediately have my gun pointed at her. The motion is like she's going to pull out a gun. I no longer think she isn't an assassin. I'm very suspicious.

"I don't like that movement," I hiss as her cousin puts his arm in front of her body. I look to him and my twins already have their guns pointed at him. "Hands are to be where I can see them if we continue this meeting. And by continue this meeting, I mean, you are still alive."

"I'm only reaching to get my money pouch," Hana squeals with wide blue eyes. I raise an eyebrow with my glare still on my face.

"I don't want your money. I want to know why you came to me. Why not Sendo-kai or another smaller yakuza? Why did you leave?" I ask bluntly with a glare. Hana and Haru lay their hands on the table and the twins relax slightly. I put my weapon back in front of me and the twins lay theirs next to Sally.

"Because you made a treaty with Kasanoda-gumi and you're going after Sendo-kai. We heard about the hostage situation turned massacre. Our old boss was going to try to eradicate you even after you made the treaty, but when we heard you took out Sendo-kai's largest regiment he reconsidered," Hana said and I scoffed in disgust. Hana's cousin glared at her through a side glance. I could only think it was because she let slip that Kasanoda was going to go against our treaty.

"So what you're saying is that you don't want to be on the losing team?" I ask Haru. The large man looks at me and then runs a hand through his blondish hair.

"Hai," is his only response.

I nod my head once in understanding and then put my hand to my chin. I rub it and observe these new applicants of sorts. I stare at them and contemplate. These two can very well be traitors. Hana has yet to answer why they left. But that is really meaningless. They could be spies. That would be worse than if they're just troublesome children. But how would I solve that if they were spies? What would father do? He would probably say, 'keep your friends close, but your enemies closer'. If they are going to spy on me for Kasanoda, have them so close to me that they wouldn't be able to go back. But I could always kill them if I grow tired of these spying games. I look to the cousins and watch as they shift uncomfortably. Might as well know what kind of people they are.

"Why did you leave?" I ask them, taking my hair out of its ponytail. The cousins cast nervous glances at one another but remain quiet. My anger boils up and I unleash it in a roar. "How dare you! You come to my syndicate, sit in front of me, take the time out of my day and you won't give me the courtesy of answering my questions. You fools! You hypocrites! You ask all this of me, and you won't even give me answers."

"I'm sorry Susan-sama," Hana cries out. Silence covers us once again and I look to the woman. She turns her head down in some kind of emotion. I stare at her and notice that her face grows red and I realize the emotion is shame. Whatever they left for, it was because of her and she's ashamed because of it. I don't care though. If she doesn't tell me, I can't help them. I pick Sally up and point it at Hana.

"You expect me to allow you in, without knowing if you're spies? You don't want to tell me why you left Kasanoda," I say in a calm voice. My voice drops in volume and grows sharp like a knife. "I am not a fool. I will not put my men in danger if you are here because you want to do harm. I don't care if why you left was shameful, or if you are running away because you disobeyed. I need to know why, for my men, for my family."

"It's my fault," the cousins say at the same time. Both of them put their heads down at the same time. I've had enough of this. I cock my gun and point it at Haru.

"Speak," I order.

"They were going to force her to marry. She couldn't. The man that they were forcing her to marry was a bastard. He would have treated her badly. In a drunken stupor he would have killed her. I told Kasanoda about it and he turned a blind eye. I couldn't let her do that, so I forced her to leave with me. We came here because I believe that you could protect her. If you only take her so be it. As long as she's safe," Haru says.

I look at the man. Throughout his monologue his eyes fill with tears. I watch as Hana looks to her cousin and starts crying herself. Their eyes and body language say that what was said is the truth. I didn't feel that they were spies, but merely scared humans. I watch as Hana throws herself into her cousin's arms and cries. I keep my gun on them, just in case. Should I take them in? They didn't seem like they were lying and if I keep them close to me, they won't be able to report to Kasanoda. They escaped and they are asking for help. I have to help them. If I don't, I would regret it.

"Back in your seats," I tell them. Hana lets go of her cousin and sits back down. I lay my gun down and stand up. "Do you have weapons?"

"No," they answer.

"Are you sure?" I ask one last time. They both shake their heads.

"Your men took them when we got here," Hana says.

"Then follow me. I'll have Fu get you guys set up. I expect you guys to stay with him at all times, if you aren't off with me. You're going to be my bodyguards. In addition, you listen to my twins and if they're gone you listen to Fu. You are to not leave the syndicate. If I catch you a foot off the property line without me, I'll kill you. I'm not going to have you go back to Kasanoda and reporting what I'm doing. Do you understand?" I ask them, turning my back and walking out the room. I hear their footsteps behind me.

"Hai," they reply.

"Very good," I say and walk towards the front door. Going through the halls, I stop at my room. "This is my room. I have school on the weekdays, so I expect you guys to escort me to school. Picking me up, you'll go with Fu and Kou in the car."

"Susan-sama, did you—" Kou starts as he rounds the corner. When he sees the cousins behind me, his mouth closes.

"Hana, Haru, this is Kou. He is my personal member. Kou this is the Krupke cousins. They are going to my body guards off the property. On property they're going to be Fu's personal helpers. Can you go get him and let the men go about their business?"

"Hai," Kou replies and looks to the cousins with a worried look. I turn around and wave the twins off. They get the message and leave me alone with the cousins.

"Heed my words. If you should betray me or lay a finger on any of my men, you will wish that you were never born. I take my syndicate and caring for my members very seriously. I will not hesitate to take your fingers if you go against me or doubt my abilities. If you don't think I can lead, you can leave now and when we meet again I can kill you. No one goes against us and lives. No one will ever betray me again," I say darkly, my eyes swirling with hate.

I hate when I take in people who are sketchy. I never want to be betrayed, but it's not like I can let them go. They came to me looking for help, and I will house them. They might turn into good members. Hana is shorter than me, but looks like she can take on Hideo and Aiko. Haru on the other hand looks almost as tall as that giant Mori. Their whole vibe says they're really scared but truthful. I'm going to trust my gut and just hope that it won't end up bursting in my face.

"Hai," they reply with strong voices. Fu comes up behind me and the large man places a hand on my shoulder.

"You called for me Susan-sama?" he asks and tightens his grip as he watches the new members.

"These are the Krupke cousins: Hana and Haru. They are going to be your personal men. Use them as you may, but when I'm off property they're my bodyguards. Make sure that they're capable bodyguards," I order.

"Very well Susan-sama. This will take some time, so dinner will have to be ordered in. You can have Kou order pizza," Fu says as he comes around. He stands over me and smiles. My eyes turn wide and my smile goes from ear to ear.

"Really!?" I ask a little disbelieving. Fu never allows American food. He says it doesn't sit the way food should in the stomach.

"Go, before I change my mind," he smiles. I nod and then run down the hall to the living room.

"Kou," I yell. He pops his head out from behind the doorway to the kitchen. "We get pizza!"

"Really!?" Kou asks astonished. He comes to me and I nod rapidly. Grinning like fools we begin to jump around the living room. I grab his hands and we spin until we're both dizzy.

"Ahem," a voice interrupts and we let go of each other's hands. Both of us fall into the wooden floor and laugh hysterically. Fu stands with our new inductees.

"Welcome to Dojin-kai," Kou says to Hana and Haru. The large cousin smiles and his eyes light up with happiness. His smaller cousin laughs and comes pick me and Kou up. She grabs our hands and we all begin to spin. Again Fu interrupts us and we let go and fall.

"Welcome to the family," I say breathlessly with a large smile on my face. I'm so happy, I feel like I'm in a dream come true.

* * *

><p>"Come on guys. With this pace we're going to be late for school," I yell behind me. I'm riding my board, on the way to school and the Krupke cousins are following. Fu said that they were extremely capable bodyguards, so he sent them with me. Of course Kou is trailing them to make sure they go back home.<p>

"We are hurrying Susan-sama," Hana replies. I can tell that they're short of breath but I don't slow down. I have to get to school on time.

"Only another block," I tell them as I see Ouran. How they got that school to be so pink is amazing. The cousins are suddenly running at my sides and I can see a person waiting by the gates. They're small and have brown hair.

"Susan-senpai," the voice yells when I get closer.

The feminine body waves and I purse my lips as I approach. I know that the cousins are with me right now, but when they leave, I'll be nervous. Though I suspect because Haruhi is the most mild of all the brothel, I'll get used to her the most. I don't think I'll ever get used to Tamaki though. I approach the gates and Haruhi stands before us with wide eyes. She hasn't met the cousins yet and Haru's height probably scares her a little bit. Not to mention the killer intent rushing off of Hana.

"Good morning Haruhi," I tell her with a slight smile. I'm really trying to be her friend here. The cousins push me behind them and are going to frisk Haruhi when I clear my throat. The cousins immediately halt a few steps away from Haruhi. "Guys, this is Haruhi Fujioka. Haruhi these are the Krupke cousins, who are just about to leave and go straight home to help Fu with the chores."

"Hai," the cousins reply to my lined command. They turn and begin to walk away. But before they pass me, I put a hand on Haru's arm.

"I let you in because I hope that you would become great members. Don't make me eat my words or Hana will surely live the hell you escaped from," I whisper, my voice like a darkness with the sharp edge of a knife.

Haru's eyes widen ever so slightly and he gives a nod. I nod and take my hand away from his arm. As much as I trust him and feel like he can turn into one of my men, I can't grow lax. I have to make sure that none of my men would get hurt. Besides, Fu will straighten them out and Kou will make sure they follow the rules. I want to help the cousins, but I can't get too soft. This is a tough life I live and one wrong mistake, one eased mind, one kind heart, might cost my men their lives.

"Are they your cousins?" Haruhi asks, breaking my concentration. I turn back to her and my heart begins to speed up.

"No, they're cousins. They have no relation to me," I reply vaguely, kicking my board up and holding it in my hands.

I begin walking and as usual Haruhi follows me. We walk halfway to the door and I notice that Haruhi is very quiet. They quiet is somehow not the same as it always is. I normally need the silence to calm myself, but right now I feel too calm. I've gotten used to my anxiety always gnawing at my mind. This is so weird. My nerves aren't killing me like they always are and my palms aren't sweaty with fear. I don't like this feeling I conclude. But why?

I stop in my place. Haruhi pauses with me and looks to me with a curious look. I don't have nerves because she isn't talking to me. My anxiety always kicks up when I'm talking to a person. Why isn't she talking to me? I thought she wanted to be my friend. Don't people who are friends talk? But didn't I not want them to talk to me. No, I want her to talk to me. Oh my god, I've gotten used to her talking to me. I want her to talk to me.

"Susan-senpai ar—" Haruhi starts.

"Please talk to me," I blurt out.

Blushing heavily, I look at my feet. How could I say that? That is so embarrassing! Escape is the optimal route. But I don't want to run away from her. She's too nice and I want to be her friend. She isn't like other people. She asks me if I'm alright and worries about me way too much. She calms the brothel down so I can stop my panic attack. I want her to be my friend.

"I'm sorry Senpai. I thought I would let you get used to me first," Haruhi's soft voice chimes in on my internal struggle.

"I'm sorry. That was rude of me," I say quietly while looking to Haruhi. Haruhi is looking at me with kind eyes and I can feel my face blush even harder. I start walking again. It's the only thing I could do to prevent me from running away from her.

"So, we made a plan on how we'll talk to you," Haruhi says bluntly while catching up to me. My nerves start bouncing around in my chest, but it isn't painful. Well, it isn't painful yet.

"You have?" I ask while staring straight forward. I may want her to talk to me, but I'm still nervous.

"Yep. Before and after school, it's only going to be one of us. I think today is Honey-senpai's turn. Just so you know, Mori-senpai might follow you to make sure you don't hurt his cousin," Haruhi says in a curious voice. I look towards her and feel surprised that they actually took my needs into consideration.

"That's fine. I won't hurt Honey if he doesn't hurt me," I reply with a soft voice. It's my motto of sorts when they tell me not to hurt people. It's always, 'I won't be the one to throw the first punch', or 'they'll have to hurt me first'.

"Well, I don't think you'll hurt us Susan-senpai," Haruhi says happily as I open the doors to the main building.

"Sometimes, I think you guys have a little too much faith in me," I reply with a nervous snort.

"You aren't bad, you look after others. Besides you saved me. I know you did," she says with a proud voice. I look at her and blush when I see she's staring at me with a closed eye smile.

"It was not big deal," I mutter, my accent heavy with my embarrassment. It's been getting better but comes out really heavy when I'm embarrassed.

"Just to let you know, Tamaki-senpai and Kyoya-senpai are going to eat lunch with you," Haruhi says quickly looking forward. I blanch and choke on air.

"What?" I semi-yell. Those two want to each lunch with me? Oh my god, Tamaki is going to make a scene like usual.

"Kyoya-senpai said that you weren't as nervous with them at lunch if they're not really annoying. Besides, you can talk to Kyoya-senpai easier than the rest of us," she says as we cross into our wing of the building. She turns down a hall to the first-year's rooms. The bell rings and Haruhi turns to me with wide eyes and then runs off down the hall. Hallway down, she yells, "I have to go Senpai. I'll see you later."

"Wait, what do you mean by I can talk to Kyoya?" I yell down the hall.

What did she mean I can talk to Kyoya? He's the worst of the whole brothel. Is it because he could eat lunch with me or that he helped me down the stairs? I couldn't really talk to him. Where did she get that ridiculous notion? Oh well, I have to go. I drop my board and run onto it. Going so fast my hair flies behind and my skirt ruffles itself. I put a hair behind my ear and turn down my hallway to the classroom. Pulling my lip piercing into my mouth, I make a half smile. They're really trying to be my friends. I'm going to actually have friends.

I continue on with my day and my periods pass quickly. I forget my anxiety and focus on my studies and realize that Japanese history isn't as hard as I originally thought. As fourth period comes, I start to grow nervous. Those two have been staring at me for some time now. I can feel their eyes on me, but they're not as bad as they always are. As the minutes tick down, my heart begins to pound and the buzzer rings. Shuffling kids are heard around me, and I can feel them approach.

"Susan-chan!" a voice says, very happy and sickeningly sweet. The voice is way too excited to be Kyoya, so that leaves only one person.

"Tamaki, please don't make a scene," I order while getting up from my seat and grabbing my lunch in my backpack. I walk away and exit the classroom. I can feel the two boys follow me and I turn to go up the stairs toward the abandoned wing.

"You're in a good mood," Kyoya mutters to me, coming to my side. I can feel my heart start to pound harder, but I look at the raven-haired boy.

"Why do you say that?" I ask him. He gives me a once over and I blush and look forward.

"Because you're allowing us to follow you," he replies with a chuckle. My face frowns with his teasing manner. I don't like it when he laughs like that. It sounds so fake; almost like when a boss tells a joke and it really isn't that funny, but their men still laugh because it's still their boss.

"Yah. If I tell you to leave me alone, Tamaki would just make a scene and I would just have a panic attack," I say, once again tucking a hair behind my ear. I left my hair down, only because I woke up late and didn't want to put in in a bun when it's wet.

"I would not!" Tamaki yells in my ear. It's more of a whine and I nearly forgot that he wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed.

"Don't yell in her ear," Kyoya reprimands.

I look to the suspicious boy and wonder why he defends me. Kyoya is looking at the floor, seemingly wondering the same thing. I blush slightly and look at him with a small smile. Whatever the reason, I still appreciate him sticking up for me. We walk up the large flight of stairs and I'm somehow blushing harder when I chance a glance at Kyoya and see him catching a glance back at me.

"You brought your own lunch?" Tamaki asks, his voice a little bit quieter.

I'm thankful for the distraction, my face turning tomato red from getting caught looking at Kyoya. Tamaki comes in front of me when we get to the top of the stairs. My heart begins to pound as he puts his face in front of mine. I close my eyes and take deep breaths in and out. I don't want to hit the boy, he's only stupid and doesn't deserve the black eye.

"Yes," I answer and open one eye and see that he's standing a couple of feet back.

My heart keeps up the heavy thumping, but I walk away before it gets worse. I turn down another hall and go to the wall with windows. I slide down the wall, light flooding in from the open window. The breeze rustles through my hair. It's weird to me how we start school in April. As it is, it's the third week in April and I can only feel I was a little jilted leaving in the middle of my junior year. Cherry blossoms enter the open window and I hold my hand out to catch one.

"They're beautiful aren't they?" Tamaki asks as he sits across from me.

I look at the blossom and suddenly feel the pang of homesickness. Even though I didn't talk to anyone didn't mean that I didn't miss my home. I missed the simple things like the sound of honking and the accents of New Yorkers. My bed and my room, all custom made by my father. Then I missed my school. The smell of sweat and gym socks missed with Dolce and Gabanna perfume and plaid skirts and peter pan collared white shirts.

I would have had my spring dance where it was mandatory for parents to attend. They would of course have a father-daughter dance, just like every party the gang had for birthdays and baptisms. Realization hit me: I will never get my father-daughter dance. My father won't hold me and laugh as I blush when people stare at the mob boss and his daughter. Will I ever see my father? I can't go back and he can't come to me. It's too risky, for both of us. I will never see him again. I will never hear his laugh. I will never feel his warm hugs.

"I won't get to dance with him ever again," I mutter, my eyes cloudy with tears. I don't think it really hit me until now.

"With who?" Tamaki asks, his voice concerned. I look up at him and see his blue eyes filled with confusion and helplessness. He wants to help me, but he doesn't know how. With my free hand, I push at my eyes and my tears back into my body. I smile a reassuring smile and try to comfort him. Tamaki isn't impressed.

"Never mind me. Do you have lunch?" I ask trying to change the subject. I crush the cherry blossom in my hand and try to forget the sadness in my heart. The rest of the day passes in a blur, to the point I don't even remember Honey walking with me to the gates. Everything feels like a dream I'm caught in and can't even escape. Somehow, in this day, my life doesn't feel it's real. But I can't tell if it's a dream or if it's a nightmare I'm living.

* * *

><p>While Susan Crea was at school, her newest inductees walked home. The Krupke cousins knew that Kou was following them to see if they were going to actually go against the boss's word. Haru wouldn't go against Susan because he knew she was cutthroat with traitors. Hana wanted to truly impress her new boss. Both inductees knew Susan would protect them from any Kasanoda-gumi members, but if they went against her, she would kill them.<p>

Rumors were circulating through the Kanto region since she moved her syndicate here. Her fame of the Dark Princess had spread to other countries, not just America. It was often said that she was temperamental and cruel. It was also said that she wouldn't hesitate to kill you if she didn't like something about you. The cousins knew that their boss wasn't really like the rumors. Instead, she cared for her men and regarded them as family.

Haru was surprised that she even mentioned the safety of her men in their first meeting. Hana was over-joyed to hear that this syndicate was different from Kasanoda-gumi. Where the Kasanoda boss ran the syndicate like a proper business, Susan ran hers like they were family. In Kasanoda, everything was for the benefit of the yakuza as a whole. For Susan, it was for the well-being of each and every member, no matter if it was for the yakuza.

"Guys, I have to go to the market. I can't leave you guys alone, so you have to come with me really quickly. Fu said he had to get more rice and since he had to prepare whatever it was he had to prepare, he just called me to get it. So off to the market we go," Kou tells the cousins with a firm voice.

"Hai," they reply.

The cousins had been around the block more than once, so they know they should be more humble than outgoing. They also know that they had to listen to Kou. Even though the blue-haired boy was young and he was a little flighty, he was the closest of them all to Susan. One bad word about them to Susan is all it took for them to have a bullet in the back of their heads.

Kou led the way to a supermarket, with the cousins following in suit. It didn't take them long to get there, but they were dangerously close to Kasanoda-gumi territory. Kou wasn't scared, he knew that they wouldn't go against the treaty. The cousins, on the other hand, were very tense. They knew that if the treaty wasn't what was best for Kasanoda, it would be broken immediately. As the three of them entered the large supermarket, a large crowd of people blocked their path.

"Damnit. Today's the sale on fancy tuna," Kou curses. He looks at the thrall of people and then turns back to the cousins. "I'm going to go get some. You stay here and if I come back to anything suspicious, I'll shoot you on site."

"Hai," they reply. They knew Kou would shoot them if he wanted. They watched the small blue-haired boy disappear into the crowd of people. Haru kept a hand on Hana's sleeve to not lose her. She was so small that in a second she would disappear into the crowd and be lost for seemingly forever.

"Well what do we have here?" a voice says to Hana's left. She goes cold with fear. She knows whose voice that is, and she isn't at all prepared to face them.

The girl turns to the side, but is quickly pushed behind her larger cousin. It's Erai, a vile man who stands at almost six feet and always reeks of alcohol. He has a crude smile and shaved head with dark evil eyes. The fear Hana feels is only intensified when his eyes stare at her and snake up and down her small body. This is the man, Hana was to marry. The man who scares her to death. The man who can never touch her, if she wanted to live.

"Erai, go away," Haru orders in a dark voice. The older cousin's voice is so dark that it has competition with that of a demon's.

"Why did you take my wife away from me?" the evil man hisses. If this goes on, Hana knows that shots will be fired and Susan would be very disappointed in them.

"She is not your wife. She will never be your wife!" Haru yells at Erai in rage.

"Tsk. She will be mine when we take over your new syndicate, unless you would like to help us?" Erai asks, his voice filled with dark mischief.

"What do you mean take over our syndicate?" Hana hisses this time. No one is going to touch her new family.

"I mean that we're going to get rid of that damn American whore and you'll be mine. Kasanoda-sama is willing to offer you a deal. If you help us take down Dojin-kai, he won't let me marry you and will protect you," Erai says grudgingly.

Haru looks at him with a suspicious look. If Kasanoda protects Hana, it might be worth taking the deal. For Hana's safety, Haru would walk through hell and back. Hana on the other hand was sure that they would never protect her fully. If she wouldn't get married to Erai, she would marry someone just as bad. Or worse yet, they'll hurt Haru. Kasanoda said that they'll protect her and not Haru. But even at that, she couldn't turn her back on Susan. Kasanoda couldn't protect her from Susan, and if they betrayed their current boss, they would surely meet their death.

"We decline," Hana replies. Erai's eyes brighten with lust and the chance of tainting Hana's body. Hana shivered in disgust.

"You'll go down with the American whore, you can be sure of that," Erai says with a wide smile.

"Don't call her that," Haru says darkly.

"Why? Don't tell me you actually trust that girl?! She doesn't care about you! She'll chew you up and spit you out," Erai laughs.

"No she won't. We're family!" Hana yells at Erai. The cousins lift their sleeves of their left arms and underneath, show their newly imprinted daimon. The cousins had refused to get the Kasanoda-gumi emblems and therefore were unprinted before Susan.

"How dare you imprint yourself with the whore's symbol when you were with us for years! You bastards! You damn ass fu-"

"Say another word," a cool voice interrupts. Kou is standing behind Erai, a gun into the man's back. Erai turned white with fear, knowing it was the blue-haired boy. It was known that Kou would do anything to protect the members and even Erai knew that he would kill him if he stepped on his nerves.

"I was just leaving," Erai mutters and walks away. Kou let him go; only because he knew Susan would be angry that he broke the truce. Kou would tell Susan what happened, but he turns to the cousins and deals with them.

"What did he want?" the young boy asks.

"He wanted us to spy for them," Hana replies, fixing her sleeve.

"What did you say?" Kou asks, getting very suspicious.

"We told him we wouldn't go against our new family," Haru replies with a nod. Kou smiles at them both and puts his gun away. People in the store were unaware of what almost happened.

"Good," Kou replies and turns to leave the store with his groceries in a paper bag.

On the way home, Kou wondered who the man really was, but didn't dwell on it too long. For Kou, since the cousins came, everything felt like a dream you couldn't tell was a nightmare or a fairytale. But the dream ended and it was now clear that the cousins wouldn't be any trouble. Everyone was back to reality and the dreams have ended. That is, for now.

* * *

><p><strong>Hey everybody! I'm sorry that this chapter took so long to get up, but I made it a little longer than normal to ease your internal distress. To the anon review: thank you for the feedback. Looking back on the last chapter I do realize it was a little slow; I do need the critique for those kinds of things, so if anyone has any problems or even questions, comment and let me know. I started classes again and I'm so arrogantly tested into a fourth year latin class when I should have probably have been in a second year class. Oh, well, what is done is done, but that being said I'm not going to have as much free time. But don't worry, I won't put it on hiatus. I have to update my Naruto story, but that normally takes a lot of time (more time than this one). I am also very happy today, so I'm feeling outgoing. So I figured I might add a little bit of fun facts that parallel my life with Susan's. <strong>

**1. I do ride a skateboard and I do fall as often as Susan. **

**2. I do not actually have piercings or tattoos (deadly afraid of needles, but if it wasn't for that I might look like Susan)**

**3. I wasn't a loner in high school, but I do have anxiety and panic attacks. **

**4. If I had to, I probably would be a very good gang lord, but I have never been in any gangs. Fights, yes. Gangs, no. I have family for that. **

**5. Kyoya was actually my least favorite in the Host club and I had wanted him to burn and rot in the fiery depths of tarturus. (But for Susan, I will have to stomach him)**

**So remember everybody: follow, fave, review, obsess. Love you guys and keep the reviews coming. They make me happy!**


	8. Homesickness and Thigh High Tights

**Chapter Eight: Homesickness and Thigh High Tights**

* * *

><p>"<strong>Maybe you had to leave in order to really miss a place; maybe you had to travel to figure out how beloved your starting point was."<strong>

― **Jodi Picoult, **_**Handle with Care**_

**I love the whole lingerie outfit - you know, thigh-high tights and garters.**

**Jodi Lyn O'Keefe**

* * *

><p>The only sounds were the clanking of silverware against bowls and the rough breathing of my closest advisors. I sat there, shuffling rice back and forth in the bowl not really eating. Since yesterday I was in a state of homesickness which refused to yield. I was to the point that I couldn't look at anything without sporadic memories bombarding my mind. Kou was getting very concerned but I tried to go on with my day.<p>

I had barely eaten anything last night and today, I didn't even take any care with my uniform. My tights weren't pulled up at the knees and my skirt was on backwards. My shirt was sloppy and tie was not straight and my cardigan was pulled on haphazardly. The twins and Fu sat across from me in dark blue yukatas while the cousins sat to my right in red formal clothing and Kou to my left in white t-shirt and jeans. I looked at my men and they all met my gaze with worried and slightly scared looks.

"We should have a meeting since we're all here," I mutter and immediately think of the weekly meetings with my Pa. I could almost hear his too deep voice, clouded with tobacco use. Then his corny dad jokes flooded into my head and I cracked a smile despite the melancholy of my mind.

"Susan-sama," Kou starts as he reaches out and touches my sleeve, "are you sure you're alright? You haven't been yourself for quite some time. Yesterday you didn't even eat anything and now you're smiling at nothing."

"I'll be fine. You shouldn't worry too much about me. You're going to start to get an ulcer or something," I tell Kou with not much effort. I look into his dark eyes and know he wasn't going to let me out of the house.

"I don't think it is wise you go to school," Aiko says boldly.

"You seem like you are half asleep and dreaming," Hideo continues with his brother. I turn an icy gaze upon them both from across the table. The large men shift uneasily and I glare harder before resuming my saddened frown.

"You all worry way too much," I mutter and give a crooked half-hearted smile.

"You don't worry enough," Hana huffs loudly and crosses her arms.

"What she means is, you won't be able to defend yourself when you're at school today. WE merely don't want to go without a boss while we're at war," Haru tries to cover for his cousin. His eyes were wide with fear and I merely sigh at both of them.

"Alright, but if we stay home, then we aren't going to lounge around. If you guys aren't going to let me go learn at school, I'm going to learn who I can put in the games. Gather everyone. We're going to spar and I will be everyone's opponents."

This might actually take my mind off of home. If I spar hard enough then I won't have time to let my mind wonder to other things than the fight. Besides, I had to learn my men's skills before I send them out to the game. If I just sent them out, I might as well tell them to jump off of a cliff and fall to jagged rocks below. This is how I'm going to get over my homesickness. I'll fight until my knuckles are black and blue, until my forearms are nearly broken and my lip cracked open and bleeding. It will feel like I'm with my family. It'll feel more like home than anything I've done here so far.

"You're going to spar everyone?" Kou yelps with his voice seemingly in pain. I smirk at him and then push my rice to the center of the table.

"Mostly everyone. The people I don't spar today, will have to wait until tomorrow. On Sunday, we might actually be able to rest. Or we can a nice dinner with everyone in attendance. It'll feel like home!" I shout, way too excited for my own good.

Kou looks at me with raised eyebrows and I know he caught onto my secret. I was really, really homesick. There is a cloud of awkwardness that floats above us and a blanket of silence falls. I pray that no one actually asks me anymore questions. My prayer obviously was not heard.

"Home? You miss America don't you?" Fu asks, voicing the elephant in the room. I look away, slightly embarrassed and rise from my seat.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I mutter to them, slightly angry that they found me out.

"You're a dirty liar!" Kou shouts and I see the twins cringe.

I turn my face to the young boy and glare. Kou tries his best not to shrink into himself but it doesn't work. He bows his head to me a moment later and I turn away from the table. I know that Kou is really just scared that I'm going to go back and leave them. As much as it pains them that I'm a woman and a foreigner at that, I am the best boss they have ever known. I'm gutsy and I don't care if I have to take out people myself. Actually I prefer kicking their asses myself. But for them, I'm their everything. For me, they're my new everything; the possibility of going back is always looming over their heads because they weren't and won't ever be my first gang. But that doesn't mean that I'll leave them.

"I will always miss where I was born, but that doesn't mean that I will not be proud of you guys or consider this my new home. It merely means that I have to get over whatever my heart had wanted," I tell them with apparent sadness in my voice.

"We know and it's okay to mourn for what you have lost," Hideo says.

"But that doesn't mean that you should never look at yourself and remember home," Aiko replies after his twin.

"I remember home," I reply and turn to my men. "It's just that I want to fall apart and I know that I can't. I want to break down and mourn and feel bad for myself. But the truth is I don't have the time. We are going to start a war and I have to go to school. Besides, I don't want you guys to do this."

"Do what?" Hana says quizzically.

"I don't want you to feel bad for me! I don't want your sympathy. I'm your boss and you guys shouldn't have to put up with a crying, sniveling little girl," I say with a hysterical chuckle. I feel like I'm going to start to cry. I haven't really cried and mourned for my leaving home. I promised myself that I wouldn't.

"But we want to help you," Kou replies and stands up.

My men all stand up and they surround me. Normally this situation would make me go into an anxiety attack, but rather I feel sheltered. This is proof that they are my gang, that they are my family. Tenderly and with so much more soft touches than I could ever imagine the twins hold me. Haru, the largest of all of us, clutches my head and Hana takes my hands in hers. Fu and Kou look at me and I can feel their hands soothe me while rubbing up and down on my back.

"Guys, you're going to make me cry," I blubber and begin to feel tears running down my cheeks.

"Shhh," Kou says as the rubbing makes me calmer. "You're going to be alright. Susan-sama, you aren't alone anymore. You won't ever be alone and you won't ever leave us. I promise, you won't ever leave your new family ever again."

"God. Oh my god. Why do you say that? Why do you make me want to cry? I'm going to cry and I'm not going to able to stop. Oh my god," I moan with his kind words. My cheeks begin to grow a river. No, it was more like its own ocean.

The ocean was making me get a river in my nose. I suck in my nose and immediately feel dirty and pathetic. It didn't help that Hana was intertwining her fingers into my hands or that her cousin was stroking my hair so calmly. I start that obnoxious half crying a moment later. The ugly sound makes my chest begin to shake and I cry harder and harder. My legs almost buckle and I feel so pathetic for crying. I feel even more pathetic because I'm being held by my men and they are seeing me this way.

But I take the time to actually check how I'm really feeling. Ever since I was little, my safety for not getting hurt was never realizing it bothered me in the first place. This was how I felt about being abandoned at birth; this was how I felt when I couldn't take my abusive foster parents; and now this is how I feel about leaving the only family I've ever had. Empty. This is how I got to go on. If I don't feel anything, then nothing bothers me and I can go one. But now that my men are making me face it, I feel. I feel empty and alone.

"I feel so alone," I cry out and finally voice all my negative emotions. "I feel like I used to before I met Pa. Back when I was by myself and I had no one. Even though I have you guys I don't know why I feel so alone. Why do I have to feel so alone? Why am I so pathetic? I don't have a reason to be so unhappy. I shouldn't feel this, this, this empty."

My legs finally buckled and the twins lowered me to the ground. My back was shaking and it looked like I was having a spasm of some sort. The moaning and wheezing didn't stop. My men held me for a little while longer and I could feel myself so dehydrated and tired I could pass out. When I finally finish my pathetic episode, I open my closed eyes. In front of me was Kou and he grabs my face in his hands.

"You have to tell us when you feel like this. We have to help you. None of us can stand seeing you like this. And you are by far not pathetic. You are the strongest girl I have ever known. You aren't alone either, no matter if you feel alone or sad or pathetic, know you are never alone," he tells me as he wipes the tears from my face.

I sit and start to chuckle slightly with his cheesy speech. It makes me feel so much better though. I know he's telling me the truth and I know that I'll never be alone. Somehow, my pain ridden heart begins to heal, even though I never knew it was broken to begin with. I had been carrying on with my life for so long, that I couldn't tell how badly I had been hurt or how sad I had been. But now that I finally acknowledge how I feel, maybe I can move on. Maybe I can be happy.

"You know you're really mushy, don't you?" I ask with a smirk. My men, knowing that I have finally stopped my pity party, rise and look at me expectantly.

"So what," Aiko says with a smirk of his own.

"If we are?" Hideo finishes with his shy smirk.

"We can't let you go all crying on us without us doing something," Hana says then bonks me on my head. I smile and rub my head. I look to Haru and he nods with her.

"We will be your strength, even when you feel weak. Know that you are always strong, because you have us," Fu tells me with his fatherly smile.

I realize that they are my family and so much more; they are my strength; they are my love; they are me, when I can't even be me. I stand up and dust off my uniform. My face feels wet and I feel so tired. Suddenly, my huger attacks me like I have never eaten ever before. Wiping my face of the ocean, I wonder how I could have cried this much. I sniffle one more time and sigh, letting all my emotions out once and for all.

"Alright. I'm going to go finish my breakfast, then change into some battle clothes. I want all the men who have any chance for being in a death match. I'll be screening each and every person possible. Understand?" I ask my men in a strong voice, extremely different from a moment ago.

"Hai," they reply in cheery voices. I look back at them and smile widely.

I take my seat and begin to eat my rice. I check my emotions once again when my men disappear. I feel empty still. Frowning, I know it's going to take time to heal. Every wound needs some time to become what it used to be. I reach for a toast and then sit there munching quietly. When all is still, I can feel it. It is faint and the aching of my heart is really overpowering it, but it's there. Happiness. I feel happy that I get to be with my men and that I have a family. Happiness that I'm not alone. I smile even wider when all my men come back to the room and sit back down. They each pour a cup of tea for themselves while I finish. I observe their faces and notice their worried looks. I look at them and smile from ear to ear.

"And guys, no one tells a soul that I cried or else I'll make you cry for the rest of your life," I threaten sweetly.

"Hai," they say with slight fear in their voices. But somehow when they look back at me, there is relief. When relief and slight fear fades, they are left with realization. They probably are wondering if they just created a monster.

* * *

><p>A fist flies to my left and I barely dodge in time. My attacker tries to turn quickly and chops from the other side. I duck and try to side-swipe his legs. My attacker jumps back and I stand across from the boy. Kou is huffing and puffing, a wild look in his eyes. He refused to fight me, but I got him angry enough to lose it. I have to see what he is capable of. I watch as the boy circles me like a lion. Smooth jazz is playing in the background.<p>

"Are you ever going to actually land a punch on me?" I tease.

Kou looks at me and his face contorts into pure anger. I laugh as he gives a battle cry and rushes at me. Right before his right fist will make contact with me, I spin and grab his head in a chokehold. The boy flails and I chuckle at his attempt to flip me. I'm not going to go down that easy. I hold him a little longer before Kou relaxes and I know he's passed out.

"Do you really have to knock everyone out?" Hana asks while taking Kou. I nod and then put my hand out. Haru immediately has a glass of water in it.

"I need to know if you guys can handle passing out. I also need to see how you wake up," I tell her.

I take a sip of water and watch her place Kou next to Fu who is laid back against the house. Today is Saturday and I have fought all of the men. Of course, it was tiring as all hell and I barely finished after 36 hours of straight fighting. But it was worth it. I look at my arms and can see that my prediction about getting hurt badly was pretty accurate. My arms are tinged with an ugly shade of yellow and patches of green. The left side of my face is bruised also, taking a hit from Hana and then another from Haru. My lip is swollen on the right side and my legs have multiple purple patches.

All in all, I look pretty messed up. I really didn't feel too bad, but my men are worried as usual. The only bad part of fighting with four hours of sleep is that I feel like I want to pass out. But I isn't at that point yet. I hand the glass back to Haru and watch as Fu starts to wake up. I observe him, seeing his eyes go wide while he tries to remember where his is. He's quiet and when the realization finally hits him, he gets up calmly.

"Why do you need to watch how they wake up?" Hana asks me, watching me observe Fu.

"I want to know if they freak out and panic. Fu is a prime candidate because he observes, then tries to get up," I reply. Kou's eyelids start fluttering open. I watch as he opens his eyes and jumps to his feet, frightened and ready for something. When realization hits, he falls back to the ground.

"I guess Kou failed?" Haru asks me from behind.

"Yep. He can't compete. He doesn't have the patience or the skills necessary just yet. The twins can't because they are my seconds. You guys are ready and have no real problems except I need you for bodyguards. Fu would be great also, but he has to watch you two." I sigh and then look at my gang. The jazz music intensifies and I say aloud, "I'm picking the men next week after I observe them train with each other."

"I will have them ready," Fu replies and comes to me. I look at him and wipe sweat from my brow. The song ends and another long winded jazz piece comes on. I look at Fu and frown.

"Can we listen to something else? You've heard this stuff from the past two hours!" I whine. Fu looks at me like I just said the most offensive thing in the world.

"No. We listened to Kou's anime openings for two hours, so my jazz shouldn't be so bad," he replies with a huff, crossing his arms in denial.

"Those were anime openings?" I ask and look the young boy. He shrugs sheepishly and I laugh at him.

Since we were fighting, I allowed everyone to pick their music and play it for a little while. Everyone's music taste differed as greatly as them. Hana and Haru both like rock, Hana leaning more towards screamo and what I would assume was death metal while Haru stuck with classic and soft rock. The twins both didn't like the spoken word stuff, but Hideo was a classical music fan while Aiko listened to raging electronica. Fu was stuck on jazz and Kou—little did I know—was an anime opening fanatic.

Walking to the boom box, I stop the CD. Fu didn't have an IPod and all his music was still on discs. Kou comes over and gives me my IPod. I bend down in my training gear and plug it in. I squat in front of it for a couple of minutes thinking about what playlist I should play. Moving my face back and forth, I wonder at the same time if I should change. I'm wearing some short spandex shorts and a muscle band tee. The t-shirt was one of my newer ones and not from a concert, being the white skull of the Misfits on black cotton. Better keep it on, it's more comfortable anyways. I smile when I decide on my playlist labeled, "Shut Up and Just Dance Already".

"Are you guys ready to dance?" I yell at my gang. They all stand and look at me like I'm crazy. The familiar tune starts and the lyrics flow out.

_Oh don't you dare look back. _

_Just keep your eyes on me. _

_I said, "You're holding back."_

_She said, "Shut up and dance with me." _

_This woman is my destiny. _

_She said, "Ooooooh, shut up and dance with me." _

I grab Kou's hands and then we start jumping around the place. I laugh uncontrollably as the familiar tune comes to my memory. Hana joins in and we're dancing a circles as the song goes on. Aiko soon can't resist and he comes with us and Hana grabs his hands and starts twirling. I'm still jumping with Kou when I see that Fu, Haru and Hideo snickering in the corner. I glare at them and motion to come dance.

They shake their heads and I sing: _"I said, 'You're holding back'. She said, 'Shut up and dance with me'. This woman is my destiny! She said, 'Oooooh, shut up and dance with me'"_

I grab Fu's hands while Kou grabs the other two. The large men shake their heads and soon Hana and Aiko surround them and we start jumping around them. Their faces were of overt fear. They didn't know how to dance and I just start shaking my head. I grab their hands and start swaying from side to side, my hips start to have a mind of their own. The men finally get the hang of it as the song begins to end.

"You guys are doing pretty well," I praise them. Hideo and Haru blush brightly and I laugh as another song comes on. Its 99 Red Balloons, but the German version.

"Oh my gosh! I love this song!" Hana cries and starts singing in German to the song.

I laugh at her and start twirling with Kou once again. It seems that Haru loosened up and was singing at the top of his lungs with his cousin. Hideo and Fu try to escape again, but Kou and I grab them. I begin to twirl around with Hideo and the man blushes brightly. Laughing, I twirl faster until his eyes start turning in his head. Hideo then starts to laugh himself and I'm happy that he feels more comfortable. I look to the side and see Hana being spun by Aiko and suddenly wonder if something else is going on there. I look back at Hideo and he catches my glances. Staying quiet, I begin to make us twirl faster. The song changes and I squeal with the opening notes.

"_ABBA!"_ I scream.

Some lyrics pass by as I grab Haru by the hand and start to let my hips go at it. Kou grabs Hana and she starts dancing with him. I laugh as they form a circle by joining hands with the others. They circle Haru and me, but Haru lets go of my hand and joins the others. I laugh as they surround me and start to sway and sing. I'm surprised they know the English lyrics and I sing with them. I'm twirling and jumping in the middle of them before stopping and letting my hips sway.

"_You are the dancing queen. Young and sweet, only seventeen. Dancing queen, feel the beat from the tambourine. You can dance. You can jive. Having the time of your life! OOOOHHH. See that girl, watch that scene, diggin' the dancing queen"_ I sing with my heavy New York, now mixed with Japanese accent.

Through the cracks in my circle posse, I can see some spectators. I don't pay them any mind and continue to dance, letting my hands snake up to my hair and pull out my messy ponytail. Shaking my hair out, I finish the song with laughter and the others break away. I wait for the next song to start, but the first notes enter then air and then are abruptly stopped. I whine and look for the culprit to find one of the gate's men. My eyes go wide and I look to his left to see a sight which could almost make me faint.

"The brothel?" I ask breathlessly, not even because I just danced through three songs after fighting for hours, but because I'm just so surprised.

"Susan-chan, can we dance with you?" Honey asks in his childish voice.

I stare at him like he'll go away any second. When he doesn't, I look to the rest. They are dressed in designer jeans and polos and vests. Haruhi is the only one different and wears a yellow sundress that goes to her knee. I look at them once again and my men are starting to feel worried. I haven't addressed the brothel and they don't know if they should throw them out or not. Rubbing my eyes, I notice my left eye is really tender and I realize I should ice it. Staring one more second, I walk past the brothel without saying a word and go into the house. Arriving in the kitchen, I can hear footsteps following me. I grab a pack of ice from the freezer and put it on the left side of my face.

"I'm in shock," I whisper to myself as the brothel comes into the kitchen. My men are right behind them and are eyeing me closely.

What are they doing here? Why can't they leave me alone? I was very happy until they showed up. Now I have to pretend that I'm not sad or that I don't want to deal with them. I can just have them thrown out of the syndicate. How did they find it anyway? Why did the gate man let them in? I have too many questions circling my brain. My anxiety is going to kick up at any moment. I know it.

"Susan-senpai, are you okay?" Haruhi asks, breaking the silence. I feel, well, I don't really know how to feel and therefore are not 'okay'.

"I don't know," I tell her truthfully. I sigh and look at Tamaki who has been surprisingly quiet.

"Well, I guess you want to know why we're here!" Tamaki's extremely excited voice shouts. I spoke too soon.

"Why?" is my only reply. Kyoya is inspecting me carefully and I glare and sneer at him. I don't like him seeing me with such little clothes on. As it is, these shorts are like booty shorts.

"Because we wanted to go shopping with you. We expected you to be asleep or doing homework, not dancing in the middle of the courtyard with American music blaring from the speakers. But that's okay. So, where would you like to go first? The mall? Or would you like to go down to the art district? Maybe we can go to a karaoke bar!" Tamaki says this way too fast and the brothel twins are suddenly at my sides.

"But boss," the one that is Kaoru says.

"She stinks," the one that is Hikaru finishes.

"Of course I do! I was training, something you guys wouldn't know about. You barely have any muscle mass except for Mori and Honey," I say, offended with the evil twins' comments. Mori and Honey both look at me surprised with my comment.

"Why are you training?" Kyoya asks, trying to be innocent but his eyes say differently.

"None of your business," I say in return before taking my ice pack and going to the living room. I might as well show them to the door. My men look at the brothel with varying degrees of anger. Fu comes next to me as I walk through the halls.

"Would you like me to escort them to the gate?" he asks.

"I'll do it," I say as I shake my head and then make my way past the dining room table.

"We can wait here for you, Susan-chan. You can go take your shower and then come with us," Honey says behind my back. Before I know it, the brothel is sitting their butts in my dining room.

"I never agreed to come," I reply, my anxiety finally showing itself. Just the thought of going out with them makes my stomach do suicide dives.

"But you have to!" Tamaki whines. "Who else is going to be the bestest friend for my daughter!"

"Daughter?" I mutter to myself and then look immediately at the only female in their group. Haruhi sighs and I suddenly feel bad for her. They must drag her into a lot of unnecessary stuff.

"You don't have to come because of me Senpai," she tells me when she catches me looking at her.

I blush slightly and take the ice pack away from my face. I weigh my options. I feel bad if I leave Haruhi to deal with the brothel by herself. On the other hand, I really don't want to spend time with them. They'll cause me another panic attack. But I have to get used to them if I want to be their friends. I guess I could go and if it gets too stressful, I'll leave. Damnit.

"Let me go take a shower," I tell them and walk out of the room. My gang follows behind me. I hand the icepack to Fu.

"Hideo and Aiko, you two go run the men through some training exercises with blades. Cousins, you two get the extreme pleasure of watching me as we shop. Fu, make sure our guests don't touch anything. Kou, I need clothes."

"Hai." Each man leaves on to prepare or carry out their job. I sigh and head to the bathroom.

"Do you want to wear a dress?" Kou asks me as we approach the bathroom.

"No," I reply.

"You sure. That one with glasses is pretty cute and he seems to be worried that you do training," Kou says as he wags his eyebrows suggestively. I roll my eyes.

"He's suspicious."

"Suspicious is good."

"In what universe?"

"In this one?" Kou questions himself. I chuckle slightly and then arrive at the bathroom.

"Leave the clothes out here and I'll be there in fifteen minutes. Keep an eye out. I don't want them messing in my stuff," I tell Kou.

He gives me a ridiculous salute and then leaves me alone. I go in and start my routine looking at my injuries in the mirror. I was wrong when I said I didn't think my left side was that bad. My left eye and down my cheek, is swollen and an ugly blue color. The bruise spreads out and disappears into my hair line, but I know it continues to almost my ear. My right snake bite is swollen on the lip, but isn't so bad that I have to take it out. My arms and legs have their multiple bruises, but Kou will probably get me tights and a long sleeve shirt to go out with.

I sigh heavily before getting in the shower and turning it to a burning level. I wash my hair and when I run the soap over my bruises, they feel tender to the touch. A knock on the door is heard and the door opens. I freeze on the other side of the shower curtain. The door closes and I know that Kou just left the clothes on the sink. Getting out quickly, I find my outfit. A pair of black thigh high tights with purple polka dots, a gray A-line skirt that'll go a little below mid-thigh, a black long sleeve shirt with lace for the sleeves, and black combat boots. I smile at Kou's choices, knowing that I couldn't have chosen any better.

I put the towel on my head and dress quickly. When I'm done dressing, I take the towel off my head and put my hair it a bun. My bangs are already drying and I brush them down. I fix my piercings really quick before heading to my bedroom. In my bedroom, I get Harry and put him in a thigh holster, my skirt being slightly bulged. Getting two switch blades, lay them on them on the bed and put my boot up onto the bed so I can hide the knife in it.

"Are you ready yet?" a voice asks at the door. The voice is cold and I'm suddenly highly aware of how short my skirt is and that my thigh highs aren't just cute but really provocative.

"I thought you would wait a little longer," I reply blandly, shoving the blade into the outer lip of my boot. I put my other foot up and shove the blade in that one.

"Are you always armed?" Kyoya asks me as I turn back around. His voice is intrigued and curious. I can read his face and it says he's thinking about something. I don't know what that is, but I have the feeling I wouldn't want to know. He stands at the frame of my door and I frown.

"Let's go," I say. Brushing past him, I push back a loose strand of hair behind my ear. Kyoya follows me and I can feel his gaze on me. Rather, I think he's trying to see if I really do have a gun under my skirt. I stop before we reach the dining room and whisper with a smile, "I never leave home without something."

"Oh," is his only reply. I quirk my mouth to the side, knowing he's trying to discern if I'm armed at school or not. We enter into the dining room and I hear Tamaki gasp.

"Oh my goodness! What are you wearing?" he asks and comes up to me. He is immediately in my face and staring at my outfit, going from combat boots to messy bun.

"I'm wearing a very cute outfit," I say and push him away. A slight blush comes to my face and it's probably only noticeable on my non-bruised side.

"Are those thigh highs?" Honey asks, coming to me with a hand stretched out to touch my tights. I swat his hand away and Mori places himself protectively in between me and his cousin. I hiss slightly, baring teeth. Then I blush even brighter and turn to Haruhi.

"Do we have to go?" I whisper to her as I hide behind her small body.

"No, but I don't think we can decide. I really like your outfit by the way," she whispers to me. The orange-haired twins come to both of our sides.

"What are you,"

"Guys talking about?"

"Can we go already?" I whine and find my heart is starting to beat harder than before. I'm starting to get nervous.

"Okay!" Tamaki yells and exits the room.

I sigh and look to Haruhi. We're both wearing the same, 'it's going to be a long day' expression. I turn to Fu, the cousins and Kou. They all look like they're sending me off to kindergarten. They're faces are both worried and happy at the same time. Trying to smile reassuringly, I nod to them and the follow the brothel out. The cousins had changed into their red kimono and yukata set and follow behind us. Kyoya turns around to look at me.

"Why are they following us?" he asks, curiosity pouring from his voice.

"They're my backup," I reply and lag a little closer to my bodyguards. Kyoya walks beside me as we get out the door of the house. As usual my men line the path and the brothel looks at them with uncertainty.

"Have a nice day, Susan-sama. May you return safely to us," they all chant and I can't help but laugh when Tamaki jumps and yells. He clings to Haruhi for safety and she looks completely done with the situation.

"As usual, listen to the twins. I expect you all to be here when I come back," I tell my men. Kyoya watches me out of the corner of his eye and I find a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. Blushing brightly for some unknown reason, I smile as my men bow to me. With my farewell over, I begin to walk down the path. The brothel seems to be in shock but follows after me. Walking down the stairs the evil twins come up to me, and I can see the gears turning in their evil little heads.

"Are you,"

"Their boss?" they ask one after the other.

I sigh and shake my head. The brothel still hasn't figured out that I'm a yakuza boss yet? They really are a bunch of idiots. Finally getting at the bottom of the stairs, I see a limo waiting at the curb. I quirk my eyebrows and wonder if they always travel like this. The twins go to the limo and a chauffeur opens the door. The climb in and I wait for the cousins, letting everyone get in before me.

"You guys want to follow in the car?" I ask them quietly, but Kyoya hears. Kyoya having waited for me.

"They can ride with my bodyguards," he offers and I turn to see another car across the street. Three men are next to the black sedan and watch me carefully. I look at them and glare them down. If I'm going to send the cousins with them, they better know that I won't let them bully them around.

"Thank you," I tell Kyoya and nod to the cousins. Hana smiles widely while Haru looks a little nervous. As he is about to walk away, I pat his arm reassuringly. Kyoya is watching me and quirks an eyebrow. I blush and look away from him. Why is he watching me today?

"After you," he says and I get into the limo.

It's cool and the rest of the brothel is sitting on the sides, chatting about whatever rich people chat about. I sit on the seat which is by the door and Kyoya places himself next to me. He's like a piece of gum under your shoe. Annoying and sticky and no matter how much you try to get away, it somehow always gets stuck. My heart starts pounding as the limo drives away from the curb and I immediately know that today is going to be a very stressful day.

* * *

><p><strong>Hey everybody! I am sooooo sorry that this chapter is really really late. Like I said before, I foolishly signed up for a class that I shouldn't have and now am paying the price. But I don't want to withdraw from the course and I want to get a good grade. I also realized that if I do really well in this class, I am halfway through a classical studies certificate. The next chapter is going to be really fun. It's going to surround their entire day spent together, with cute moments with Kyoya. As we are going to learn Kou is a total KyoyaxSusan shipper. Also, for the music, the first song is "Shut up and Dance" by WALK THE MOON, the second is "99 red balloons" by Nena (german version) and the last song is ABBA's "Dancing Queen". Please review, so I know I haven't been deserted and that you enjoy the story. As I always say, criticism helps me. In addition, the inspiration for the thigh highs was my order above the knee socks. <strong>

**So as always, love you guys. Review, Fave, Follow, Obsess. And I will try to get back to you guys quicker next time. See You later!**


	9. Bruises and Dresses

**Chapter Nine: Bruises and Dresses**

**"Dress shabbily and they remember the dress; dress impeccably and they remember the woman." **

**― Coco Chanel**

**"Over the years I have learned that what is important in a dress is the woman who is wearing it." **

**― Yves Saint-Laurent**

**"Scars have the strange power to remind us that our past is real." **

**― Cormac McCarthy, _All the Pretty Horses_**

**"Children show scars like medals. Lovers use them as a secrets to reveal. A scar is what happens when the word is made flesh." **

**― Leonard Cohen, _The Favorite Game_**

* * *

><p>I knew I shouldn't have come. I was only sitting in a confined space with a bunch of weirdoes and already my palms were sweaty as all hell and my heart was beating faster than a cat meeting a Rottweiler. Taking deep breaths in and out, I surveyed everyone in an attempt to calm myself. It appeared that the Hitachiins were teasing Tamaki about something and he was just screaming at poor Haruhi. Mori was looking on quite undisturbed as if this happened all the time, while his cousin was just laughing and pointing at the scenario.<p>

"Are they always like this?" I breathe out, not really believing that in between breaths the words slipped out.

"Almost always," Kyoya replies in a voice that flows so easily.

I tense at his words and realize I totally forgot he was even there. It was really surprising that I got used to him as a shadow. But I can't let my guard down so much. He is a suspicious person after all. I watch them more and saw the progression turn into Tamaki going into some lethargic state and being totally dead. Haruhi turns to me and gives me a sympathetic smile. I know she feels bad that she dragged me here, but I don't want to let her down. My palms are still totally sweaty but it's coming down since I'm not straining myself.

"Will you tell me why you were training?" Kyoya asks. I turn to him and give him a scowl. Turning back, the boy continues with a chuckle, "I'll take that as a no. Why do you insist on getting hurt? I'm sure that your bruises hurt. You shouldn't strain yourself too much."

"My bruises don't hurt. And if they do, the pain is nothing. Besides, you don't know me well enough to care what I do," I reply in a harsh tone. This boy is pissing me off. No one tells me that I shouldn't strain myself unless they're in my gang; but even then, they get punished.

"It's bad for our reputation," Kyoya replies in a voice void of emotion.

He wanted me to get hurt with that sentence. He wanted me to feel it. I immediately have this burning hatred for the boy sitting mere inches away from me. My nervousness is replaced with white hot burning rage. How dare he! If I'm bad for publicity then don't keep me around. Don't tell me I'm bad for your reputation when I wasn't even the one who sought you out. I am no one's charity case. I had enough charity when my father took me in. There is no reason that he should ever let words like that come out of his mouth.

"Well maybe you should convince Tamaki to leave me alone," I hiss. I am beyond pissed and don't even try to mask my anger. Haruhi catches my attention and I can see her wondering why my mood suddenly changed. I roll my eyes and point my thumb at Kyoya, not even trying to be subtle.

"You know I can't do that, Crea-chan," Kyoya using my last name.

I freeze in place with the malice in his voice. He is really trying to push my buttons and I don't know why. I can't tell if Kyoya was always like this or if he's really pissed that I look like I've been beating up people in the bar. I turn to him and let killing-intent roll off of me in waves. The people in the car stop talking. The car turns silent for a little bit while I stare Kyoya down. He tries to be tough by making eye contact with me, but with my pure anger it all fades away and he turns.

"If you are embarrassed by me, then stay away from me. I don't need people who are going to judge me on the way I look, speak, or act. It's my road or the high road. And don't you ever address me by my last name. I am Susan and only Susan. Do we understand one another?" I ask Kyoya murderously.

"I understand," he replies, not even looking me in the face.

"Great," I grind out between clenched teeth. I have to keep my anger in. Bringing my right foot up to the seat, Kyoya tenses. Wondering what his problem is, I bring in my right leg closer to my body and hold it in place. When the realization hits me, I laugh out, "If I wanted to kill you, I would have already. Don't be such a scardy-cat."

"That isn't funny Senpai," Haruhi chides from the other corner. I look her in the eyes and she doesn't flinch when I glare at her. My heart is beating in my chest, but not in the familiar anxiety. Instead it's beating in anger.

"Whatever," I say and give Haruhi a wide and maniac smile. She flinches then and I look to my left and out the window.

The ride is silent after that, Kyoya and I not even moving a muscle. He doesn't move for fear that I'll take my knife out and skin him. I don't move so I don't take it out and fulfill what he's so scared about. My anxiety comes back and my palms start to sweat. The anger goes down and I slip out of Gangster mode even though I never actually wanted to go into it in the first place. When we finally get to whatever godforsaken place these weirdoes dragged me to, I feel like a nervous wreck. My body is cold and sweaty and the heart that was so steady is jolted into skittishness.

The car stops and we pile out. I stand away from Kyoya, still very angry with him. When the others come out, they are looking at me warily. I blush and turn away from them to look at our destination. It seems they brought us to the Omotesando Hills mall. I only know what it is because we're in the back of the building. Kou tried to drag me into this super mall a little while ago. I had refused to go in. Looking back at the brothel, I find Haruhi looking at the large glass building with a bored look. I chuckle silently and move my way towards her.

"Have you ever been here before Senpai?" she whispers to me. I shake my head, my anxiety somehow shutting my mouth with super glue. Haruhi looks at me and sighs.

I blush when she looks at me but she turns back to the building a moment later. We enter from the back and once inside I'm bombarded with the smell of sweet perfume. It seems like they pump it through the vents. My eyes water, but I stride forward with everyone else. Tamaki appears to be leading the way, but the twins look like they don't approve of the direction I'm going.

"Boss, you're going to wrong way," one says and I recognize the stance as Hikaru.

"No, we're going to start on the West side and work our way back," Tamaki says with a twirl of his hand.

"No, we should start on the East," says Kaoru. I smile as they start to bicker and try to locate my bodyguards. The cousins are a few feet behind us, watching the scene with annoyance. I smile at them and they frown back at me.

"Come," Hana motions. I stray from the group and go to my bodyguards.

"What?" I ask, relief washing over me.

"Why are they such idiots?" Haru mutters beneath his breath.

"You should watch out for the kid with the glasses. His bodyguards were trying to get some information out of us. He seems like a suspicious kid with even more suspicious bodyguards," Hana tells me into my ear. My eyes widen slightly with her warning. I knew now that I wasn't the only who thought Kyoya was suspicious.

"Understood. You can get Kou and Fu to come pick us up, I don't want to stay with these people longer than necessary," I reply. She catches the sharp edge to my tone and immediately nods her head. She knows that something went on and she knows that I don't feel comfortable with them anymore.

"Hurry up Susan-chan," Honey's voice calls. I look back to the group and my anxiety hits me like a brick. Maybe I should just go home. Then I see Haruhi barraged by the twins and Tamaki and I know I can't leave her. Her face is much too sad.

"I'm coming," I groan and drag my feet to the brothel. "Which way are we going?"

"Have you ever been here before?" Tamaki asks coming into my face. My heart pounds and I raise my hand to hit him, but as usual Mori pulled him back. I sigh and shake my head.

"We're starting on the East side," the twins say with huff.

"Don't lie! We're starting on the West side," Tamaki exclaims at the top of his lungs.

The few people who were in the mall stopped and stared at us. Their eyes were on me especially and I couldn't take it. I grab Haruhi's arm softly and begin to walk away from the group. She follow, not even shrugging me away. We begin to walk faster and I remember why Kou had wanted me to enter this place. He wanted me to me our new tenants. Somehow, when we moved we had extra money, so we bought a space here. We've been renting it out since the beginning of the month and they're under our protection.

"Where are you going?" a familiar voice asks. I glare at Kyoya as he began to match steps with us.

"I don't want to just stand in the doorway and have people stare at us," I hiss at him. Haruhi gave me a disapproving look but I turn and focus on where we were walking, my rage and anxiety mixing together.

"Guys hurry up," Honey yells at the others. I looks back for a second and saw that the twins and Tamaki were still arguing. When they noticed they were alone, they follow and catch up to us.

"What store are we going to go into first?" Tamaki asks.

The question sparked a new argument and I shake my head. Why can't they just agree on something? As they followed us and argued, people were staring. I started breathing harder and not from me picking up the pace. If they kept drawing attention to us like this, I am going to get a panic attack. The eyes were on us the whole time. I turn to the right and ended up walking into a store. When we were in the entry way, I take a good look at the store. It was Dolce and Gabanna, and it was beautiful.

The store itself was painted a black color, but was adorned with crystals and mirrors. There were mirrors lining the ceiling and when I look up at our reflection, I chuckle. We looked like a bunch of preps who had every type of rich kid possible. Haruhi and I were a little out of place, but we actually look like we led the pack. My gaze shifted to the crystal chandelier that engulfed the white marble floors in their shining beauty. I could tell that Haruhi's and my eyes were as wide as saucers. Light classical music flowed in the background.

"Well are you going to walk in?" Kyoya asks, his tone lined with humor at my amazement. I glare at him and wonder how I could ever think he was nice.

"You don't enjoy anything?" I retort with faux-amusement in my voice. The boy's eyes narrowed ever so slightly behind his glasses. I turn my chin up and away. A girl then approaches us and I realize that I was still attached to Haruhi's side.

"Are any of you looking for something specific?" she asks. I tense at her gaze when she looked at me and her lip turned upwards into a sneer. My face was bruised and my self-esteem was beaten with one look from the girl dressed in a fancy black mini-dress.

"No," Tamaki saves, the girl turning her eyes to the princely boy.

She giggles some unknown joke and I roll my eyes. The twins were suddenly in front of us and they pulled into the store. I lost grip of Haruhi and Kaoru took my hand, leading me away. Soon we were surrounded by clothes that I knew had more than three digits. Kaoru held me a little away from himself and inspected me like I was a new toy. His eyes were sparkling with curiosity and excitement. I merely blush heavily under his scrutiny.

"Kaoru? What are you doing?" I ask after he started circling me like a vulture.

"How do you know I'm Kaoru? I could be Hikaru," he says mischievously. I look at him blank-faced.

"But you are Kaoru," I reply.

"That's funny. How do you know? By my hair?" he asks suddenly suspicious. I roll my eyes and blush.

"I know because I have twins of my own and I get to know their quirks: the way they walk, the way they enunciate words, the way their eyes look at things. I just know you're Kaoru," I reply and he froze in place. I roll my eyes again and went to look at the rack. Haruhi came back a moment later.

"They're going to want to dress us up like dolls," she sighs as Hikaru came prancing back to us with multiple dresses in his hands.

"Of course. Why else would we go shopping?" Hikaru replies, his twin recovering from his shock and coming to his side with dresses in his hands.

"For yourselves?" I ask hopefully.

"Don't make me laugh! We have personal stylists for ourselves. You guys, obviously do not," Kaoru replies with a large smile on his face. I frown and remember when I wondered if they had personal hairstylists. Guess my hunch was right.

"Please don't make me wear that pink thing," I moan as Kaoru once again strips me from Haruhi. She looks back at me with a pleading look as Hikaru takes her away.

"You will try on whatever we want," Tamaki exclaims, picking up pink dresses along his way to us. I moan and blush at the sound. How I could ever kill a person with my bare hands and then blush when I make a weird noise astounds me.

"Senpai, you have to go easy on her. She can't deal with us too much. I'm surprised she has lasted this long," Haruhi whispers to him when he goes to her. I turn my head and feel the source of my calm behind me. Hana and Haru are glaring at the girl who gave me a dirty look. I snicker when she squeals and runs away to the back of the store. They turn to me and give me big goofy grins.

"It's because she has her two friends," Honey says, looking between me and the cousins. I am surprised he caught on so quickly. Looking at the small boy, I wonder just how child-like he really is. His eyes scream evil mastermind as he gazes back at me.

"Well, anyway. We should get them into the changing rooms. We still have to go to a few stores," Kyoya says as he takes out a black book. I watch as the evil man writes evil plans in his evil book. He's just evil.

"Come on girls!" Tamaki says as he grabs both Haruhi and I. I put my feet into the ground and he stops pulling. My heart is pounding with their enthusiasm and I feel exhausted by their presence already.

"But I don't want to spend all that money on nothing. I don't need any dresses. If I have to be formal, Kou has an arsenal of choices," I tell him. I rub my wrist when he lets go. My wrist is somehow twisted and I wonder which one of my men caused the wound.

"Yes, but we don't like your clothes," Hikaru says, coming to my right side. I blush at his answer.

"Besides, you can't come to the dance like this," Kaoru replies, coming to my left side. I blush even harder.

"What dance?" I ask. Tamaki is suddenly hiding behind Mori and I'm ready to leave all these fools and go home.

"We want you to come to our Spring Dance next week," Kyoya says, his pen stopping for only one second.

"No," I reply with harsh tone.

"Why not?" says Honey, who is suddenly clutching his stuffed bunny and giving me puppy dog eyes.

"Because I don't want to go to your guy's dance. It's a dance only for your weird fangirls. I don't need them to come after me. Besides, I don't like crowds or dances," I reply and cross my arms over my beating chest.

I have to admit that I'm getting more used to them when we're alone. My panic attacks aren't as soon as they were with them before. My anxiety is not gnawing at the surface like it normally does. It might be because I can feel the cousin's presence and they are calming me down further, or maybe it's because I'm getting used to their weirdness. There is an odd silence when no one knows the right thing to say. I nod my head like this was the obvious answer to everything all along.

"You do like dancing," Kyoya breaks the silence. My head turns to him and my eyes try to pierce his flesh.

"Shut up," I threaten. It doesn't work because the evil boy merely gives me a smile and continues on with his statement.

"When you were at school on Thursday, you were sad because you would never dance with 'him'" he says in a teasing tone that somehow appeared more malicious than carefree.

"I heard that too," Tamaki chimes in from his place behind Mori. I glare at the blond and he makes a scared noise and hides once again.

"Who is he, Susan-chan?" Honey says in a childish tone filled with curiosity.

"A boyfriend?" Hikaru asks.

My palms are sweaty.

"Perhaps," Kaoru muses.

My heart starts pounding.

"I think it might be her ex," Kyoya adds fire to the already roaring flames.

My breath hitches in my throat.

"Yah, the boyfriend who did all her piercings," Tamaki's voice exclaims.

I search the room for my bodyguards, but I feel faint.

"Maybe," Mori adds with a nod of his head.

Black circles begin to cloud my vision.

"But why would she hold onto him?" Honey says in shock.

I'm starting to wheeze.

"Maybe because he was the best boyfriend she ever had," Hikaru says devilishly.

I can't breathe anymore.

"Ah, first love," Kaoru adds.

I feel trapped. I can't do this anymore.

"Guys," I yell. "I'm right here. Stop talking about me!"

I close my eyes as the panic attack threatens to take me over. They've done it. They've taken my hope that I could actually have them as friends and stepped all over it with football cleats. I don't know if they actually care about me enough to calm me down. Someone comes to me and I feel arms stretch out to engulf me. The body is small and for a moment I think its Hana. But when I close my arms around the petite frame, the cloth isn't that of a kimono. It feels like a cotton dress. It's Haruhi.

"Shhhhh," she says. "You're going to be alright. Here, let's just count to ten and breathe."

"I can't," I say between gasps.

"Just try," she returns. I keep my eyes closed and she pulls my body closer to her. "One."

"One," I say.

My breathing tries to steady itself.

"Two," Haruhi returns.

I tremble slightly and curl my hands in the fabric of her dress.

"Three," I reply.

Taking deep breaths, I wonder if anyone could die from too much oxygen. I don't think so.

"Four."

My palms are still sweaty but my heart doesn't feel like I'm having a heart-attack anymore.

"Five."

Maybe I can open my eyes? I don't think so. I don't feel like the room is spinning, but I don't trust my vison just yet.

"Six. You're going great Senpai."

My hands begin to slip away from the material of her dress.

"Seven."

I take my arms back and place them on my hips, breathing in and out.

"Eight."

Haruhi takes her hands away from me.

"Nine."

I open my eyes and find Haruhi smiling at me. She seems relieved. I'm relieved that I didn't actually have an attack, only the precursor to one.

"Ten," she says.

My gaze travels to the brothel who look at me with scared faces. They never know what to do to stop the attacks. They wouldn't last a day in the real world. My eyes travel to Kyoya and he seems surprisingly sorry. His eyes which are normally haughty and all knowing, look scared and unsure. I don't like that in his eyes, but also don't like the haughty tone to his beautiful orbs. What? When did I think his eyes were beautiful? Oh god. I blush even harder and turn back to Haruhi.

"Thank you," I whisper. She just nods. I turn back to the brothel, my anxiety lessened. "I don't want to go to your dance if you're going to do this to me."

"We won't allow her to go to the dance if you treat her this way," Hana says, appearing when the whole trial is over. I glare at her slightly, but she doesn't even look at me.

"We're sorry," Hikaru apologizes.

"We got a little carried away," Kaoru acknowledges.

"It won't happen again," Tamaki vows, somehow being brave enough to stand up to the small woman. Where the hell does he get that courage?

"It won't," booms the silent voice of Haru. The brothel flinches with the normally quiet cousin's angry tone.

"Besides, she should go to the dance," Hana says.

"I don't thin—" I start.

"No. You can't be cooped up with us all the time. You have to go out there and have fun. Make friends, no matter how stupid they may be. Besides, they just have to learn that they can't be so hard on you. They'll learn, or else they won't see the sun rise the next day," Hana says, her cheerful voice turning to a dark demon's with the threat. The brothel looks shocked she would threaten them so openly. The small woman smiles at them and then goes back to her hidden place.

"Well," Haruhi starts and ends with an open mouth. I look at her and smile thankfully. I like Haruhi. She seems like she's going to be a very good friend to me.

"Let's go try on clothes," I tell her and then lead her to the dressing rooms. The brothel recovers in another second and follows, arguing about clothes. I open one of the rooms and find its large enough for us both. I motion for Haruhi to come in and she follows.

"Okay, you guys start with these ones," Tamaki says, trying to hand us his pile. The twins beat him to it and give us their piles. I snort at Tamaki's sad face, my anxiety somehow being lessened with them saying they won't stress me out.

"Guys this is too much," Haruhi mutters as she tries to hang them on the hook. I snort at the twin's faces that she didn't like their choices.

Turning I look at them all. They might be weird or might bring me to the edge of a panic attack, but they aren't bad people. My gaze looks at each one. They try to be good people and good friends. My eyes land on Kyoya's who is surprisingly watching me. I look him in the eyes and suddenly it's like we're the only people on the planet. A burning curiosity flames both of our eyes and I watch as a smile begins to form on his face. But this smile is somehow different. It feels more alive, more real. I smile myself and somehow wonder who this Kyoya is.

* * *

><p>We went through just about the whole mall. I had not found a dress yet. Whether it be because the brothel rejected it or I found it too ugly to actually be in existence, I had no articles in hand. Haruhi though, had several. All of which were paid for by those who chose them. I don't even want to talk about the prices. They were sinful. Clothing shouldn't cost that much when people are starving in the world.<p>

The brothel was better with my anxiety. They didn't allow people to stare at me for too long. They also didn't hold conversations about me in front of me either. My anxiety was lowered to a point that it was like a throbbing appendage. You knew it hurt, but if you didn't think about if for some time, it felt like it actually might be okay. Of course, it did help that the cousins stuck closer to me than before. They were worried that I had an attack and they weren't the ones who comforted me.

"Come on Susan-chan," Honey calls. I was stuck standing looking at one of the store's windows. I looked at the mannequins and felt the strange feeling that I had seen this set up before.

"Can we go in here?" I ask, a little louder than normal because the brothel had started to walk away. The group came back and they looked at the mannequins with disgust.

"Here?" Kaoru asks, blatant disgust on his face. I snort and nod.

"It's almost closing time though," Hikaru whines.

"Are you sure?" Kyoya asks me. I was surprised with the question, but blushed and nodded. He sighed and says, "Come one. We have to let her have her way for at least one time."

"I like this store, Senpai," Haruhi consoled me as we enter.

The store was white and didn't look as expensive as every other place we were in. It was more minimalist, but the clothes were the real things. The store's name was 'Unique' and I understood why it was named that. Every article of clothing was handmade. There were dresses with simple patterns but the fabric was so symmetrical, it was beautiful.

"Hello. What can I do for you?" a young girl asks as she came out of the back room.

"We're just browsing," I answer before the brothel asks fancy questions. The girl when her eyes lay upon me, widen and her mouth drops open. She bows lowly and I'm startled.

"Susan-hime! I didn't know you were dropping by today," she exclaimed as she bowed. It hits me like a ton of bricks. This is the store that is renting our space! That's why the set-up was familiar. Kou must have shown me pictures.

"It's okay. I just wanted to shop," I reply quickly. The girl pops up from her bow and looks at me surprised. She is wearing a red A-line dress that appears to be satin. It goes to her knees, but unlike everyone we've seen, her hair is in a simple bun and she lacks the elegant jewelry.

"I can find you some things. Or we can make something that will suit you. Of course it is free of charge for you Susan-hime," she replies and then another girl who is dressed extremely similar to the first comes out. That girl bows lowly and I move to them.

"You don't have to bow or do this. You guys already pay rent." I feel bad if I take their money from them and then take free clothes too.

"But you gave us a home!" the new girl exclaims. I shake my head but she continues, "We were being harassed by Sendo-kai before. You gave us a home and saved us. They would have killed us!"

"Yes, but that isn't a reason you should give me free stuff," I reply. They shake their heads in protest.

"No. We will give them to you for free even if you don't want them!"

"Okay, okay. I get it. I won't pay," I say with a huff.

"Great. Now, what's your favorite color?" the first girl asks.

"Purple," I answer truthfully.

"Okay. We'll be ready in a few minutes. You wait here," they tell me. They leave a moment later and I'm left with the surprised silence of the brothel.

"How do you know them?" Tamaki asks, a little confused.

"I rent this space to them. I thought that the front seemed familiar, but I haven't actually be here before. I'm sorry," I tell him.

"How can you rent the space?" Hikaru asks. I look at him and wish they would just drop the subject.

"I own this space. They lease it from me. They don't actually pay too much, which I wanted to make sure. They were just getting started when they moved here."

"Where were they before?" Haruhi asks, curious herself.

"Some dumpy mall. Like you heard, they were getting harassed and had to move out. I had Kou and the twins move them in here. But like I said, never actually came here before," I tell them. The cousins began to look around the shop, curious with the dresses and products in the store.

"How did you actually get the money for this place?" Kyoya asks, his eyes darkened ten shades. He's being suspicious.

"I have my ways," I reply with a cheeky grin. I won't tell him anything. He can't know too much.

"Susan-hime," the girls came back with multiple dresses in their hands.

They usher me into a dressing room and I am suddenly in a room with Haruhi and different dresses. They're all beautiful shades of purples but some on Haruhi's side are green and blue. Mine are light pastel purple colors and others are black plum shades. I love the darker ones, but to my sadness I'm instructed to put on the light ones first. I look to Haruhi and she just shrugs and turns to put on a pastel green one.

"I don't like the light ones," I argue.

"You'll wear light colors for once in your life!" Tamaki exclaims.

"You look like a Goth," Honey adds.

"I don't wear any makeup. Therefore I can't be Goth," I say in astonishment. I don't think I could ever trust these guy's fashion choices.

"Let her try on the dark ones if she wants," Mori interrupts to my surprise. I smile behind the door.

"Listen to Mori!" I whine as I put on a dark blackish plum dress.

The dress has long sleeves and goes to the floor. The back is a corset but the neck is squared off. When I put it on, the dress is tight until my hips and flares out. The dress has a satin base a plum shade with lace overlay in black. It's beautiful. Haruhi turns around and gasps. She smiles widely, having gotten into the whole shopping thing over the hours. She ties the corset and I'm surprised when I look at the back and see that it shoes nothing.

"You guys take forever," one of the twins exclaims.

"Let us take our time," Haruhi chides.

She turns around and I lace up the back for her. Her dress is a knee length pastel green. It looks beautiful on her, but I take her hair into my hands. I put her hair into a bun and fix her sweetheart neckline. The dress is like sheath, but with Haruhi's figure it looks like its runway material. Her white shoes go with the dress beautifully. I smile at her and she blushes as she looks at herself in the mirror.

"I think I'm going to get you this one," I tell her.

"No way Senpai. I don't want you to buy me a dress. Besides I already have too many," she argues with not enough enthusiasm. She must like the dress.

"Yes, but none of them looked like this. You look beautiful in this one," I tell her. She blushes again and I chuckle at her expression in the mirror.

"Okay, but you have to take that dress for yourself," she tells me. I shake my head. "No buts. You are getting it. Just watch, everyone is going to think you look beautiful."

"If you say so," I mutter and touch my bruised face. If my face wasn't so bruised it might actually be nice. But right now, I think I look like a little gangster girl playing dress up.

"Guys come on out!" Tamaki yells, way too excited.

"We're coming," I yell back.

When we open the door, Tamaki freezes in place. I watch as his mouth drops open and he looks at me surprised. No words escape his mouth. His vision turns to Haruhi and I could swear I can see something blossom in his eyes. I turn to the rest of the brothel. The Hitachiin twins are gazing at me with blatantly surprised faces. Mori and Honey are smiling happily. When my eyes meet those of the cold boy, I meet uncertainty. His hand is to his mouth in an attempt to shield the fact that it's dropped open. I smile at his expression and he smiles at me. But his eyes are looking at me so softly, that I think this isn't actually Kyoya. It couldn't be.

"Good?" I ask breathlessly.

Kyoya merely nods once. I smile at him and he walks to me. Butterflies gather in my stomach and I wonder why I'm so nervous all of a sudden. I wonder when I got so short when I stare up at Kyoya. His hand moves away from his mouth and I blush. My heart is pounding in my chest, but I like this feeling. My eyes want to flutter closed but I keep them open and watch his mouth. Is he going to kiss me? Oh my god, this is what happens in the movies. I feel like I'm going to faint when his hand brushes my ear. His fingers are cold. They grab a lose strand of hair and tucks it behind my ear. Almost realizing what he's done, his eyes seem to brighten and he steps back.

"Are you guys alright there?" Honey asks as I look away from Kyoya.

I hope everyone isn't look at me. Turning to see the others, I'm relieved to see that they're too busy with each other. The only one who is standing with a knowing look is Honey. I glare at the little demon and go back into the dressing room. Haruhi follows a moment after and we get out of our dresses. The brothel wants us to try on more but I don't want to put out my tenants too badly. That and I don't want whatever Kyoya did to happen again. I think I've had enough weird things for today.

"We thank you for letting us stay here, Susan-hime," the girls say at the checkout, as they put our dresses into bags.

"You know I couldn't let you guys stay there," I reply. They only give me happy smiles. I give them smiles back and take my bag and hand Haruhi's hers.

"Susan-sama," Haru says behind my back. I turn when I hear the concern in his tone.

"What?" I asked. He looks at me with an angry face.

"We need to go. Something happened at one of our storage houses," he tells me. Nodding stiffly, I give my dress to Hana who is standing nearby. She doesn't look at all calm. I touch her hand as I give her the bag and give her a reassuring smile. She stops with the angry and fearful aura. I rotate and see Kyoya's bodyguards watching me carefully. I sneer at them and turn to the brothel.

"It's been nice and all, but I have to leave," I tell them.

"But we were going to go get some food!" Tamaki yells. I look at my phone.

"It's almost midnight guys. Besides there's some stuff I have to settle at home before the week starts," I reply and then move away. The cousins are tense and I wonder what happened during our outing. We leave the store and are walking quickly to the exit. The mall empty except for our rapid footsteps.

"Susan-chan!" a voice yells as we round the corner in the mall. I turn and see that it's Kyoya.

"What?" I ask, a little too harsh for his own good. The boy replaces his face with an angry mask. He runs to me but remains ten feet from me.

"Don't come to school like that. It doesn't suit you," he replies with a smirk as he motions to my face. I snort and look at him with cocky smile.

"But bruises and cuts are my best accessories," I tell him before turning and leaving him there.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Hey everybody! Author here. How is everyone doing? I'm putting this up from my school library a I hope it isn't too choppy. PS this keyboard sucks, some keys get sssssssssssssssssssssssssssstuck. Anyway, cute moment with our two weirdos. In addition, I'm thinking about making Kasanoda as a love interest. Anyone up for that? Please let me know if you like this story. I'm going to try to get the chapters out more regularly, but if not I won't leave you on a cliff-hanger. Promise. Anyways, let me know if you like this, I kinda get worried if no comments come in. <strong>_

_**As always, Review, Follow, Fave, Obsess. Love you guys! See you soon. **_


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